freezelouise43
Chatty Member
Oh no that’s awful I’m so so sorry- a lady I work with is in the exact same situation and he just won’t leave xx
Dating after lockdown #38 midnight messages from the ghost of boyfriends past
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whoareyouu
VIP Member
It is awful. I feel as though I can’t relax. He is abusive too, emotionally and verbally so I feel in such a trap. X
Kitty kat 20
Chatty Member
He has no respect for you @freezelouise43 you deserve far better.
Also does he actually have cancer or did he lie about that aswell? Wouldn't put it past him.
Also does he actually have cancer or did he lie about that aswell? Wouldn't put it past him.
freezelouise43
Chatty Member
No it turns out it was a “close family member”
…thank you I know, I’m just angry and wish the decency to at least contribute something would prevail,…absolute disgrace---
I’m so so sorry, do you have a good support network? Xx
Been talking to a guy from last few weeks about 7 weeks I would say (2 weeks I was away), we have had 3 dates, he has been decent, respectful and so consistent, although I noticed a change in his behaviour from Wednesday so today I asked him the dreaded “are we ok” and he said he doesn’t know if we would be long term. I had been honest with him about me being celibate from last 3 years so he said that’s why he hasn’t tried anything with me in case it’s a one off and doesn’t want to leave me feeling hurt or upset after.
The reason why I had asked if we were ok was cause when I went over to his on Wednesday, apart from giving me a brief hello kiss he made no move on me and I must admit I’m old fashioned, maybe I should’ve made a move on him first but I didn’t and he didn’t either. I was so annoyed cause I had to book in a last minute Hollywood wax, usually it’s every fortnight and all for nothing
The reason why I had asked if we were ok was cause when I went over to his on Wednesday, apart from giving me a brief hello kiss he made no move on me and I must admit I’m old fashioned, maybe I should’ve made a move on him first but I didn’t and he didn’t either. I was so annoyed cause I had to book in a last minute Hollywood wax, usually it’s every fortnight and all for nothing
I've had 3 first dates lately, really proud of myself because I didn't want to see any of them again and just messagedd them to say as much (2/3 in a pretty timely manner). Previously I would just go quieter and hope they get the hint because I felt bad flat out rejecting them (I know thats stupid and not fair on them), or even go on a second date in the hope I'd like them more the second time.
The most recent one gave me the major ick, might give other people a laugh - we met for a coffee, he didn't offer to get mine (it was $4.80 which is probably about £3). He rode his motorbike and insisted on walking me to my car, holding his motorbike helmet in the crook of his elbow like a handbag. He also had a brace on his arm, fine if it's a proper injury but it clearly wasn't and was the type of bandage you get at the chemist for $10 that does duck all. My back was hurting and I winced for a second, so of course he told me he's good at massages with a wink. Then sent me a message after about how great it was and he wanted to spend more time with me and get to know more about (insert my name here), and got my name wrong. I will be single for the rest of my life if this is what's out there.
The most recent one gave me the major ick, might give other people a laugh - we met for a coffee, he didn't offer to get mine (it was $4.80 which is probably about £3). He rode his motorbike and insisted on walking me to my car, holding his motorbike helmet in the crook of his elbow like a handbag. He also had a brace on his arm, fine if it's a proper injury but it clearly wasn't and was the type of bandage you get at the chemist for $10 that does duck all. My back was hurting and I winced for a second, so of course he told me he's good at massages with a wink. Then sent me a message after about how great it was and he wanted to spend more time with me and get to know more about (insert my name here), and got my name wrong. I will be single for the rest of my life if this is what's out there.
whathastheworldcometo
VIP Member
It this is all that's out there all women are better off being single for the rest of their lives
EddyDarling
VIP Member
Well, apparently I attract racists. Just had an Indian guy I was talking to ask if my daughter's dad is black because I said he wasn't involved 
no, but I am mixed race Jamaican ffs
no, but I am mixed race Jamaican ffs
Lalla
VIP Member
Well, apparently I attract racists. Just had an Indian guy I was talking to ask if my daughter's dad is black because I said he wasn't involved
Just after my eldest was born the visiting midwife asked if his dad was in the picture and when I said no, her follow up question was 'Black, is he?' - that was a quarter of a century ago, kinda hoped attitudes had moved on since then!
sweetbabymango
Well-known member
When he keeps liking a bunch of reels about long distance relationships, suggesting he is in one, yet still adds you as a close friend on Instagram! And it happened quite recently, meaning he was already calling whatever he has 'a relationship'. He did it so subtle as well, I only noticed when I saw his highlights where he had recently added stories that where posted only for close friends.
FYI we’re nowhere near being friends. Just liking each others stories of ourselves, and we messaged a few times, in one of which he suggested to meet up next time I'm in his home country. We didn't end up meeting because he couldn't make it on the days when I was there but eventually said he might be coming to my country the following month. Guess what? That fell through as well (don't think it was his fault tho). Now I'm thinking the first time didn't work out because he already had eyes for someone else and simply didn't want to go on a date that could lead to something more.
Yes, I could have done more or made my feelings clearer but I still can't believe my luck he had to meet someone during those few weeks from when we agreed to meet and the supposed date. From socials it seems he hasn't been in a serious relationship for quire some time. I'm absolutely gutted but also confused where I stand! It's not like I'm a booty call away and if he wanted to cheat on his partner, he could have done so possibly even before they called it a long-distance relationship.
FYI we’re nowhere near being friends. Just liking each others stories of ourselves, and we messaged a few times, in one of which he suggested to meet up next time I'm in his home country. We didn't end up meeting because he couldn't make it on the days when I was there but eventually said he might be coming to my country the following month. Guess what? That fell through as well (don't think it was his fault tho). Now I'm thinking the first time didn't work out because he already had eyes for someone else and simply didn't want to go on a date that could lead to something more.
Yes, I could have done more or made my feelings clearer but I still can't believe my luck he had to meet someone during those few weeks from when we agreed to meet and the supposed date. From socials it seems he hasn't been in a serious relationship for quire some time. I'm absolutely gutted but also confused where I stand! It's not like I'm a booty call away and if he wanted to cheat on his partner, he could have done so possibly even before they called it a long-distance relationship.
I’m hungover so feel more emotional more than usual.
But I feel like I’m getting rejected one way or another by men at the moment and it’s so hard espically at this time of the year!
I could just cry that I haven’t met my Prince Charming who really likes me and is obsessed with me (in a good way!)
But I feel like I’m getting rejected one way or another by men at the moment and it’s so hard espically at this time of the year!
I could just cry that I haven’t met my Prince Charming who really likes me and is obsessed with me (in a good way!)
I’m hungover so feel more emotional more than usual.
But I feel like I’m getting rejected one way or another by men at the moment and it’s so hard espically at this time of the year!
I could just cry that I haven’t met my Prince Charming who really likes me and is obsessed with me (in a good way!)
I’ll be even more real that for once I just want to feel loved by a man!!
In other news, the ex that scammed me out of £30 last Xmas has unblocked me so that’s give me a laugh haha
ToolaRoola
VIP Member
Christmas can be hard when single as we're seeing couples do all lovely things but on the flip side, more people are out at Christmas drinks etc, so now is a perfect time to get out and start talking to people!
Last year I gatecrashed work guys (WG) Christmas do, it's the night he admitted to liking me after 6 weeks of talking/flirting. I actually met a group of guys in there but wasn't interested due to WG.
Fast forward to this week and I was back in the same bar for another Christmas do, WG wasn't there thankfully.
Details are a little blurry due to drinking the bar dry of wine but I met a guy in there who made it very obvious he was interested in me. He was nice but I liked his friend more and ended up spending the night talking to him and he took my number and messaged the same night but....he lives up North and he's only 28 I'm not going to bother pursuing it.
Then just because I'm me and turn into a wild child when drunk, I ended up kissing a different work guy. Another one I'm not really interested in pursuing anything with especially after this last year with WG.
But, it's nice to meet men in the wild. Particularly after feeling down last week about WG.
Last year I gatecrashed work guys (WG) Christmas do, it's the night he admitted to liking me after 6 weeks of talking/flirting. I actually met a group of guys in there but wasn't interested due to WG.
Fast forward to this week and I was back in the same bar for another Christmas do, WG wasn't there thankfully.
Details are a little blurry due to drinking the bar dry of wine
but I met a guy in there who made it very obvious he was interested in me. He was nice but I liked his friend more and ended up spending the night talking to him and he took my number and messaged the same night but....he lives up North and he's only 28 I'm not going to bother pursuing it. Then just because I'm me and turn into a wild child when drunk, I ended up kissing a different work guy. Another one I'm not really interested in pursuing anything with especially after this last year with WG.
But, it's nice to meet men in the wild. Particularly after feeling down last week about WG.
monepierce
Well-known member
Christmas can be hard when single as we're seeing couples do all lovely things but on the flip side, more people are out at Christmas drinks etc, so now is a perfect time to get out and start talking to people!
Last year I gatecrashed work guys (WG) Christmas do, it's the night he admitted to liking me after 6 weeks of talking/flirting. I actually met a group of guys in there but wasn't interested due to WG.
Fast forward to this week and I was back in the same bar for another Christmas do, WG wasn't there thankfully.
Details are a little blurry due to drinking the bar dry of wine
Then just because I'm me and turn into a wild child when drunk, I ended up kissing a different work guy. Another one I'm not really interested in pursuing anything with especially after this last year with WG.
But, it's nice to meet men in the wild. Particularly after feeling down last week about WG.
does anyone have any advice on meeting guys in the wild? I quit dating apps nearly 2 years ago and I’m wondering how to go about it
ToolaRoola
VIP Member
I just speak to people. It's not normally with the intention for anything romantic, I'm just extremely friendly when drunk
but even though I have no problem talking to people, it doesn't normally go any further. I've not successfully dated anyone I've met in the wild. But it is harder these days. I don't think people speak to each other as much anymore as they have options on apps.
EddyDarling
VIP Member
I'm speaking to another ginger man with tattoos.
Good Egg
VIP Member
I loves me a ginger!
Some advice about meeting in the wild. I guess Dutch courage and just be friendly and chatty. It is more difficult and I’m certain, it’s way more harder to find people in the wild!
Joined a local FB singles group which is fine they do meet ups etc BUT this guy was like can i DM you and I said yes and he was I know your friend, we used to go drinking and he’s bombarded me with messages quick block and delete and messages friend to get the lowdown on the person...
Not keen on being bombarded with messages.
FWB guy still in the background of my mind. Hard one to shake off. I can’t believe he turned out to be the person he was. It’s especially this time of year. It’s tough because everyone is all coupled up and talking about all the things they are doing... I’ll be in my PJs necking Prosecco and eating a selection box...
I’ll be here for you all like you were for me over Christmas. Maybe we could arrange a chatty meet up here. I’ll bring the vino xx
Some advice about meeting in the wild. I guess Dutch courage and just be friendly and chatty. It is more difficult and I’m certain, it’s way more harder to find people in the wild!
Joined a local FB singles group which is fine they do meet ups etc BUT this guy was like can i DM you and I said yes and he was I know your friend, we used to go drinking and he’s bombarded me with messages quick block and delete and messages friend to get the lowdown on the person...
Not keen on being bombarded with messages.
FWB guy still in the background of my mind. Hard one to shake off. I can’t believe he turned out to be the person he was. It’s especially this time of year. It’s tough because everyone is all coupled up and talking about all the things they are doing... I’ll be in my PJs necking Prosecco and eating a selection box...
I’ll be here for you all like you were for me over Christmas. Maybe we could arrange a chatty meet up here. I’ll bring the vino xx