Niomi Smart #86 The woman is having a never ending existential crisis

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It’s amazing how much the Joe break up destroyed her. Because I can’t even imagine her missing him as a person that much, their connection seemed so shallow and superficial. Their conversations were stilted and awkward and they were never on the same wavelength with jokes or anything. They didn’t come across like best friends.
I think him leaving triggered a much deeper abandonment wound from her biological father leaving them. It had likely been festering for years and nobody ever did anything about it when she was a child or teenager. I blame her mum for that tbh. I believe that’s why it devastated her life so much.
 
I think she'll drop all the woo stuff the second she meets a new man who mentions he doesn't believe in it. Perhaps she'll meet someone actually quite normal and her new boyfriend inspired personality might end up being vaguely normal again?

She'll always be spoiled, selfish and narcissistic but she'd do far better without all this self obsessed woo!

If she got back with Forky or someone like him, then she'd adopt a whole new persona and drop all that. Forky would take the piss out of her for all the woo stuff and I doubt he'd have much time for Human Garbage either.

Actually, she should move to Dubai with Forky if he'd even take her back at this point. They'd both fit right in there.

Just took a look at his latest stories, though, and maybe he has a new female already.
 
I have to say I actually hope her family fully accept her back. One of the first things manipulative or abusive partners will do is cut you off from your support network - making sure that you are the one to show the behaviours that lead to you being cut off from them so you can't keep an open line of communication or escape.

Her best chance of not going back to him time and again is a solid support network that is willing to forgive and stand by her, and ensure she has someone other than Jamie when she is lonely, sad, or scared.
Yes absolutely this! I know we all say about how they can’t keep forgiving her for cutting them off etc but if my parents hadn’t been welcoming for me when my coercively controlling, gambling addict ex was at his absolute worst I expect I’d still be there with him three years later in even more crippling debt than before. My relationship with them was a bit fractured for a while but they still helped me out and supported me going absolutely no contact (I perceived it as way over the top at the time but I never would be where I am now if they didn’t do it) when I found it hard, I swear if they’d not done that then I’d still be in the same place, probably just an even worse one!

That aside though with them over what on earth will we talk about in here, shadows?!
 
I wonder if she’ll keep her next relationship off SM? On one hand I think, she’s about to turn 33, she’s been burned by over sharing so much in the past, surely she’ll keep things private in future… But then there’s the side of her that can’t resist showing off.
 
I wonder if she’ll keep her next relationship off SM? On one hand I think, she’s about to turn 33, she’s been burned by over sharing so much in the past, surely she’ll keep things private in future… But then there’s the side of her that can’t resist showing off.
She's desperate for adulation/ attention so I can't see her abstaining from oversharing the 'next chapter'😴😴
 
She harps on about following your instincts, but her instincts about him were right from the very beginning. She knew he was bad news but he kept pushing and she was too vulnerable to walk away.
Speaking from experience though it’s really hard to walk away. I know I’m probably double posting about my ex but I went on our first date just to prove we weren’t going to work out and I purely went because he kept on and on and on and it was easier just to go. Then I’d decided I didn’t want to see him again and he pushed and pushed and pushed until I agreed, and then that was the story of my entire 7 year relationship with him. Maybe I was weak and vulnerable but I was only able to walk away because I was literally moving, my landlady was selling my flat. And even then he kept pushing to see me again, I blocked him everywhere and he’d find other ways to contact me even via my work email. I changed my number and blocked him on everything but people who are that manipulative and coercive are really bloody good at it…
 
She’s sharing this once again on her stories. So she posted it on stories once, posted it as part of her recent carousel, and now posted it on stories again. Bit of a heavy-handed dig at Lordon, I presume

My take: wrong turn = jamie, landscapes you haven’t seen before = Bahhhli

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If she got back with Forky or someone like him, then she'd adopt a whole new persona and drop all that. Forky would take the piss out of her for all the woo stuff and I doubt he'd have much time for Human Garbage either.

Actually, she should move to Dubai with Forky if he'd even take her back at this point. They'd both fit right in there.

Just took a look at his latest stories, though, and maybe he has a new female already.

Looks like it.He seems to be in his element over there,unsurprisingly.
 
Tbh I don’t think she’s going to address breakup numero 2 at all. She’s just going to start posting holiday content, vlog around London, talk about how happy she is on this next journey of her life. And then maybe a couple weeks or months from now she’ll slip in just one sentence and be like “I’m single but I’ve truly learned to love myself, etc.” and then never talk about it again. I think she’s embarrassed she ever even went back to him at all and doesn’t want to admit that to her viewers.
 
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