Jack Monroe #256 The Da Vinci Code is easier to solve than her timeline

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Jack has gone from lights out so depressed she couldn't eat, to lights on Chinese takaway, going out to a vegan restaurant, singing along to songs from a musical based around the aftermath of terrorist atrocity.

It's as if Jack has no idea what depression is. It appears that our smol pixie thinks depression is being fed up because something isn't going your way.
 
LavaFlake said:
Looks like a promo shot for the new ITV crime drama The Butcher.
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The Thorpe Bay Butcher, starring Jaime Winstone as a smol bullied pixie who finally SNAPS, mercilessly slaying her many mithering enemies with a rusty breadknife.

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Veronicaaa said:
These people are so smug. "Once lived in poverty" - oh you mean that time ten years ago when she quit her £27k per annum job that her daddy got her in order to claim benefits and go to the foodbank once which Jack has now managed to parlay into a career as speaking for the poors, which includes a recent front page spread about how people are going to DIE and saying she's got £37 in the bank and wanging on on the radio about how she lives in one of the most deprived constituencies in the country and isn't well off by any means? Then a mere couple of weeks later posting about using the money from her neverending begging bowl for tattoos? Yeah good one.

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Not to mention the entire point of her getting another tattoo was to annoy someone who finds then distasteful - an opinion which when held publicly is most likely based on an association between tattoos and the working class!
 
Anyhow, I am with those that think the Valerie Barlow Index will appear. But it will be the work of everyone else Jack has managed to rope in, and will be a load of old hyperbolic nonsense and easily disproved lies.

I expect all her loyal followers (Jackolites? Jackomites? Jack-ets?) will be lauding her and saying it is the best indicator of inflation EVER. It will appear in all the media, she will appear as a talking head on every TV channel (except Channel 4) and Jack will be the darling of the moment.

A few days later economists, supermarkets and serious publications will prove that the Violet Beauregard Index is in fact bollocks, but it will hardly be mentioned by any of the mainstream media.

Then Jack will go back to relative obscurity...until the next time. But she will still be grifting off those stupid enough to contribute to her pocket money.

And so it goes on.
 
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MancBee said:
Anyhow, I am with those that think the Valerie Barlow Index will appear. But it will be the work of everyone else Jack has managed to rope in, and will be a load of old hyperbolic nonsense and easily disproved lies.

I expect all her loyal followers (Jackolites? Jackomites? Jack-ets?) will be lauding her and saying it is the best indicator of inflation EVER. It will appear in all the media, she will appear as a talking head on every TV channel (except Channel 4) and Jack will be the darling of the moment.

A few days later economists, supermarkets and serious publications will prove that the Violet Beauregard Index is in fact bollocks, but it will hardly be mentioned by any of the mainstream media.

Then Jack will go back to relative obscurity...until the next time But she will still be grifting off those stupid enough to contribute to her pocket money.
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Sad to say I‘m actually getting quite excited we are so close to deadline day for the Vagabond Babbling Idler being revealed. Can hardly wait to see what nonsense Jack comes out with, and her sycophants falling over themselves with the amount of praise they will sending her. Especially the Blue Ticks.

Going to be an awful lot of ‘Legend’, ‘Jack for PM/Chancellor/Next Queen’ stuff on the Twitter. Then later in the day an economist will say ’but’ and the whole thing collapses when looked at with the tiniest scrutiny.

Fun Friday in store 🤪😁
 
So through my university I have access to Box of Broadcasts, which is an huge archive of British TV and Radio. I thought I'd look up Jack and were a small handful of hits. I just listened and transcribed a Woman's Hour interview from 2013. I was hoping it would help with the poverty timeline, unfortunately it doesn't but there are a few small nuggets in there. I've put my transcription under a spoiler as it's quite long. If anyone is interested in me doing this for the other Jack hits from Box of Broadcasts I'm happy to do so in the future (and I didn't just do this because I'm procrastinating rather than work on an essay...honestly).

Woman's Hour 17th December 2013, the interviewer is Henrietta Harrison (HH), the interview takes place in Jack's kitchen, the timeline is the point where Jack has just broken through, book, Sainsbury's contract, Guardian column and so on.

The main presenter does a quick rundown of the poverty, unplugged fridge, no TV, £10 a week to live. Declares "...two years on things are very different" then hands over to HH.

HH describes the kitchen as very organised.

JM: "...everything is from basics and value range...I take simple ingredients and turn them into something much better. Lasagne sheets are just lasagne sheets, chopped tomatoes are just chopped tomatoes, its what you do with them that counts."

HH: (looking in the fridge) "You have to get on your knees to get into your fridge."

JM: "I'm quite a small person."

HH: "You have free range chicken in your fridge."

JM: "I use free range meat...I'd rather eat free range meat than eat lower welfare meat...there's no reason not to. If I can't afford to buy a chicken this week, but it's a good week (sic)."

HH lists vegetables in the fridge.

JM: "...I do get to crisis point every now and again and I think I've some rather sad looking leeks in there and think, right, it's going to be leeks all week."

HH and JM discuss the small size of the kitchen, it is established the dwelling they are in is a flat. Some discussing about if Jack would like a bigger kitchen, Jack says "one day".

A short section with JM and her son (SB) making biscuits. SB calls Jack "mummy".

JM: "...I left my job about two years ago, I was working for the fire service and I found it quite hard to find employment around my childcare hours after that...I was living on a budget of about £10 a week."

HH askes about Jack's most popular recipes.

JM: "...the most popular is carrot, cumin and kidney bean burgers...about 9p per burger."

HH talks about Richard Littlejohn (RJ) calling Jack the poverty princess and how RJ mocked Jack's kale pesto recipe saying poor people would not know what it was.

JM: "...kale is just cabbage...what Richard Littlejohn was saying is poor people don't eat cabbage. I beg to differ because it is one of the things I eat quite a lot of. His article stated that poor people only eat spaghetti out of tins and they don't eat pasta, spaghetti is pasta... I find generalisations of the poor quite tiring (goes on at some length to elaborate on this)."

HH asks about as Jack becomes more successful and inevitably earns more money if she will struggle to still connect with her readers.

JM: "Yes and no...I don't know how long this will all last...cooking on a low budget isn't an absolute necessity for me anymore, I'm doing it for my readers."

A short section of music plays.

JM: "I haven't had a Christmas dinner (corrects herself) I haven't cooked a Christmas dinner for myself for about three years...because of financial constraints and not having the motivation to. …I feel because of this I can make my own traditions...I've found a nice Finnish dish of liver and sultanas, it's a casserole, because of this it's quite communal so I'll invite round I'm looking forward to surprising them."

The interview ends there. I assume Jack's guests were thoroughly surprised by liver and sultana casserole.
 
Rat said:
Not to mention the entire point of her getting another tattoo was to annoy someone who finds then distasteful - an opinion which when held publicly is most likely based on an association between tattoos and the working class!
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But isn't that what she is an annoying little brat that if she was in school the teachers would hastily put to the front of the line and back into the arms of their parents.

She's annoying( she perceives it as quirky) she's a mouth piece especially about things of which she has little knowledge off. ( Exhibit A,being rightly corrected by that bloke of the telly). She want to be interestig but fails, because her true boring self always shows through.

I don't know why she doesn't just be content with what she's got. A nice house, a nice kid, nice ( to her) things.
 
Five hundred dogs said:
So through my university I have access to Box of Broadcasts, which is an huge archive of British TV and Radio. I thought I'd look up Jack and were a small handful of hits. I just listened and transcribed a Woman's Hour interview from 2013. I was hoping it would help with the poverty timeline, unfortunately it doesn't but there are a few small nuggets in there. I've put my transcription under a spoiler as it's quite long. If anyone is interested in me doing this for the other Jack hits from Box of Broadcasts I'm happy to do so in the future (and I didn't just do this because I'm procrastinating rather than work on an essay...honestly).

Woman's Hour 17th December 2013, the interviewer is Henrietta Harrison (HH), the interview takes place in Jack's kitchen, the timeline is the point where Jack has just broken through, book, Sainsbury's contract, Guardian column and so on.

The main presenter does a quick rundown of the poverty, unplugged fridge, no TV, £10 a week to live. Declares "...two years on things are very different" then hands over to HH.

HH describes the kitchen as very organised.

JM: "...everything is from basics and value range...I take simple ingredients and turn them into something much better. Lasagne sheets are just lasagne sheets, chopped tomatoes are just chopped tomatoes, its what you do with them that counts."

HH: (looking in the fridge) "You have to get on your knees to get into your fridge."

JM: "I'm quite a small person."

HH: "You have free range chicken in your fridge."

JM: "I use free range meat...I'd rather eat free range meat than eat lower welfare meat...there's no reason not to. If I can't afford to buy a chicken this week, but it's a good week (sic)."

HH lists vegetables in the fridge.

JM: "...I do get to crisis point every now and again and I think I've some rather sad looking leeks in there and think, right, it's going to be leeks all week."

HH and JM discuss the small size of the kitchen, it is established the dwelling they are in is a flat. Some discussing about if Jack would like a bigger kitchen, Jack says "one day".

A short section with JM and her son (SB) making biscuits. SB calls Jack "mummy".

JM: "...I left my job about two years ago, I was working for the fire service and I found it quite hard to find employment around my childcare hours after that...I was living on a budget of about £10 a week."

HH askes about Jack's most popular recipes.

JM: "...the most popular is carrot, cumin and kidney bean burgers...about 9p per burger."

HH talks about Richard Littlejohn (RJ) calling Jack the poverty princess and how RJ mocked Jack's kale pesto recipe saying poor people would not know what it was.

JM: "...kale is just cabbage...what Richard Littlejohn was saying is poor people don't eat cabbage. I beg to differ because it is one of the things I eat quite a lot of. His article stated that poor people only eat spaghetti out of tins and they don't eat pasta, spaghetti is pasta... I find generalisations of the poor quite tiring (goes on at some length to elaborate on this)."

HH asks about as Jack becomes more successful and inevitably earns more money if she will struggle to still connect with her readers.

JM: "Yes and no...I don't know how long this will all last...cooking on a low budget isn't an absolute necessity for me anymore, I'm doing it for my readers."

A short section of music plays.

JM: "I haven't had a Christmas dinner (corrects herself) I haven't cooked a Christmas dinner for myself for about three years...because of financial constraints and not having the motivation to. …I feel because of this I can make my own traditions...I've found a nice Finnish dish of liver and sultanas, it's a casserole, because of this it's quite communal so I'll invite round I'm looking forward to surprising them."

The interview ends there. I assume Jack's guests were thoroughly surprised by liver and sultana casserole.
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She's so mental about that liver sultana bonanza.
 
I am resting up after my fourth vaccine, because I have properly diagnosed medical issues. I wonder if Jack has had her second jab yet? All her (supposed) ailments, yet she thinks it is OK to go gallivanting hither and thither after only one vaccine (because of "reasons")

Did we ever find out what the emergency was that foreshortened her Edinburgh trip? No thought not.
 
Oohthedrama said:
I don’t follow her or interact with anyone who follows her,
But in the last week social media are desperate for that to change 😐
Twitter, Instagram, YouTube suggestions, I’m being bombarded with information about her book, I’m seeing tweets from people I don’t follow praising her, she’s in my suggested follows on Instagram and Twitter despite hitting not interested.

has she got new management or has she changed team and she’s now shagging the little Facebook dude, zucchini-berg?

it’s like what happened with Philip Scofield when ITV tried to make people think they like him..

Well with tinned goods, extortionately priced pasta and more heartburn. 😕
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Isn't it just likely to be algorithms related to Tattle use on your device?
 
HotesTilaire said:
I’d recap but I can’t remember much. Every day is the same now.
Jack continues to be lauded as the saver of Smart Price Rice which was available in store, but not on l8ne
Allegedly Sainsbury’s are thinking of taking her back
LJC isn’t. Still no C4 news coverage of the cheap food hyperinflation (that didn’t happen. I’m 344% sure)
The riot t-shirts have started arriving, hope the wonderful desperate people appreciate them.
@colouredlines continues to demonstrate why nobody has ever bothered to check The Poverty timeline.
Jack callled Martin Lewis a friend but he “we have mutual respect”-zoned her.
She’s threatening to spend all that free money she got on another bloody tattoo, some utter whelksplat suggested Vimes’s Boots.
She reckons she’s been working on the Index all week, whilst listening to songs from a 9/11 musical. Neither of those things are good.
The canal continue to write increasingly hilarious names for the Vimes Boots Index...you should all have a prize. An apostrophe badge for each and every one of you! I’m sure Jack hasn’t forgotten about the pin badges and phone cases.
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@HotesTilaire I LOVE your recaps! Always spot on and hilarious! 😂
 
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