Alfies Irrelevant Deyes of Arrested Development

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i am enjoying the vlogmas right now because there traveling. and Zoe actually has quite entertaining footage somehow, but Poppy and Alfie just make me cringe. their both trying so hard to be cool and a part of the jokes, but they just dont fit in.
 
Alfie. Time to have a kid!!
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GossWhore said:
Alfie said he uploaded a flat-earther video "its an hour-long" ---THANKS, NOW I KNOW NOT TO WATCH IT, AN HOUR????? FML -- NOT TODAY SATAN
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The ghosts in that creepy room made some noise as they were arguing and alfie says the room's haunted
I think even the ghosts were bored!

NOOOOOOOOOOO AN HOUR>>>>>>>> NOOOOOOOOOOOOO
 
STJ_95 said:
Because nobody actually believes him.
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Ok touché... idk why it seemed to me like he was serious. Not necessarily because he wants to, but I got the feeling he must’ve had a pretty serious conversation about it with Zoe which ended up with her telling him this is the latest she will wait. He acted like teenager about it: “everyone put your hands for babies next year”!
 
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  • "Reality of Vlogmas, finding somewhere with good internet" -- I get Zalfie do this for their "jobs" but it's not that deep, Mark edited in the car and is really chilled -- Alfie is running crazy trynna upload
  • Alfie states "We were just saying by Zoes age my parents had Poppy....let's all put our hands in -- BABY'S NEXT YEAR" --- such a head
  • Alfiel "everyone insults me" ---- come to Tattle.Life we will insult you for deyes lol (this must be because in Zoes vlog a "fan" said he was an hole, he pretended not to care but hes seriously butt-hurt lol)
  • Mark reads "You are kinda like Rapunzel instead of letting your hair down, you let everyone down" -- No lies detected
  • Mark also read "Maybe if you ate all that makeup you will be pretty inside" -- should have said it to Zoe lol

  • Back in the car -- Alfie decided to play "catch" with a bottle -- chucking it at Poppy -- lovely bro there
  • Alfie jokes "finally Mark has gone home" -- you know secretly he's crying for his lover lol
  • Alfie comments than him and Zoe need to try not to film the same stuff and Zoe adds "we have different editing and filming styles" -- nono, there are both mediocre
  • He ordered something which is a "90s throwback" -- probably a ps1, Tamagotchi --- something frivolous and dumb

sitesorestrictive said:
He's going to be under 4 millions within the next 2 weeks
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Just in time for Christmas!!

MERRY CHRISTMAS lol
 
Iced Coffee said:
I'm still rolling my eyes over that dumb flat earther interview. After watching him ramble in his stupid "work presentation" thing, I'm 100% convinced he not-so-low-key believes in all these conspiracy theories lol
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100%, he talked about the earth beeing flat in another video with Zoe as a "joke". I didn´t watch the video, buy I can´t sleep without some noise, so generaly, I play youtube videos as back noise at night and usualy Zoe´s and Alfie´s vlogs just pop in the reproduction playlist (don´t know why), and today loads of videos regarding flat earthers were recomended to me...couldn´t figure why until I read here and found out that Alfie made a "podcast" about it...LOL
 
Helloally said:
Ok touché... idk why it seemed to me like he was serious. Not necessarily because he wants to, but I got the feeling he must’ve had a pretty serious conversation about it with Zoe which ended up with her telling him this is the latest she will wait. He acted like teenager about it: “everyone put your hands for babies next year”!
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Maybe he's been reading comments on how poorly he treats Zoe so he's pretending he's all about that family life with Zoe but I won't believe it until Zoe actually gives birth to a baby. As much as they both want a family, I don't think they realize how much much work raising a baby entails. It's not like having a dog as much as Zoe babies Nala. Not even close. They like their independence and not having any responsibilities judging by their vlogs.

If anything that comment made me think he's still poking fun at Zoe, like all those grand gestures he does for her but no ring. If he wanted a kid it would be so he has an excuse to play with all the toys. Those dolls he bought are sitting at the bottom of a box somewhere in their house and collecting dust for all of time.

I can't believe he did a flat Earther video (it's not edgy or interesting as he thinks it is and what a dumb conspiracy) and he's still losing subscribers left and right-- at least he's consistent with that.
 
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  • At the beginning he starts with a ginger shot ---- but did you not eat a chocolate ice cream before bed?? WHAT WILL THE SHOT DO
  • I think Zoe keeps Alfie around to edit for her -- as she didn't know how to zoom on a clip so Alfie did it
  • Alfie MIGHT be making a game --- oohhh live o £1 board game, annoying phases game, steal ideas game????
  • Alfie is late to a minute???? --- NEVER
  • Btw he was a late to a meeting for a company (Dobble game) HE REACHED OUT TO -- they are doing you a favour!
  • Its Holly birthday in the office-- meaning Zoella cake and party hat -- did your birthday even happen if you don't vlog it
  • "Picking a thumbnail takes ages" -- it doesn't make the content better
  • He included him meeting a fans mum and signing something to show from yesterdays vlog he isn't an hole -- you are not sly Alfie
  • He looked like a right DICK walking down the street "repping" his merch
  • Alfie "I don't know how to pose" in regards to his Blogosphere cover --- we can tell
 
I didn’t usually bother watching his vlogs much in the last year but is he bullshitting saying he’s playing this Dobble game all the time?!

He might not know how to pose (how to act like an adult, how to string a sentence together) but he does have a makeup collection that’s nearly as big as Zoe’s to cover up those bags and conceal that sweaty face ?

His thumbnails are art work in themselves...... doesn’t youtube give you a default 3 images from your vlog if you’re struggling to chose yourself, SEND THAT ALF! Tap that? Hit that? Get that?
??‍♀️
What ever happened chai? The loser friend?!

“Ya boi’s on the cover”
Amanda........ you can never make up for this. You made this asshole ?
You dropped this asshole (unconfirmed) ?
 
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