Jack Monroe #586 She can only but dream of being a lyrical dance flap

Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
1
Valiofthedolls said:
It’s way TOO LATE, but a cake is like a bag, except you put things on it not in it would make an excellent thread title.

*exception to the above: when you put a USB port in a cheap chocolate pear cake meat-cakeView attachment 3119505 qView attachment 3119506 qEdit: if anyone wants to relive the horror/ineptitude, here it is courtesy of @Yel who bravely immortalized the many horrors of Sloppy Savers
Click to expand...
Shant
 
Valiofthedolls said:
View attachment 3119669 qView attachment 3119670 q
She’s so absolutely full of tit with her fingerprint smudged shop-bought Old Testament demon cake she “made with marmalade”, it’s no wonder her eyes are brown.
Click to expand...
Wait, wtf, who is replacing our @Marmalade Atkins with a fkn egg? I am not having that.

Time to riot, Canal. Streets, now, out in force. Bring slop to throw. Or any salad you were planning to make pesto with. Or a tin you can't open cos Grifty Kitchen has been banned.

Come for one of us, you come for all. Right???!
 
Potatoes O’Houlihan said:
In case anyone can be arsed, Carp Man is still on a mission and has given a quite lengthy 1* review to the entity that he listed his flat with 👀

(Edit: review is on TrustPilot)
Click to expand...
Courtesy of @Yel shall we just have Jack making a 0* fishy 🐟 salmon paste slop on Not-Lorraine instead?

jack-monroe-salmon-paste-noodles.mp4

No comment.
tattle.life
Or a peach curry? (Scroll to about 55 seconds in to wait for the hot pan sizzling sounds added in post-production)
Or a sloppity ploppity stewed steak Meaty Bean Goulash (and minging nails)
And for an un-amuse bouche, the USB Meat Brick again (the USB, it transpires, is because the useless twit didn’t blend it properly)
 
Valiofthedolls said:
@Marmalade Atkins has some nice collages for that. ❤View attachment 3119845 qView attachment 3119847 qView attachment 3119848 qFilthy-Fingernailed Bloated Adenoidal Greasy Grubby Sloppy Savers (Allegedly sober) Jack was April 2022
View attachment 3119882 q
Just as a reminder, this was what Jack claimed she looked like in April 2022.
ss @heretoreaditall2019 View attachment 3119866 qView attachment 3119867 qbleeping tragic needy lying attention-seeking talentless fantasist.
Click to expand...
Tell me you have been out on the lash, without telling me you have been out on the lash! She looks hungover to duck!
 
Onestorytoomany said:
Tell me you have been out on the lash, without telling me you have been out on the lash! She looks hungover to duck!
Click to expand...
Got fuzzy on the timeline for this interview and was curious if Sloppy Savers was filmed close to here with James O’Brien when she was absolutely off her bleeping chump, slurring and talking even more bollox than usual. Sloppy Savers was filmed about 2-ish months later.

If you can’t face the whole thing, @Yel saved the bit where she’s slurring and hooting maniacally about apples getting smaller.

Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork

What would her costume be? A peg? A massive schnozz?
tattle.life
IMG_4623.jpeg
Screenshot with date. Five months after that interview and three months after Sloppy Savers, she’d (she claims) been sober for a year as evidenced by no longer being the benighted love child of Benny from Crossroads/Rose West but instead living a Parklife beyond her wildest dreams as a trendy mod Going Underground in A Town Called Malice Thorpe Bay.
IMG_4622.jpeg
Apart from the time 10-11 days before her wildest dreams when she’d been dumped with her stupid-ass suitcase and was heartbroken and outpouring grief
IMG_4624.jpeg
and the time two days before wildest dreams when she was trying to marry someone after talking to them on Tinder for about 30 seconds.
IMG_4625.jpeg
ETA: Ugh, am so glad she’s (mostly) shut the duck up these days, tho feel sorry for the poor real life buggers she’s incessantly attention-seeking from and sucking the life out of to get her narc supply.
 
Last edited:
Valiofthedolls said:
Got fuzzy on the timeline for this interview and was curious if Sloppy Savers was filmed close to here with James O’Brien when she was absolutely off her bleeping chump, slurring and talking even more bollox than usual. Sloppy Savers was filmed about 2-ish months later.

If you can’t face the whole thing, @Yel saved the bit where she’s slurring and hooting maniacally about apples getting smaller.

Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork

What would her costume be? A peg? A massive schnozz?
tattle.life
View attachment 3119949 qScreenshot with date. Five months after that interview and three months after Sloppy Savers, she’d (she claims) been sober for a year as evidenced by no longer being the benighted love child of Benny from Crossroads/Rose West but instead living a Parklife beyond her wildest dreams as a trendy mod Going Underground in A Town Called Malice Thorpe Bay. View attachment 3119950 q
Apart from the time 10-11 days before her wildest dreams when she’d been dumped with her stupid-ass suitcase and was heartbroken and outpouring grief View attachment 3119955 qand the time two days before wildest dreams when she was trying to marry someone after talking to them on Tinder for about 30 seconds. View attachment 3119956 q
ETA: Ugh, am so glad she’s (mostly) shut the duck up these days, tho feel sorry for the poor real life buggers she’s incessantly attention-seeking from and sucking the life out of to get her narc supply.
Click to expand...

That interview was a disgrace which is why I really can’t stand JOB. she sounds like me when I am drunk and trying to speak to my parents on the phone and trying to sound like I am definitely not drunk but she gets worse and worse throughout. Even if she wasn’t off her face she sounds very upset and he is just sitting there letting her go on and on.
 
Valiofthedolls said:
Got fuzzy on the timeline for this interview and was curious if Sloppy Savers was filmed close to here with James O’Brien when she was absolutely off her bleeping chump, slurring and talking even more bollox than usual. Sloppy Savers was filmed about 2-ish months later.

If you can’t face the whole thing, @Yel saved the bit where she’s slurring and hooting maniacally about apples getting smaller.

Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork

What would her costume be? A peg? A massive schnozz?
tattle.life
View attachment 3119949 qScreenshot with date. Five months after that interview and three months after Sloppy Savers, she’d (she claims) been sober for a year as evidenced by no longer being the benighted love child of Benny from Crossroads/Rose West but instead living a Parklife beyond her wildest dreams as a trendy mod Going Underground in A Town Called Malice Thorpe Bay. View attachment 3119950 q
Apart from the time 10-11 days before her wildest dreams when she’d been dumped with her stupid-ass suitcase and was heartbroken and outpouring grief View attachment 3119955 qand the time two days before wildest dreams when she was trying to marry someone after talking to them on Tinder for about 30 seconds. View attachment 3119956 q
ETA: Ugh, am so glad she’s (mostly) shut the duck up these days, tho feel sorry for the poor real life buggers she’s incessantly attention-seeking from and sucking the life out of to get her narc supply.
Click to expand...


Urghhh that voice.
 
Valiofthedolls said:
Got fuzzy on the timeline for this interview and was curious if Sloppy Savers was filmed close to here with James O’Brien when she was absolutely off her bleeping chump, slurring and talking even more bollox than usual. Sloppy Savers was filmed about 2-ish months later.

If you can’t face the whole thing, @Yel saved the bit where she’s slurring and hooting maniacally about apples getting smaller.

Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork

What would her costume be? A peg? A massive schnozz?
tattle.life
View attachment 3119949 qScreenshot with date. Five months after that interview and three months after Sloppy Savers, she’d (she claims) been sober for a year as evidenced by no longer being the benighted love child of Benny from Crossroads/Rose West but instead living a Parklife beyond her wildest dreams as a trendy mod Going Underground in A Town Called Malice Thorpe Bay. View attachment 3119950 q
Apart from the time 10-11 days before her wildest dreams when she’d been dumped with her stupid-ass suitcase and was heartbroken and outpouring grief and the time two days before wildest dreams when she was trying to marry someone after talking to them on Tinder for about 30 seconds.
ETA: Ugh, am so glad she’s (mostly) shut the duck up these days, tho feel sorry for the poor real life buggers she’s incessantly attention-seeking from and sucking the life out of to get her narc supply.
Click to expand...


bleeping lol, only just noticed the two different watches!
 
PamTax said:
She’s completely c*nted in that interview. Does anyone have audio of when she appeared on BBC radio Scotland a couple of months later sounding in a similar state? (Approx 2 hours late, of course)
Click to expand...
That recording is lost to the mists of time, sadly.
IMG_4637.jpeg

Here in the threads is where she (finally) showed up honking and sniffing her usual complete and utter crap, if you’d like to relive it honk’n’sniff post nasal drip free by reading the canal commentary.

Jack Monroe #407 I lost hours yesterday learning about a Jack Monroe

Podiatry slot now finished Still saying she's coming on soon 'live'
tattle.life
For the far more enjoyable Radio Scotland toenail fungus chat that preceded guest honking a load of old shite while off her face, just click the link and then go back a few pages
 
Grifty Mc said:
That interview was a disgrace which is why I really can’t stand JOB. she sounds like me when I am drunk and trying to speak to my parents on the phone and trying to sound like I am definitely not drunk but she gets worse and worse throughout. Even if she wasn’t off her face she sounds very upset and he is just sitting there letting her go on and on.
Click to expand...
The way he scratches and pulls at his manky patchy beard :sick:
I'll never get her point here either and am still amazed it gathered traction. To the tune of 10k in one month thanks to Nigella bleeping Lawson. Cheap stockcubes went up from 10p to 40p. But a Charlie Bighams £7 lasagne stayed the same price. One product was wildly underpriced and one wasn't. That literally seems to be it. Off the back of this incoherent bollocks she promised the VBI.
 
Grifty Mc said:
I can’t believe she got away with this for years when people had twigged on to her in 2015

View attachment 3119707 q
Click to expand...

Wait a minute. What happened to MSC certified fish when she was challenged on the CHEAP salmon from the "chiller" at the local supermarket? She claimed to know nothing of fish welfare. I do hope this doesn't mean she is a liar and a fraud.
 
Seaford Haggington said:
Wait a minute. What happened to MSC certified fish when she was challenged on the CHEAP salmon from the "chiller" at the local supermarket? She claimed to know nothing of fish welfare. I do hope this doesn't mean she is a liar and a fraud.
Click to expand...

And yet her "£20, still" performative weekly shop, which she has perfected over years with her notebooks and stock takes, contains cheap bacon and frozen bollock sausages as the meat source.. 🫠
 
MavisBeacon said:
And yet her "£20, still" performative weekly shop, which she has perfected over years with her notebooks and stock takes, contains cheap bacon and frozen bollock sausages as the meat source.. 🫠
Click to expand...
So all this performance of ‘prices are going up for the poorest in society’ … and yet…. ‘£20 still’
Pick a lane love (gusset, not you dear tender @MavisBeacon )
 
Valiofthedolls said:
Got fuzzy on the timeline for this interview and was curious if Sloppy Savers was filmed close to here with James O’Brien when she was absolutely off her bleeping chump, slurring and talking even more bollox than usual. Sloppy Savers was filmed about 2-ish months later.

If you can’t face the whole thing, @Yel saved the bit where she’s slurring and hooting maniacally about apples getting smaller.

Jack Monroe #553 Fairytale of No Pork

What would her costume be? A peg? A massive schnozz?
tattle.life
View attachment 3119949 qScreenshot with date. Five months after that interview and three months after Sloppy Savers, she’d (she claims) been sober for a year as evidenced by no longer being the benighted love child of Benny from Crossroads/Rose West but instead living a Parklife beyond her wildest dreams as a trendy mod Going Underground in A Town Called Malice Thorpe Bay. View attachment 3119950 q
Apart from the time 10-11 days before her wildest dreams when she’d been dumped with her stupid-ass suitcase and was heartbroken and outpouring grief View attachment 3119955 qand the time two days before wildest dreams when she was trying to marry someone after talking to them on Tinder for about 30 seconds. View attachment 3119956 q
ETA: Ugh, am so glad she’s (mostly) shut the duck up these days, tho feel sorry for the poor real life buggers she’s incessantly attention-seeking from and sucking the life out of to get her narc supply.
Click to expand...

Her deactivating for a whole 26 hours to stop the outpouring of grief at Dordrecht being the last straw for poor Harold will never not be funny
 
Status
Thread locked. We start a new thread when they have over 1000 posts, click the blue button to see all threads for this topic and find the latest open thread.
Back
Top