Lauren Goodger #60 Lozza The Hutt flogging a cheap hairdryer, Laorse’s diet comes from the deep fat fryer

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Norfolking Good said:
Jesus H on a bendy bus that is sooo professional! I think I’d actually leave if a clinician referred to a floppy fanny. Not to be confused with a prolapse which would be serious 🤨
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That's the point though isn't it? She isn't a clinician, she isn't a medical professional.
She's just another snake-oil salesman willing to tell that fat bleep what she wants to hear for money.

A-Soul said:
LG’s doula.

No words.
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And with a face like Lauren's, her fanny should be floppier than a sedated bulldog's jowls.
 
Strangely I've never seen my dentist or rheumatologist advertising on instagram with stupid songs. I must suggest it to them.

If it needs a filtered fringe and a babyish song to get business , I'd avoid it like the plague.

The only silly song I'd be tempted by is the ice cream van. 🍦
 
behindthesofa said:
That's the point though isn't it? She isn't a clinician, she isn't a medical professional.
She's just another snake-oil salesman willing to tell that fat bleep what she wants to hear for money.



And with a face like Lauren's, her fanny should be floppier than a sedated bulldog's jowls.
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I think you're right. This woman seems like a wannabe midwife without the credentials. In the same category as 'life coach'.
 
Am I having de ja vu? Swear I’ve seen this photo with lozza in her finest silk sheet draped over her before…

48A72F2F-C842-422C-8F43-E12E891F8EA6.png
 
From what I can (quickly) see, a doula cannot perform surgical care, ultrasounds, etc etc.
Yet charges upwards of £600 to provide emotional support.
I'm sure which I would prefer....

Quite telling that laureen doesn't seem to have anyone else to practise breathing, relaxation techniques etc with.

(my nan used to deliver local babies if the midwife couldn't get there in time, which I think is amazing. Apparently she was in high demand. At the opposite end of life she also did laying out.
She was an amazing woman and everything anyone could ask for as a nan, just wonderful).
 
I have a little experience of Doulas, not personally but with someone I knew. We were living abroad at the time in an area where very little English was spoken. Mr SoS had a colleague arrive to work from the UK for a 2 year contract and his wife was about 4-5 months pregnant. She had no immediate living family (parents or sisters) knew no-one English speaking apart from me and this was in the days long before social media and Internet was in its infancy.

Hospitals and the midwives spoke a little English but she was terrified despite trying to learn the language asap! She manage to find a doula, a Dutch lady who spoke excellent English who lived locally and went with her to all her appointments, helped to translate where necessary and helped prepare her for the birth with relaxation techniques and going to antenatal classes with her, go shopping for baby things etc. She stayed with her in the delivery room until the last hour or so before the actual birth and then visited every day sometimes 3x or more to give her support to feed baby, advise on babycare and make sure she was OK in herself for about 4-6 weeks after the birth. I met her a couple of times and she stressed that although she had a nursing and childcare background and qualifications, her role was to take of the mother so she could look after the baby herself. She was NOT a nanny and would never take over the role of the qualified midwife and said that even the most capable and organised women can become very vulnerable when pregnant with no support like family and friends to help which was her main customer base. She had taken many courses in Doula-ing and I've since discovered it's very common to find them abroad and their popularity here is growing.

The Naked Doula (Emma Armstrong) seem to make a living selling flash cards, (she's found a gap in the market - fair play to her if you want to play Snap and Happy Families in labour) but she's based in Nottingham, BYG's OF must be paying well if she can get the lass to travel to Essex! Can't find out much about her or her experience except she's not listed as a recommended Doula on the official website either around Nottingham or Essex.

Doula UK - The non-profit association of doulas in the UK

She seems to be concentrating on a media career and saw this article in the Sun about her. BYG must have seen this and given her ideas for recording content for her OF!

I’m a doula & here are my top tips for a less painful labour - including how using a straw in a drink can help (thesun.co.uk)

1653479551205.png
 
Yes she’s definitely got ideas above her station, that doula. Doulas have their place if required. Doulas who present as healthcare professionals and come out with bollocks as if they are facts, don’t. That woman could seriously duck up a vulnerable new mum with some of the tit she spouts. All pregnant women need to proceed with such care when it comes to their physical and mental health at such a vulnerable time.
 
Silly-old-Slapper said:
I have a little experience of Doulas, not personally but with someone I knew. We were living abroad at the time in an area where very little English was spoken. Mr SoS had a colleague arrive to work from the UK for a 2 year contract and his wife was about 4-5 months pregnant. She had no immediate living family (parents or sisters) knew no-one English speaking apart from me and this was in the days long before social media and Internet was in its infancy.

Hospitals and the midwives spoke a little English but she was terrified despite trying to learn the language asap! She manage to find a doula, a Dutch lady who spoke excellent English who lived locally and went with her to all her appointments, helped to translate where necessary and helped prepare her for the birth with relaxation techniques and going to antenatal classes with her, go shopping for baby things etc. She stayed with her in the delivery room until the last hour or so before the actual birth and then visited every day sometimes 3x or more to give her support to feed baby, advise on babycare and make sure she was OK in herself for about 4-6 weeks after the birth. I met her a couple of times and she stressed that although she had a nursing and childcare background and qualifications, her role was to take of the mother so she could look after the baby herself. She was NOT a nanny and would never take over the role of the qualified midwife and said that even the most capable and organised women can become very vulnerable when pregnant with no support like family and friends to help which was her main customer base. She had taken many courses in Doula-ing and I've since discovered it's very common to find them abroad and their popularity here is growing.

The Naked Doula (Emma Armstrong) seem to make a living selling flash cards, (she's found a gap in the market - fair play to her if you want to play Snap and Happy Families in labour) but she's based in Nottingham, BYG's OF must be paying well if she can get the lass to travel to Essex! Can't find out much about her or her experience except she's not listed as a recommended Doula on the official website either around Nottingham or Essex.

Doula UK - The non-profit association of doulas in the UK

She seems to be concentrating on a media career and saw this article in the Sun about her. BYG must have seen this and given her ideas for recording content for her OF!

I’m a doula & here are my top tips for a less painful labour - including how using a straw in a drink can help (thesun.co.uk)

View attachment 1292936 q
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Big Loz won’t be paying her - she’ll be doing it for free to gain celebrity endorsement I’m sure. As for the orgasm in labour advice, if Chaz is banned from the annexe and LayZspa delivery who exactly is going to be rubbing one out* for Big Loz? Can’t imagine there are any volunteers for that 😂

*I apologise for this crude phrasing and the visual image which did make me sick in my mouth.
 
Silly-old-Slapper said:
I have a little experience of Doulas, not personally but with someone I knew. We were living abroad at the time in an area where very little English was spoken. Mr SoS had a colleague arrive to work from the UK for a 2 year contract and his wife was about 4-5 months pregnant. She had no immediate living family (parents or sisters) knew no-one English speaking apart from me and this was in the days long before social media and Internet was in its infancy.

Hospitals and the midwives spoke a little English but she was terrified despite trying to learn the language asap! She manage to find a doula, a Dutch lady who spoke excellent English who lived locally and went with her to all her appointments, helped to translate where necessary and helped prepare her for the birth with relaxation techniques and going to antenatal classes with her, go shopping for baby things etc. She stayed with her in the delivery room until the last hour or so before the actual birth and then visited every day sometimes 3x or more to give her support to feed baby, advise on babycare and make sure she was OK in herself for about 4-6 weeks after the birth. I met her a couple of times and she stressed that although she had a nursing and childcare background and qualifications, her role was to take of the mother so she could look after the baby herself. She was NOT a nanny and would never take over the role of the qualified midwife and said that even the most capable and organised women can become very vulnerable when pregnant with no support like family and friends to help which was her main customer base. She had taken many courses in Doula-ing and I've since discovered it's very common to find them abroad and their popularity here is growing.

The Naked Doula (Emma Armstrong) seem to make a living selling flash cards, (she's found a gap in the market - fair play to her if you want to play Snap and Happy Families in labour) but she's based in Nottingham, BYG's OF must be paying well if she can get the lass to travel to Essex! Can't find out much about her or her experience except she's not listed as a recommended Doula on the official website either around Nottingham or Essex.

Doula UK - The non-profit association of doulas in the UK

She seems to be concentrating on a media career and saw this article in the Sun about her. BYG must have seen this and given her ideas for recording content for her OF!

I’m a doula & here are my top tips for a less painful labour - including how using a straw in a drink can help (thesun.co.uk)

View attachment 1292936 q
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Inappropriate to just start openly masturbating at the labour ward or even at home when there are staff about who aren’t paid to see that 🤦🏻‍♀️ Most of the ‘orgasmic birth’ stories online are promulgated by male fetishists who sexualise pregnant women. I wonder if she realises
 
Clickbait said:
Big Loz won’t be paying her - she’ll be doing it for free to gain celebrity endorsement I’m sure. As for the orgasm in labour advice, if Chaz is banned from the annexe and LayZspa delivery who exactly is going to be rubbing one out* for Big Loz? Can’t imagine there are any volunteers for that 😂

*I apologise for this crude phrasing and the visual image which did make me sick in my mouth.
Click to expand...

I'm sure Debbiedoola will have an add-on package of extras!
 
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