Jack Monroe #563 Danniella Guestbrook

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Valiofthedolls said:
Ummmm, guest 🙋🏼‍♀️

If you weren’t allowed to have a phone until you were 16, when you were allowed a 3310…
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If you were 16 and allowed to have it, why (in the same article) did you have to then hide that phone under your pillow in your errant youth?
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Was it because your Somalian and Italian flatmates were, like, REALLY strict? View attachment 2719528 q

Also, calling @traumatised sideboard
From the time Jack gave up her smartphone and CHANGED HER LIFE.
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my exodus from Facebook. Moses didn’t part the Red Sea to let you out of there, did he? Use a dictionary you book token-bothering bleeping moron, not a thesaurus. View attachment 2719555 q
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In fairness Vali, there are A LOT of Jacks.
 
Hold up. She’s ’hanging out’ every day for two years with this friend? Two and a half hour games of chess? How? In between the 3hr school runs, the recipe testing, final final final book edits, 25000 steps, yomping to Asda with a trolley, post office runs, sideboard purchasing, etc, just how? Oh hang on. It’s lies, isn’t it 🤦‍♂️

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Lucky Escape said:
And she completely ignores the group that does behave like that - people who are a bit more secure financially, and who picked up some random bits and pieces not because they were needed but because they were bargains. It baffles me that she's never targetted either those people, or the closely-related "comfortably off but want to save money" crowd. The financial equivalent of the "worried well" that public health people like to talk about.

They'd have been a much better fit for her. They'd have been much more likely to shell out £20 or so for a glossy book filled with instructions for making firepit lighters from saved sardine oil mixed with cashmere fluff, for a start. And if turned out that her recipes still didn't work, it would be less of a loss for them than it would be for the imaginary Dickensian urchins that Jack seems to think she's helping.
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It does seem odd that in this much-talked-about Cost of Living Crisis nobody from the media's thought "Let's call up the great Jack Monroe, who does ninepence meals, and let her do so much good for everyone who's struggling." I think what might have happened is that the suggestion has occasionally been made but then some other media person has said "oh, don't be daft, she makes disgusting slops for people who wear tracksuits, you can tell just from the name of her recipes that they're horrible, we can't inflict that on normal people." A "slop for thee, but not for me" situation, perhaps. Nobody who praised and admired her ever expected that they would have to consume the nonsense she calls 'food.' It's always been assumed that someone lower down the ladder - someone less important - is going to benefit from them, but the mere fact that most of her published efforts don't even make the meals they claim to shows nobody promoting her wanted to try them for themselves.
 
Lucky Escape said:
I do see what you mean, but I think that's largely opportunistic behaviour on her part rather than the result of any great plan.

Not because she's unintelligent, but because she has never shown herself to have the level of stamina that would be required, or the ability to follow through.

I think she's sneaky and self-serving, and is willing to debase herself in the pursuit of short-term gratification. But I don't think she's any sort of criminal mastermind.
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As with everything she shows basic promise but is let down by her laziness, impulsiveness and sheer ignorance 😂
 
Not to mention the entire can of hairspray she's used - it's probably opened up another hole in the ozone layer.

I got round to watching Saltburn earlier. Jack has far too many similarities with Ollie Quick. Lying, envy, class preoccupation, slavishly wanting to be other people she's been around, glomming on to people very quickly and even the dining room nudity.
 
hereforthechaos said:
So called food expert does not know the difference between stout and bitter. All canned alcohols are interchangeable apparently. What a twit.
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She did have a go at being a BEER EXPERT in an unctuous pie recipe, but she’s very stupid so instead of talking about mouthfeel, she came out with this instead.
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She also has a TERRIBLE go at being sensuous Nigella Jack, then Mrs Bennet,
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also goes a bit Goody Monroe of Salem’s Lentils, goes for a quick sweep past Dante’s Inferno, and employs the phrases greedy gullet, rough chunky paste and thick white scum. It’s quite the wild ride.

Jack Monroe #489 Come Sun Or Haze, You've Got CCJs

I swear that this woman is insane I love how this crappy video fucks up multiple phones every time it's posted 😂
tattle.life
 
If her ma is like any of the northern irish ladies i know, she would definately tell her, espcially if it was your own daughter. My ma could and can be brutal! 🤣and her response to us being offended or mollied is. 'Who would you rather thell ya, me?! Or someone down the street by not sitting near ya and calling you sweaty betty.

The bleeping tights things makes wanna hurl, i aint gonna lie. My worry is if she is this minging, what digusting habits does sb thinks accetable( poor Kid) by her example. My kids have been taught since they were tiny to not be minging. Clean clothes everyday and washing etc.
 
Onestorytoomany said:
If her ma is like any of the northern irish ladies i know, she would definately tell her, espcially if it was your own daughter. My ma could and can be brutal! 🤣and her response to us being offended or mollied is. 'Who would you rather thell ya, me?! Or someone down the street by not sitting near ya and calling you sweaty betty.

The bleeping tights things makes wanna hurl, i aint gonna lie. My worry is if she is this minging, what digusting habits does sb thinks accetable( poor Kid) by her example. My kids have been taught since they were tiny to not be minging. Clean clothes everyday and washing etc.
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She mops her floors with rancid washing machine water, so I dread to think what else she gets up to.
 
Onestorytoomany said:
If her ma is like any of the northern irish ladies i know, she would definately tell her, espcially if it was your own daughter. My ma could and can be brutal! 🤣and her response to us being offended or mollied is. 'Who would you rather thell ya, me?! Or someone down the street by not sitting near ya and calling you sweaty betty.

The bleeping tights things makes wanna hurl, i aint gonna lie. My worry is if she is this minging, what digusting habits does sb thinks accetable( poor Kid) by her example. My kids have been taught since they were tiny to not be minging. Clean clothes everyday and washing etc.
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Right? My kids are messy eaters and averse to hair washing but we have rules!!
 
Witchfinder Sargeant said:
I use a recipe/meal planning/shopping list app.

Sunday morning:
  1. Open app, open calendar on phone
  2. look at week ahead (evening events? lunch out with work? away over the weekend?)
  3. Breakfast is the same thing every day for a week because duck thinking before I've had my coffee. Drop breakfast meal into the right place on the app.
  4. Lunch is last night's leftovers because it's easier to cook for two than it is for one
  5. Dinner is beef or pork on Sunday, vegetarian or vegan on Monday, chicken on Tuesday, fish on Wednesday, vegetarian or vegan on Thursday, fish on Friday, chicken on Saturday if I'm at home for the weekend, if I'm at my partner's he does the catering. I try and do one bulk cook a week and freeze it.
  6. Filter by the various options in the recipe part of the app, drag and drop into the right sections of the day, log the leftovers for lunch.
  7. Go to the shopping list section. Delete the stuff I know I have, check the stuff I'm not sure about, add things like coffee, tonic water, etc.
  8. Cycle to the supermarket.
  9. Buy shopping.
  10. Cycle home.
I think, all in, including cycling to the shop, going round the shop, and cycling home, it's an hour and a half, tops?
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Rice with what now? She really does hate food and has no idea how it works.

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Can I ask which app you use tenderstem?
 
That mahogany wood varnish tinted coconut shy head of hers will never not be ridiculous
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Why does she so often insist on looking like she’s wearing a hat made out of her own hair? There’s the coconut shy,
The Plum Passion/Autumn Flame Busby
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The Back to Front 1980s Girl Guides Hat
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The It Ain’t Half Hot, Mum Beret
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Honorable mention for all the other times she’s looked like her hair is not growing out of her head, but instead sat on top of it
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