Zoella De Vile - Cordially Invites Pedos and Torys to Casa De Zalfe

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You now you've made it when your "boobs" end up being a ClevverNews video





Also, saw this article on Zara McDermott from Love Island and it made me think of Zoes phantom boobs
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GossWhore said:
Multiple reasons - I asked a question on why people watch the Youtuber they watch, and it was called "spam", the items they bought posts, discussing politics e.g. Alfies "i Am nOt A ToRY" line and the arguments which ensued due to the fake "insider" on Zoes thread.

But as stated - this is a new era, none of that BS.
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Yes! Glad to have you back! I was a lurker on the GG thread and I must say, some of your posts cracked me up. That's really awful about the mods, Zoe just seems to have a way of making people blow positivity up her arse. Anyway, we can continue bitching and gossiping in style over here!
 
I'm not surprised at all, but I do work in the industry. People like Zoella charge super high rates so don't actually do sponsored IG posts that often. Typically a post that's paid for will be part of a campaign that involves an instastory, tweets and video.

Beauty people I know even with "just" 50k followers can still command £800 a post.

She earns tit loads and people often underestimate this. Always say the monthly fave videos could be pulling in £200k+, especially around Christmas.

Same with the ASOS / Lush videos. How much is she paid by the brand? 50-60k I would guess, all not disclosed as they know she will be nice so without editorial control, they don't need to declare it as an AD. Then all the earnings on affiliate links (typically 5-10% of total basket for beauty). Then the super high adsense rates the gleam lot get of £10-£15 CPM.

Considering she still hasn't sold out the signed copies of the book (how many are there? 10-15k?) despite loads of post shows she isn't that influential - 0.001% of her own fans buy a signed book at half price.
 
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^ It's disgusting how much money she makes for doing the bare minimum. She's lucky to have entered YT at it's peak, otherwise she would be working a regular 9-5 in Wiltshire. Who knows she might even have more personality now if that had happened.

I know a lot of people attribute her recluse tendencies to her anxiety but I think it's because in her bubble she's able to control everything for the most part. For example, with traveling there is a lot more logistics that would be out of her hand. Controlling and belittling her friends and family is what makes her feel relevant and most importantly she's in her 'safe space'. I just know that if I had her lax schedule and financial means I would do a lot more traveling. In fact, I don't have anywhere near Zoe's net worth and I travel more than she does and actually leave my airbnb/hotel when in said city.

I know Mark is her bestie (for now) but I'm wondering how the dynamic will be once he's in a more serious relationship. I don't really follow Mark but I'm guessing he's single atm? Which is why he's able to go to Brighton and hang out with Zoe at the drop of a dime. I think that's why she's so fond of Mark bc she can control him and most importantly because he isn't still a big enough YTer to branch away from Zoe. I think that was one of the many issues with Zoe and Louise's friendship. Zoe couldn't control Louise once she started getting traction. And while Zoe and Alfie continue their micro passive-aggressive transactions (like tuning the other person out by staring at their phone or shutting the car door during mid convo), Zoe puts up with Alfie because she can't stand being single and because she's invested too many years to give it all up despite Alfie not wanting a family atm or even being remotely interested in Zoe anymore judging by body language and his answers in all of his Q+A type videos.
 
She's pretty good at manipulating the minions that she's their friend but also on a much higher level than any of them. Adults can see right through her and so will most of her followers as they get older.

Thrilling Saturday for a couple in their 20s
, he must hate his life and resent her more with each day. He barely hides it in his own videos and wants to blame her for the boring life. But he'd have just as dull life without her I think. I wonder if this post is #couplegoals or just #adgoals

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3 instastory and a feed post for the grand (all tagged and no #ad naturally), she'll have made 30 grand for this no doubt.
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Zoe looks very old in the picture (with the green top). The combination of her super matte makeup, her very prominent laugh lines, and those weird lines around her mouth that extend to her chin does her no favors. If I didn't know who she was I would have guessed that she was at best in her late 30s or well into her 40s. I'm guessing Zoe doesn't believe in using sun screen/sun cream?

I'm wondering why she thought this was a good picture of her. She looks like a ventriloquist dummy.
 
thenomad said:
Zoe looks very old in the picture (with the green top). The combination of her super matte makeup, her very prominent laugh lines, and those weird lines around her mouth that extend to her chin does her no favors. If I didn't know who she was I would have guessed that she was at best in her late 30s or well into her 40s. I'm guessing Zoe doesn't believe in using sun screen/sun cream?

I'm wondering why she thought this was a good picture of her. She looks like a ventriloquist dummy.
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The bad photo on her feed is what makes me think it was an AD and she had to post it.

Sure afternoon tea at a luxury hotel sounds nice. But if you're paid to do it on a certain day, get x amount of photos and really not in the mood it's a chore. I'm reading too much into one photo, but wouldn't surprise me if they had an argument but still had to go out for this "date" for work.

The photo seems so unauthentic and forced, even for her.

Is she ever genuinely happy? What is her personal life and what is work?
 
^ It probably was an ad, no doubt. But I think Zoe probably also thought this was a good picture because she's all done up (instead of slumming it in front of the tv as usual) and the pose she is making highlights how "tiny" she is, which we all know she loves hearing.

What is her next excuse for not posting videos, it's been a few weeks. Her previous excuse was that she supposedly lost the Ingham clip was and the vlog was delayed bc she was busy promoting her cookbook and her Botanics Splash line but what does she have going on now? Other than obsessing over autumn.
 
Oh god, so I'm cleaning my house and I thought I'd see if any of the annoying ones had uploaded to give me something to roll my eyes too and I can't even get past 7 minutes of zoe's monkey mazes etc vlog because she is SO ANNOYING. Who does jump scares in a car? I just can't. Urgh i guess I need to put a movie on or something!!

This is as far as I got and I wanted to wring her neck. How do they put up with her? she's so beyond cringe.

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Any other mentions of the lost footage or the Ingham's?

I imagine she's keeping a low profile and will start posting alot near when the book out in October.

Still hasn't sold out the signed copies yet.

Is that the end of sugglife crap? The domain just has a blank page. Joe always had a tiny bit more scruples when it came to selling cheap tat for a way too much to minions.
 
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