Jack Monroe #193 Mama, pass the UNICEF statistics and the Hansards!

[BananaSmith]

In your hand, there's a saw,
And at Rishi you bawl,
That's a molè

(Artistic licence with the rhyming)

 

[EddieBeds]

These are AMAZING! Please don’t stop.

Desperately trying and failing to rhyme ‘trazzers on a bird’ in my head!

ETA:
No trazzers on a bird!
It’s the funniest lie we’ve heard
That’s a mole

PS: It’s tit I know - I’ll go do a Rishi tribute photo as punishment!

 

[indigomoon]

When you schmooze Ian Rankin
But your food’s pure gankin
That’s amolllleeeeee

These are AMAZING! Please don’t stop.

Desperately trying and failing to rhyme ‘trazzers on a bird’ in my head!

There’s trazzers on a bird
Making slop just like turd
That’s amooollleeeeeee!

 

[BananaSmith]

Tills will ring, ding-a-ling-ling

 

[GreyBudgie]

When traaaazers are matched,
With blouse embroidery patched
That’s a mole

 

[PortiaControl]

When you're having a grunk
Snaffling pineapple chunks
That's a molé

 

[BananaSmith]

When you reply with a SHAN'T,
You're just really a CANT,
That's a molè

(More artistic licence)

 

[MaineCoonMama]

Is anyone else reading other thread titles to the tune of That’s Amore?

 

[Hollaaa]

When you hire your street skips
And make eggy fish dips
That's a molé

When you really hate THAT MAN
And are 90% vegan
That's a molé

When you keep getting tax wrong
And you really hate this song
That's a moléeee

*apols if I am reappropriating other fraus' creative work at this stage in proceedings, I am very much inspired by our smol pixie.

 

[KingBabar]

Yet another sideboard
For the stuff that you hoard
That's amoleeee

 

[Sideboard Bob]

I feel like a DJ interrupting a disco mid-song to talk about a car park situation, but...

That award thing Jack’s been nominated for, it’s in association with ITV News. Are they the one (main) channel left that’s she’s not pissed off?

BBC - goes without saying *cough DKL cough*.
Channel 4 - That Man, and the association with LJC makes it a bit gauche for them to be seen working with her.

Has Eamonn or or his cousin put in a good word for her? Either way, I genuinely don’t understand how this has happened.
Also, I‘d never heard the word “gauche“ out loud until Allegra said it.

 

[PortiaControl]

When you sing really bad
With your "mate" Billy Bragg
That's a molé

Taking snaps with your tongue
Whilst we're hooting up lungs
That's a molé

 

[BananaSmith]

With the sideboards you love,
You mistake a bird for a glove,
That's a molè

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

Beloved Cabal I’ve hooted up a lung at you all you are all *chefs kiss* I think I may of cracked a rib laughing I’m off to hunt my Becca highlighter out before going to A&E and demanding a CT scan .

 

[schmetterling]

When you show the five star your cans
And in awe they raise their hands
That's a molé!

 

[Lanie]

When you have thousands of phones and all you do is moan.
That's a mole.

 

[heretoreaditall2019]

When the crown take ur firm,
Louisa Compton of ch4 news will squirm,
That’s amoré

When ur scarf says LJC,
N you’ve got more slop for tea,
That’s amoré

 

[Lanie]

When your being only fans with brown slop in five pans that's a mole.

When your foods in the bin the cabal make a din that's a mole.

 

[Dogmuck]

When you’re in a fugue state
Wear Boy cap for a date
That’s a moleeee

A good friend’s lost her scarf
It’s your ex don’t be darft
That’s a moleee

When your granddad is dead
Cut your hair shave your head
That’s a moleeee

 

[Lanie]

When your dress up in "dead Viv" you look like a div

That's a mole