Jake Quickenden #65 Polly 'Penfold' Parrot is deffo getting Fakey's teeny, tiny carrot!

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Yawn. 😴😴

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My name is fakey and I piss on the floor
Mummy’s said it’s ok don’t do it anymore
I Should be at home with the kids and the wife
But all she does is give me some strife
My anxiety seems to come and go
It’s whenever I get work don’t you know
My Polly pleads everyday for more t.v work
But then they see my insta page and think I’m a berk
I’m only like this as I have nothing to do
My only job daily is having a poo
So everyone you can see my plight
I will keep playing Ra Ra every night
My misses is always pretending she is posh
That’s why I need to bring home the dosh
She tries every day to sell on Vinted
It’s only pennies and we will never be minted
A new day is dawning and another new day
Someone on the phone I hear you say
Blimey it’s another comp just for today
Whatever it is I’ll take it if I may
It’s my excuse to stay away
I will be at the YMCA if you pay
I love my kids and don’t forget the wife
I’m doing it for them for a much better life
Marathon man yes I’m in the zone
What bleeping idiot decided on a bone
I will look like a pratt and everyone will laugh
I’d better get back in my nice warm ice bath
Watch this space as he is all but done
I Hope is mummy is there wiping his bum
Finish or not I’m sure we will know
Lots of stories on his go-pro
For us lucky tattlers we might need to sit down
Whilst reading the stories from this old clown 🤡🤡

Hope you all had a lovely Easter everyone and bye for now 🐣 🐣
 
Vanilla Ice said:
My name is fakey and I piss on the floor
Mummy’s said it’s ok don’t do it anymore
I Should be at home with the kids and the wife
But all she does is give me some strife
My anxiety seems to come and go
It’s whenever I get work don’t you know
My Polly pleads everyday for more t.v work
But then they see my insta page and think I’m a berk
I’m only like this as I have nothing to do
My only job daily is having a poo
So everyone you can see my plight
I will keep playing Ra Ra every night
My misses is always pretending she is posh
That’s why I need to bring home the dosh
She tries every day to sell on Vinted
It’s only pennies and we will never be minted
A new day is dawning and another new day
Someone on the phone I hear you say
Blimey it’s another comp just for today
Whatever it is I’ll take it if I may
It’s my excuse to stay away
I will be at the YMCA if you pay
I love my kids and don’t forget the wife
I’m doing it for them for a much better life
Marathon man yes I’m in the zone
What bleeping idiot decided on a bone
I will look like a pratt and everyone will laugh
I’d better get back in my nice warm ice bath
Watch this space as he is all but done
I Hope is mummy is there wiping his bum
Finish or not I’m sure we will know
Lots of stories on his go-pro
For us lucky tattlers we might need to sit down
Whilst reading the stories from this old clown 🤡🤡

Hope you all had a lovely Easter everyone and bye for now 🐣 🐣
Click to expand...
Absolutely bleeping brilliant 😁😁👍👍👍👍👍👍👍
 
Vanilla Ice said:
My name is fakey and I piss on the floor
Mummy’s said it’s ok don’t do it anymore
I Should be at home with the kids and the wife
But all she does is give me some strife
My anxiety seems to come and go
It’s whenever I get work don’t you know
My Polly pleads everyday for more t.v work
But then they see my insta page and think I’m a berk
I’m only like this as I have nothing to do
My only job daily is having a poo
So everyone you can see my plight
I will keep playing Ra Ra every night
My misses is always pretending she is posh
That’s why I need to bring home the dosh
She tries every day to sell on Vinted
It’s only pennies and we will never be minted
A new day is dawning and another new day
Someone on the phone I hear you say
Blimey it’s another comp just for today
Whatever it is I’ll take it if I may
It’s my excuse to stay away
I will be at the YMCA if you pay
I love my kids and don’t forget the wife
I’m doing it for them for a much better life
Marathon man yes I’m in the zone
What bleeping idiot decided on a bone
I will look like a pratt and everyone will laugh
I’d better get back in my nice warm ice bath
Watch this space as he is all but done
I Hope is mummy is there wiping his bum
Finish or not I’m sure we will know
Lots of stories on his go-pro
For us lucky tattlers we might need to sit down
Whilst reading the stories from this old clown 🤡🤡

Hope you all had a lovely Easter everyone and bye for now 🐣 🐣
Click to expand...
Love it! It's proper peng this! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
 
Vanilla Ice said:
My name is fakey and I piss on the floor
Mummy’s said it’s ok don’t do it anymore
I Should be at home with the kids and the wife
But all she does is give me some strife
My anxiety seems to come and go
It’s whenever I get work don’t you know
My Polly pleads everyday for more t.v work
But then they see my insta page and think I’m a berk
I’m only like this as I have nothing to do
My only job daily is having a poo
So everyone you can see my plight
I will keep playing Ra Ra every night
My misses is always pretending she is posh
That’s why I need to bring home the dosh
She tries every day to sell on Vinted
It’s only pennies and we will never be minted
A new day is dawning and another new day
Someone on the phone I hear you say
Blimey it’s another comp just for today
Whatever it is I’ll take it if I may
It’s my excuse to stay away
I will be at the YMCA if you pay
I love my kids and don’t forget the wife
I’m doing it for them for a much better life
Marathon man yes I’m in the zone
What bleeping idiot decided on a bone
I will look like a pratt and everyone will laugh
I’d better get back in my nice warm ice bath
Watch this space as he is all but done
I Hope is mummy is there wiping his bum
Finish or not I’m sure we will know
Lots of stories on his go-pro
For us lucky tattlers we might need to sit down
Whilst reading the stories from this old clown 🤡🤡

Hope you all had a lovely Easter everyone and bye for now 🐣 🐣
Click to expand...
Wicked BRO 👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽👍🏽
 
Vanilla Ice said:
My name is fakey and I piss on the floor
Mummy’s said it’s ok don’t do it anymore
I Should be at home with the kids and the wife
But all she does is give me some strife
My anxiety seems to come and go
It’s whenever I get work don’t you know
My Polly pleads everyday for more t.v work
But then they see my insta page and think I’m a berk
I’m only like this as I have nothing to do
My only job daily is having a poo
So everyone you can see my plight
I will keep playing Ra Ra every night
My misses is always pretending she is posh
That’s why I need to bring home the dosh
She tries every day to sell on Vinted
It’s only pennies and we will never be minted
A new day is dawning and another new day
Someone on the phone I hear you say
Blimey it’s another comp just for today
Whatever it is I’ll take it if I may
It’s my excuse to stay away
I will be at the YMCA if you pay
I love my kids and don’t forget the wife
I’m doing it for them for a much better life
Marathon man yes I’m in the zone
What bleeping idiot decided on a bone
I will look like a pratt and everyone will laugh
I’d better get back in my nice warm ice bath
Watch this space as he is all but done
I Hope is mummy is there wiping his bum
Finish or not I’m sure we will know
Lots of stories on his go-pro
For us lucky tattlers we might need to sit down
Whilst reading the stories from this old clown 🤡🤡

Hope you all had a lovely Easter everyone and bye for now 🐣 🐣
Click to expand...
Crying 😂😂 think this is my favourite one you’ve done
 
Been down a rabbit hole with this one tonight...his low hanging balls have scarred me for life. Years ago I worked in a care home and there was this old man resident in his 80's (called Jacob) who would ask the lasses who bathed him to pay special attention to his balls , he reckoned because they hung so low a build up of filth would collect behind them. (so sorry to share).

Anyhoo I love you lot ripping him a new hole everyday : ) Nowt get's by you xxx

Pic of Zelda at the x-factor saying to him "don't look at the audience " "stop texting let me hold your phone" .
 

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Just caught up and seen Flappys hair ‘ad’ for yesterday. How many brands and products has she now used for her hair that are so fantastic 🙄 Apart from the normal lick arses on her post, a few are saying about how the product isn’t good and how expensive it is. Wonder how long before she removes them comments 🤷🏻‍♀️ Also I think that when she’s saying these are ‘ads’ they’re actually not but just good old affiliated links. She thinks it looks better to say the word ad than aff link but there must be a reason why she always tries to hide the word ‘ad’ on her stories? Anyone with over a certain amount of followers can message a brand and get a discount code and I think that’s what she is doing. I don’t think she gets paid to advertise that. Her payment is the free products they send her and the commission she makes off the aff links. I maybe totally wrong but that is my thought process and I’m sticking with it 😂😂😂
 
I noticed it’s had bad reviews and she’s just so desperate for money will flog any 💩.Are the idiots of to lego land as not raining today he’s already done at least four stories so boring.Flaps picture of Fred topless just no need and have some respect as a mother not to keep exploiting your children 😡
 
Morning, just forced myself to watch old jaundice and the “wolf” story, WTAF was that all about?? Since when did she gets nightmares?? She’s a very strange woman and needs to get off instagram she is only embarrassing herself 🙈 Was she reading from her notebook when trying to flog those towels?? Christ almighty if that was my mother I’d be embarrassed and take the IPad from her, can she not spend her time seeing her grandchildren, maybe give her grandson a birthday shout out , actually maybe go see him on his birthday in person and give him a cuddle and a present FFS like a normal grandmother, just so odd?? Her content is terrible 😴🥱🥱🥱 her twit son and his giant rat story and her and the wolf story 😂 it’s not even funny, I mean they just sound like bigger twats 😂 How could you not be embarrassed ??? Does Soldier Simon make spelling mistakes on purpose for attention or is he just really bad at spelling? “Imagine me loving here”, we know you mean living and were trying to get at tattle 😂 I mean he’s just making himself look like a bigger twit, his granny fans 👵🏻 will soon get fed up, and they are hardly interested in some tit MMA fight, his content is desperate just like his spelling. Anyway moving on, is he playing dressing up as a RaRa in Butlins again this week 🤭
 

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