Jack Monroe #71 Jack flew over the cuckoo’s nest

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Marmalade Atkins said:
There is a photo preview of the lyrics to the Onion Chopping Song...


The easiest way to chop an onion
Is to chop it really neatly in two
Then you can just strip off the skin
And you can get stuck in
It makes it really simple for you

Oh the ...
Is to make sure your knife is really sharp
Start off slow and steady


(this isn't a joke)

😬
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Saint_clemmie said:
I’m not sure she did though, she kept mentioning having a “nice man in her ear” via the air pods (that weren’t hers) that she dropped in something she was cooking, live! Also @heretoreaditall2019 swears she heard another voice through her own fancy headphones.
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My Monroe moment having those headphones, but there was 100% someone else in that house. They’re Bose headphones (fancy!) and I could hear someone breathing (chilling!) whilst she was talking. Asked husband to confirm I wasn’t just having a stroke. This was a few episodes in, I suspect Hellman’s sent someone round to attempt to claw back their tens of thousands of pounds spent but couldn’t say anything as it was breaking lockdown rules at the time?

Also on secret thread comedians (it’s... Frankie Boyle’s account?) I always thought Saturn was Joe Lycett 😂
 
Uberrima fides said:
Are you going to do an unplugged as well as an electric version of this modern day classic?😛 You could get JM to appear in the promotional video. No, wait, she would want a hefty fee for that.
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I was thinking of doing a Pirate Metal cover. Dancing pirates using their cutlass skills to chop onions ( I've just been watching Eurovision 2008)

And the ingenious thing about my song is, if you don't have any onions you can substitute any fruit or vegetable (with two syllables)
 
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heretoreaditall2019 said:
My Monroe moment having those headphones, but there was 100% someone else in that house. They’re Bose headphones (fancy!) and I could hear someone breathing (chilling!) whilst she was talking. Asked husband to confirm I wasn’t just having a stroke. This was a few episodes in, I suspect Hellman’s sent someone round to attempt to claw back their tens of thousands of pounds spent but couldn’t say anything as it was breaking lockdown rules at the time?
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You're not having a stroke. I definitely heard someone too. Pretty sure it was another woman, and JM trilled 'love youuuuu!', soooooo I'm gonna say it's not someone from Hellman's (unless a potential Mrs J??). I reckon Jack just had someone over, and I suspect she hasn't given a duck about lockdown rules the entire pandemic given the hints she's dropped throughout :rolleyes:
 
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