Jack Monroe #559 Untitled Jack Monroe Memoir

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My quarterhack fell apart when I found a sachet of Lyft Lemon Tea BB Aug 1996 at the back of the cupboard and couldn't decide which column to put it in. Scrunched up neatly ruled A4 representing 40 minutes work and put it in the bin. Now I have 74 tins of chopped tomatoes and no milk so who's the hole?

That's rhetorical. Still guest.

ETA in case there any who haven't seen it, there's a stocktake of her cupboards & freezers showing hundreds of pounds worth of food "in stock". Freezer stuffed with salmon and monkfish tails. This is the bastard who is weeping inconsolably in Asda if someone beats her to the 5p yellow sticker mushrooms.
 
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I keep a piece of paper and a pen in the kitchen. When I finish something I write it down. Once a week I do a meal plan and add anything to the list that I don’t already have.

She’s very obviously either ❄, got too much time on her hands, being paid to solve a non-existent problem or thick as mince (protein). Or all of these.
 
She has lied so much and so inconsistently. If she had ever lived without a fridge (she hasn't), and been poor (she hasn't), she would know how vital it is to keep absolutely on top of what you have, what MUST be eaten before it goes off, what you can afford, and how important it is to meal plan so you and yours don't suffer malnutrition.

As with all things guest, she is bleeping clueless and has bordering on zero lived experience of anything she says and does, or says she does.

I hope 2024 is the year that many, many people start to realise just how full our world is of LIES.
 
YerDa said:
She’s very obviously either ❄, got too much time on her hands, being paid to solve a non-existent problem or thick as mince (protein). Or all of these.
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BIB thread title nomination please!

On a serious note, I’m not sure if this has already been mithered about or not, but it appears that under new world-wide regs platforms such as eBay, Etsy, Vinted, AirBnB and Uber now have to automatically report pre-fee earnings of around £1700+ and/or 30 sales (if items purchased to trade) to HMRC. If this also covers Patreon and Kofi, that could be a few peeps on the hellsite running scared - not just guest, but I’ll take bets that Supertanskiiiiiiii hasn’t declared to the taxman either. They have until the end of this month to self-declare. Tick tock…
 
moldwarp said:
Yes, it's pointless busywork, but also, it's something that someone in the grip of a snowstorm would think was an incredibly meaningful, important and absorbing thing to do.
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It's a bit like when you have your first bong when you're a teenager and think you have cracked the answers to the mysteries of the universe whilst off your tits, then in the cold light of day realise it was all bollocks. The party never stops in the bungamansion though.
 
Last year the DWP decided I wasn't dying quickly enough and stopped my PIP which had knock on effects to all my other benefits and my income dropped by around a grand a month, I have 2 dependents. I was SKINT, I mean really skint, skintness I hadn't known since sitting in the dark eating cereal with warm flakey milk when my dad was out of work in the 90s. I've always been good at budgeting and living on little thanks to my poverty apprenticeship in the 90s, I needed tips that went beyond "buy own brand" (that bbc1 prog with gregg wallace drives me mad) and despite knowing Jack was unhinged, when I saw an article with her latest money saving tip I raced to it to find the bleeping quarter hack, I genuinely couldn't work out if I'd misunderstood it, there had to be more to it than 'list what you already have in a convoluted way '? I read it a number of times over a few days. Concluded she'd run out of ideas and was trying to cling to her position of chief povvo!
Ps I went to tribunal and got my PIP back, DWP are cruel cruel fucks
 
Don'tlookEthel said:
Last year the DWP decided I wasn't dying quickly enough and stopped my PIP which had knock on effects to all my other benefits and my income dropped by around a grand a month, I have 2 dependents. I was SKINT, I mean really skint, skintness I hadn't known since sitting in the dark eating cereal with warm flakey milk when my dad was out of work in the 90s. I've always been good at budgeting and living on little thanks to my poverty apprenticeship in the 90s, I needed tips that went beyond "buy own brand" (that bbc1 prog with gregg wallace drives me mad) and despite knowing Jack was unhinged, when I saw an article with her latest money saving tip I raced to it to find the bleeping quarter hack, I genuinely couldn't work out if I'd misunderstood it, there had to be more to it than 'list what you already have in a convoluted way '? I read it a number of times over a few days. Concluded she'd run out of ideas and was trying to cling to her position of chief povvo!
Ps I went to tribunal and got my PIP back, DWP are cruel cruel fucks
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Glad that all worked out for you. Her money saving tips are more dangerous than her ktichen hacks... Because when i was skint, I was proper not arsed if my eggs were round.
 
chizontiz said:
I also hate how much of a dick she is about ready meals. Ready meals are great! Long live chicken arrabiata!
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This has always baffled me about her (amongst many many other things).
As a chronic illness frau, ready meals, packets of cooked rice, pot noodles etc are essential to have in the cupboard for the eventual flares. As she claims to be chronically ill too she never mentions this, or ingredients for people with disabilities, which she also claims to be.
 
It’s like going out to buy a new chair but writing down a list of all the furniture I already have.

Personally I write down what I need, use my maverick brain to think what do I need to use up. Think if any of the things I’m buying are short life and need using quickly so put them in the plan. I then go and shake the cereal to see how we are doing.
 
Don'tlookEthel said:
Last year the DWP decided I wasn't dying quickly enough and stopped my PIP which had knock on effects to all my other benefits and my income dropped by around a grand a month, I have 2 dependents. I was SKINT, I mean really skint, skintness I hadn't known since sitting in the dark eating cereal with warm flakey milk when my dad was out of work in the 90s. I've always been good at budgeting and living on little thanks to my poverty apprenticeship in the 90s, I needed tips that went beyond "buy own brand" (that bbc1 prog with gregg wallace drives me mad) and despite knowing Jack was unhinged, when I saw an article with her latest money saving tip I raced to it to find the bleeping quarter hack, I genuinely couldn't work out if I'd misunderstood it, there had to be more to it than 'list what you already have in a convoluted way '? I read it a number of times over a few days. Concluded she'd run out of ideas and was trying to cling to her position of chief povvo!
Ps I went to tribunal and got my PIP back, DWP are cruel cruel fucks
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So sorry you had to go through that DWP nightmare, tenderstem. I've been through similar with them and I know how utterly tit it is.

It sucks that a crook like Jack managed to peddle her nonsensical guff for so long, while people genuinely struggling were gaslighted into thinking she had something to offer. It really pisses me off to think that people might've spent money they couldn't afford buying her books or trying out recipes that didn't work. And that people on low incomes might've sent her a few quid in response to her begging online, only because they believed she was also in poverty.
 
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