Love Island UK 2021 #3

[Lonelylondon]

I really wish they’d just do a series with totally normal people like size 14 Sophie from Yorkshire who works down at B&M or Joe with a normal dad bod who doesn’t have 20k insta followers. No not everyone is the same body type but tuning in and seeing these perfect fake bodies every night and them all putting on an act is just getting boring now

I feel like this is what season 1 and 2 were like and then it blew up and became more ‘Hollywood’

 

[Lmkgirl]

It's such a tricky subject. I thought I was going to be accused of being racially ignorant in the last thread because I called Kaz's bonnet a 'quirky hat' and I received a comment putting me right. I described it as a quirky hat for no reason other than I thought it was brilliant that her nightwear was fully coordinated and not because I was poking fun at her skin colour, but after hearing some of the horrendous examples here today, I can see why I might have given that impression. I'm sorry about that.
The whole name thing is a minefield. If I haven't heard of a name before I can guarantee I won't remember it immediately. This can apply to a huge range of names (including scottish, Irish, English, etc). In some cases, I write it down including pronunciation because I'd be embarrassed to get it wrong. And if I was in a situation where I'd forgotten someone's name, I'd just apologise and ask them. I've got a very unusual and hard to pronounce last name and 9 times out of 10 people struggle to pronounce it, I genuinely feel sorry for them.

With LI, perhaps it's early days to be remembering everyone's name because the contestants aren't that familiar to us yet. I can only temember Aaron and Hugo's names from the boys. I'm not being racist or sexist, I just literally cannot remember all of them yet. Similarly, I get Fay and Chloe mixed up as they look similar at the moment, but in another few episodes they'll look totally different to each other and I'll know who is who. It’s been a great and healthy discussion. In other news, who's Rachel going to choose?

I totally understood you when you called it a quirky hat and recall it being pointed out.
I feel because you took the other posters comment on board so well and with full understanding, everyone knew you weren't being racially ignorant.

I love how you own your previous comments.

I think Rachel is going to have a seizure when she realises what the boys are like lol

 

[jackolantern]

It's such a tricky subject. I thought I was going to be accused of being racially ignorant in the last thread because I called Kaz's bonnet a 'quirky hat' and I received a comment putting me right. I described it as a quirky hat for no reason other than I thought it was brilliant that her nightwear was fully coordinated and not because I was poking fun at her skin colour, but after hearing some of the horrendous examples here today, I can see why I might have given that impression. I'm sorry about that.
The whole name thing is a minefield. If I haven't heard of a name before I can guarantee I won't remember it immediately. This can apply to a huge range of names (including scottish, Irish, English, etc). In some cases, I write it down including pronunciation because I'd be embarrassed to get it wrong. And if I was in a situation where I'd forgotten someone's name, I'd just apologise and ask them. I've got a very unusual and hard to pronounce last name and 9 times out of 10 people struggle to pronounce it, I genuinely feel sorry for them.

With LI, perhaps it's early days to be remembering everyone's name because the contestants aren't that familiar to us yet. I can only temember Aaron and Hugo's names from the boys. I'm not being racist or sexist, I just literally cannot remember all of them yet. Similarly, I get Fay and Chloe mixed up as they look similar at the moment, but in another few episodes they'll look totally different to each other and I'll know who is who. It’s been a great and healthy discussion. In other news, who's Rachel going to choose?

I can totally understand forgetting people's names, for me anyway my point was more that when the black cast member is the only one who's name is forgotten, it is hard to believe that's just down to chance. I mean hopefully it is, but there is a history of this kind of thing. Plus it's not like her name is complex, it's not even more than one syllable and is a relatively common name in the UK. So I guess, it's situational but in this instance for me it did stand out a bit I guess.

 

[GossWhore]

they were calling Arabella names deliberately to be outright snide though and thinking they were being hilarious. Not quite the same thing as subconscious bias or meaning well but being racist.

Exactly. When I was in college I wasn't as confident so people (I mean white staff/students) would just call me something they could easily remember. I was asked repeatedly if I had a nickname that would be easier so I went by it until uni when i was WHAT THE F WAS I ON. I

Loooove this idea!
I must say, I had a look at Rachel’s Instagram and I love that she isn’t an ‘influencer’ she has I think 8000 followers

She actually had about 195 followers before Love Island.

 

[Lonelylondon]

Wow I just checked again and she

Exactly. When I was in college I wasn't as confident so people (I mean white staff/students) would just call me something they could easily remember. I was asked repeatedly if I had a nickname that would be easier so I went by it until uni when i was WHAT THE F WAS I ON. I

She actually had about 195 followers before Love Island.

Exactly. When I was in college I wasn't as confident so people (I mean white staff/students) would just call me something they could easily remember. I was asked repeatedly if I had a nickname that would be easier so I went by it until uni when i was WHAT THE F WAS I ON. I

She actually had about 195 followers before Love Island.

actually had 11.2k now haha

 

[Doratheexplorer]

As a black woman for all my life I can say you are wrong.

I have been actually told if I wasn't black, men would date me, by men....multiple times which is just sick.

Or you get the ones who just want to fetish you

Or you get the black men aka the Aaron's who don't date BW. No other race has to think ""mmm does he like white/Asian girls"

Dating is tiring, but as a BW is mentally and physically exhausting

Rachel and Kaz are being used for black twitter yes black twitter is real) as they've not been happy with the constant bs on LI. Bet the producers will send one Ched looking guy for them to fight over

I’m sorry you’ve experienced this.

I do disagree with your comment about no other race has to think that though. I have a Chinese friend who experiences the same. She either gets the guys that just want to check it off their checklist of they just aren’t into her at all.

correct me if I’m wrong but I do think I’ve read that we are gentically programmed to be attracted to our own race. I’m white British and I’m generally attracted to white British men (with the exception of Anthony Joshua of course).

I would love if they did different sorts of love island. For example ones with all blacks. Or even one with an older age range (30-40) with people actually interested in finding love and not the fame.

 

[Lonelylondon]

I’m sorry you’ve experienced this.

I do disagree with your comment about no other race has to think that though. I have a Chinese friend who experiences the same. She either gets the guys that just want to check it off their checklist of they just aren’t into her at all.

correct me if I’m wrong but I do think I’ve read that we are gentically programmed to be attracted to our own race. I’m white British and I’m generally attracted to white British men (with the exception of Anthony Joshua of course).

I would love if they did different sorts of love island. For example ones with all blacks. Or even one with an older age range (30-40) with people actually interested in finding love and not the fame.

I don’t think we are ‘naturally’ programmed to be more attracted to our own race, I think it has more to do with our environment, I.e what we are used to seeing. I have a black male friend for example who likes white girls, and I think that is likely because he grew up in a white area, most people at our school were white. If that’s what you’re surrounded by, you are more likely to be steer towards that, if that makes sense. It’s why the media and just society in general can have such an impact on what we are attracted to. Baby girls aren’t just born liking tall dark and handsome men for example haha

 

[jackolantern]

I’m sorry you’ve experienced this.

I do disagree with your comment about no other race has to think that though. I have a Chinese friend who experiences the same. She either gets the guys that just want to check it off their checklist of they just aren’t into her at all.

correct me if I’m wrong but I do think I’ve read that we are gentically programmed to be attracted to our own race. I’m white British and I’m generally attracted to white British men (with the exception of Anthony Joshua of course).

I would love if they did different sorts of love island. For example ones with all blacks. Or even one with an older age range (30-40) with people actually interested in finding love and not the fame.

Is this not just another example of the discussion above, why would you say "all blacks", surely you would say black people? I really don't think you'd say "all whites" as the counter. I mean please do correct me if I'm wrong, but time and time again there just seems to be this recurrent language shift with how we refer to black individuals vs white.

 

[Doratheexplorer]

Is this not just another example of the discussion above, why would you say "all blacks", surely you would say black people? I really don't think you'd say "all whites" as the counter. I mean please do correct me if I'm wrong, but time and time again there just seems to be this recurrent language shift with how we refer to black individuals vs white.

I would actually say all whites, yeah? Or all mixed if I wanted to say that.
Im sorry if anything I say comes across offensive. I really don’t mean it too. I honestly struggle with what’s considered offensive so correct me if it upsets anyone.

 

[Han___]

Deffo this! More about social conditioning not necessarily the same race as yourself (but it normally is). I grew up in a very white community and had hardly ever see another Indian guy that wasn’t family until I got to university. @Doratheexplorer I’m sure your comment is half in jest but I really can’t deal with thirsty non black
Women who drool over AJ when they wouldn’t look twice at him in the street and probably cross the road

I don’t think we are ‘naturally’ programmed to be more attracted to our own race, I think it has more to do with our environment, I.e what we are used to seeing. I have a black male friend for example who likes white girls, and I think that is likely because he grew up in a white area, most people at our school were white. If that’s what you’re surrounded by, you are more likely to be steer towards that, if that makes sense. It’s why the media and just society in general can have such an impact on what we are attracted to. Baby girls aren’t just born liking tall dark and handsome men for example haha

 

[jackolantern]

I would actually say all whites, yeah? Or all mixed if I wanted to say that.
Im sorry if anything I say comes across offensive. I really don’t mean it too. I honestly struggle with what’s considered offensive so correct me if it upsets anyone.

Ok then fair enough. I just find it quite dehumanising but maybe I'm just being overly sensitive on someone else's behalf lol. I feel like as a society we are intent on separating people into different categories instead of just seeing each other as slightly different variants of the same thing. To me "blacks" and "whites" is quite divisive and almost sounds like we see each other as separate species almost if that makes sense? No apology needed anyway, just my opinion you are entitled to say what you wish lol. Definitely poses a load of interesting questions for sure! Language is a tough one.

 

[PurplePie]

Is there no episode tonight?

 

[Doratheexplorer]

Deffo this! More about social conditioning not necessarily the same race as yourself (but it normally is). I grew up in a very white community and had hardly ever see another Indian guy that wasn’t family until I got to university. @Doratheexplorer I’m sure your comment is half in jest but I really can’t deal with thirsty non black
Women who drool over AJ when they wouldn’t look twice at him in the street and probably cross the road

Haha it wasn’t meant in jest. He’s stunning lol. I would never do anything in the street as I’d be too intimidated by how good looking he is lol.

I know it’s the world we live in but it does make me so sad that you presume just because I’m a white woman I would cross the road just because a black man was walking down the road. My mums best friend is a black man, he’s an amazing guy.

 

[Lonelylondon]

Ok then fair enough. I just find it quite dehumanising but maybe I'm just being overly sensitive on someone else's behalf lol. I feel like as a society we are intent on separating people into different categories instead of just seeing each other as slightly different variants of the same thing. To me "blacks" and "whites" is quite divisive and almost sounds like we see each other as separate species almost if that makes sense? No apology needed anyway, just my opinion you are entitled to say what you wish lol. Definitely poses a load of interesting questions for sure! Language is a tough one.

Tbh I think it’s great that we have conversations like this, I actually like watching love island because it brings up a lot of societal topics! Such as this. The lady before said she struggles with knowing what is or isn’t seen as offensive which is fair enough and is why it’s great to have these types of conversations. Anyway, I agree with you, I think referring to black people as ‘blacks’ is quite othering, and segregates them as if they are just all the same, whereas black people just describes who they are.. as in .. people who are black .. I hope I’m explaining myself well.

Is there no episode tonight?

No, I think it’s on Sundays to Fridays

 

[jackolantern]

Tbh I think it’s great that we have conversations like this, I actually like watching love island because it brings up a lot of societal topics! Such as this. The lady before said she struggles with knowing what is or isn’t seen as offensive which is fair enough and is why it’s great to have these types of conversations. Anyway, I agree with you, I think referring to black people as ‘blacks’ is quite othering, and segregates them as if they are just all the same, whereas black people just describes who they are.. as in .. people who are black .. I hope I’m explaining myself well.


No, I think it’s on Sundays to Fridays

Very true on all accounts ❤ If someone called me a 'white' I think I'd thump them one lmfao. I think 9/10 people don't mean any malice and just simply don't know what to say. Especially with this cancel culture we have at the minute. I wish we lived in a world where we were all just described by our names and who we are/represent as people instead of our characteristics, but that's probably expecting far too much lol.

 

[Han___]

Ok, that was also a pretty unfair assumption by me and a stupid generalisation. I deffo have friends like this though and have said it to their faces - both Indian and white friends with AJ infatuation but wouldn’t date a black man in real life. What I like I like about this group is the honest chat without people becoming overly precious. My OG Love Island crush is Jack Fowler! li

Haha it wasn’t meant in jest. He’s stunning lol. I would never do anything in the street as I’d be too intimidated by how good looking he is lol.

I know it’s the world we live in but it does make me so sad that you presume just because I’m a white woman I would cross the road just because a black man was walking down the road. My mums best friend is a black man, he’s an amazing guy.

 

[Doratheexplorer]

Very true on all accounts ❤ If someone called me a 'white' I think I'd thump them one lmfao. I think 9/10 people don't mean any malice and just simply don't know what to say. Especially with this cancel culture we have at the minute. I wish we lived in a world where we were all just described by our names and who we are/represent as people instead of our characteristics, but that's probably expecting far too much lol.

In all honesty if I was talking in person i wouldn’t ever just say blacks, whites. I was typing and didn’t articulate very well what I was trying to put across.

I find it so hard with these conversations, I’m always worried I’m going to upset someone or say something the wrong way

I would never usually suggest segregating people based on skin colour/race for anything but we see it on the current love island as predominantly white British, and I would love to see a direct comparison in another race just to see how different it would be from a viewing perspective.

 

[Blue pumpkin]

Is this not just another example of the discussion above, why would you say "all blacks", surely you would say black people? I really don't think you'd say "all whites" as the counter. I mean please do correct me if I'm wrong, but time and time again there just seems to be this recurrent language shift with how we refer to black individuals vs white.

I could have predicted the response you got back in order to defend themselves using that term

 

[Dont swipe up!]

As much as I love the debate that’s going on this is love island and can we get back to the memes and the contestants
Maybe start a thread for your debate? X

 

[Doratheexplorer]

I could have predicted the response you got back in order to defend themselves using that term

I was typing, didn’t proof read what I wrote and didn’t know it is offensive. I apologise for saying “blacks” I meant black people