Mumsnet #48 Cherchez la spunk splatter

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There was a small independent cafe I went to lots during my undergrad where they had a bowl of little chocolates by the till which I assumed were complimentary. I'd often take one while paying for my lunch. One day I noticed there was now a price tag on the bowl and realised I had been stealing chocolates. Still feel bad about it a good 12 years later 😅
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CrimsonCountess said:
The post was WAY too long to screenshot it all, settle in for a long read if you're going for it. But this has to be a reverse or a troll

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Gosh I hope this is a troll, because otherwise! It's a Bingo card of unpleasant in law relationship thread tropes. It's notable that she conveniently leaves out why her son can't be unsupervised with her grandchildren ('some unfortunate things happened'...)
 
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uberoblique said:
MN cat owners are a special breed. Their cats are allowed to tit all over their neighbours garden because CATS ROAM but if anyone so much as glances in the direction of the stranger’s cat shitting in their garden bed, they’re clearly a CAT THIEF.
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My cats go and tit in next door’s garden. And in return, the foxes come and tit in ours! Absolutely stinks.
It’s like a tit merry go round.
luckily our next door neighbours are all tenants in a twenty-something house share and don’t seem to care at all about their landlord’s garden. So the shitting kitties are in the clear for now.
 
Before we got all grown up and sensible, me and my husband and another couple went on holiday to Slovenia. After our first evening meal, the waiter brought over a bottle of some sort of schnapps for the gentlemen and some kind of fruity liqueur for the ladies. Lads, we emptied both bottles. It was only as the holiday progressed, we realised we were meant to pour ONE shot each and return the bottles, not drink the bleeping lot. Oops. We did go back a few days later and offer to pay for the amount we had imbibed but the staff just laughed and said something probably very rude about the British drinking culture.
 
When we moved to the middle of nowhere a few years back
Unbeknown to me our address is a bit like the Bermuda triangle with deliveries never turning up. So several times I’ve complained that my order has been lost so companies simply reordered the same thing to send to me. By the time it turns up the original delivery has been delivered.
I’ve had free shoes, a ton of make up and a load of expensive houseplants, the fancy ones that are potted for you in those nice expensive looking ceramic pots.
we also got a brand new bed that we sold.
Unfortunately this hasn’t happened In about two years. Gutted but I enjoyed it’
 
Wolf359 said:
My cats go and tit in next door’s garden. And in return, the foxes come and tit in ours! Absolutely stinks.
It’s like a tit merry go round.
luckily our next door neighbours are all tenants in a twenty-something house share and don’t seem to care at all about their landlord’s garden. So the shitting kitties are in the clear for now.
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Our neighbour’s cat doesn’t seem to tit in ours - I see him drifting about and he really enjoys our catmint when it’s in flower. He absolutely delights my toddler though when she spies him outside, it’s the highlight of her day.

Foxes on the other hand, duck me. The number of times I’ve come outside & they’ve literally shat on our doorstep. What’s with that?
 
uberoblique said:
Our neighbour’s cat doesn’t seem to tit in ours - I see him drifting about and he really enjoys our catmint when it’s in flower. He absolutely delights my toddler though when she spies him outside, it’s the highlight of her day.

Foxes on the other hand, duck me. The number of times I’ve come outside & they’ve literally shat on our doorstep. What’s with that?
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Is the fox poo the reason the cat won’t go in your garden?
 
Halister said:
“Fur babies” does make my eyes roll a bit .. but not my problem.

my problem is that people think they should be able to take their dogs and cats (cats I know!), anywhere they want. I have an allergy to both, and the look I get if I’m sat on a train and someone sits next to me with a pet, and I ask them to move.. or if I’m sat in a pub and a dog comes up, and I don’t interact with it - people lose their nut.

I asked the train companies had they considered making one carriage “pet free” but no.

Hotels that allow pets, then don’t properly hoover … infuriating

I was in Costa the other day, a couple of people were in, with a large dog, they were sat at a low table , the dogs head was higher than the table … and it was a drooler … drooled so much the owner had to constantly keep cleaning the table with napkins .. i would have had an uncomfortable time at that table had I sat there next .. drool and dog hair.

I’m dreading the moment I’m stuck in a plane cabin with a cat .. it can only be a matter of time.

We had a dog in the 80s (pre allergy) .. we went out, he stopped at home, unless we were going on a walk. I don’t get the sudden spike in “anxious” dogs that can’t be left alone … I do think it related to “fur baby” culture.
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My large, but not droolly doggo stays at home. I love her and she’s gorgeous but she’s also a head when out and about, not including walks on the lead.

If we took her to a restaurant she’s be in about everyone and hoping for snacks. Not happening.
 
Toddler gave 12 week old a spoonful of jam. Someone advised to phone 111 if they’re worried 🤣🤦🏼‍♀️
 

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I feel the need to confess. I stole some Birds Eye fish fingers from Sainsbury’s around 2 years ago. I assumed I had scanned them but when I got home, I was looking at the receipt and I had not. I felt bad as they were branded but not bad enough to consider how I might contact the store and let them know. I do feel weird going in there now. What if I am on their fish finger thief wall of shame?! 😭😭😭😭
 
ClaraPlum said:
Toddler gave 12 week old a spoonful of jam. Someone advised to phone 111 if they’re worried 🤣🤦🏼‍♀️
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My mum still recalls the time I gave my two weeks old sister a crisp. She gummed it down and at the age of 41 is addicted to Walkers ready salted and cos she got posh at some stage, Tyrrell Mature Cheddar and Chive. She doesn't gobble them down though, she's a not quite teeny tiny
 
I stole Tesco value Angel Delight once. The packs were so bloody thin they stuck together and I only scanned one. It was about 29p.
worse still was the security guard at the time was my cousin. I told him about my larceny a few weeks later and he took the piss mercilessly, culminating in him following me around the store comedy style next time I was in. he was popping up behind bean displays and making the fingers/eyes watching you sign. It was very funny.
 
Itchy of Itchington said:
My mum still recalls the time I gave my two weeks old sister a crisp. She gummed it down and at the age of 41 is addicted to Walkers ready salted and cos she got posh at some stage, Tyrrell Mature Cheddar and Chive. She doesn't gobble them down though, she's a not quite teeny tiny
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My mum had twin brothers who were 15 months older than her. One day when they were about 2.5 they ate a jar of vitamins so my nanna rushed them off to the hospital leaving my mum with a neighbour not realising they'd also tried to feed her them too... They also fed her Maltesers as a baby and she still absolutely loves them 🤣
 
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