Alfies Irrelevant Deyes of Arrested Development

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GossWhore said:
I won't lie - it was cute, HOWEVER I know Afl done it 80% for Youtube, 20% for Zoe
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Probably 99% vlog 1% Zoe. If his camera suddenly shut off or something happened to the footage everything would’ve been for nothing... there she is in the thumbnail, all over Twitter, in the title. I would feel so used being Zoe. Also such a dick move pulling these surpises that 100% point at a proposal..thank god it wasn’t though can’t think of anything tackier than proposing on your business launch party in front of your friends and coworker lol
 
cuzisayso said:
He looks like such a horse with his new teeth

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I thought the veneers were supposed to deal with the gumminess? Is he just so gummy even veneers can’t save him?
 
I remember they once went into maybe Tiffany & Co on his vlog and she tried on rings. Haha..She's waitey zoe...

Well, their neighbour was kind to allow the fireworks show (and probably happy to have some crazy fireworks show for free)

And everyone knows how BUSY Alfie is, so he needed to plan a fireworks show on the day itself, I'm sure the invite was sent weeks ago (didn't Zoella cornybook says to send invites way in advance? )

It's flexing their wealth. It's like those reality tv, "we need to FLY somewhere TODAY because of an emergency and it's so stressful to go find a private pilot yada yada"

I don't even know why he asked her if all the guests will be dressed all INNNN, I don't think people will send you their outfit photos in advance. You send out the invites with the dress code and people are supposedly to dress accordingly.

Imagine everyone wondering if they're going to see the fireworks spelling, "MARRY ME ZOE"
 
boredjess said:
I don't even know why he asked her if all the guests will be dressed all INNNN, I don't think people will send you their outfit photos in advance.
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Honestly, if Alfie spoke properly, as opposed to shouting and using cringey phrases like “all INNN”, “yo!”, “send it!”, “sick” etc. He would be way more likeable and watchable. Because him basically speaking the way he does is the quickest way to make me turn off a video. I skipped the first half of the fireworks video just to not hear him talking.
 
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  • Alfie acts like a 5-year-old, not a 25-year-old "where are we going? Zoe said we are going to Belgium" -- is Zoe your mother or gf?
  • "It's gonna take me a day or 2 to get back into daily vlogging, daily vlogging is a way of life. Give me a day or so and I will give you some banging vlogs" --- I doubt it
  • Alfie farting on Mark is so rude! Telling that Mark said "Poppy sort your brother out" --- instead of referring to Zoe
  • There seems to be an accident on the road --- fire and police, so Alfie filmed it!??
  • "We are going to the Christmas market, but none of us has cash" --- these privileged idiots!!! What dumbasses!!
  • Alfie kept in all the swearing in his vlog --- trynna appeal to the 18+ demographic? lol
  • Still, trynna plug his merch "order now before you lot moan it didn't arrive before Christmas"
 
The road fire and police situation in France was well publicised riots/protests going on in France at the moment. It takes no effort to read up about it, it’s been in the headlines of BBC News, just shows how much he and the rest of them all focus on their own little world and take no notice of anything else. Because none of them had a clue really about the protests.
 
Srh1984 said:
Fireworks one, start of it is so trying to be Casey Neistat

Flat earther one, tryingto be Shane Dawson. This guy got an original bone in his body?
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I wouldn't mind if he's inspired by other people, but his poor execution and non existent dedication mean Alfie just comes up with useless content that serves no purpose other than entertain people that would worship his shits.

He needs to spend less time stealing motivational quotes and more time actually working.
 
Day 2 in Brugge, and Zoe starts of so patronising towards Alfie about his lazy wake up habits. She sounds like a mother chastising a child. It’s really weird. Then Alfie jokes about them breaking up over it, and says about how everyone expected him to propose to Zoe with the fireworks.

They walk past a sex shop, which is busy, and Alfie doesn’t understand why. Doesn’t think normal people go to sex shops. Personally I thought it just showed how little Zalfie have sex, and how likely boring it is when they do it Alfie can’t imagine people needing things from a sex shop.

Alfie just presents the vlog as largely going from one meal to the next, and back to the hotel with a little bit of shopping in between.
 
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  • Alfie starts the vlog -- basically arguing with Zoe about him not getting up quickly
  • Alfie mentions how people said he should have proposed LOL
  • Alfie and Zoe's argument is like a mum and her child "You need to get ready"
  • Zoe would rather sit next to Mark at breakfast then Alfie
  • More swearing in the vlog "that's the kind of tit that scares you" (in reference to the paintings in the hotel room)
  • ZOE BACK TO THE CHILDREN COMMENTS
  • LOL at Alfie talking about Halloween next year and potential guests/friends "We could have our friends - Mark, Joe, Poppy, Sean" -- THAT'S ALL THEIR FRIENDS!!!!!!!! LOL
  • Alfie: "Don't think I have ever seen a more popular sex shop, is it famous? I don't think the average person is interested in a sex shop" ----LOOL aww at least we know the lack of sex in Zalfies relationship
  • Alfie: "this view is so picturesque" ---- I honestly hate people who use this word, as we all know its the only word you remember from GCSE English literature, but now you are bleeping Shakespeare

  • Alfie said he uploaded a flat-earther video "its an hour-long" ---THANKS, NOW I KNOW NOT TO WATCH IT, AN HOUR????? FML -- NOT TODAY SATAN
 
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