Jack Monroe #153 I blended my pears specially

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She also allegedly burnt the top of her scalp on pancake day and lost a patch of hair but managed to lol and get photos of it.
It’s like she has a reverse pain threshold.
colouredlines said:
My favourite bit of Jack nonsense may be this:

The most minor of minor ailments - rashes, ouchy mouths, splinters - lead to sleepness nights howling in agony, consuming the entire contents of her medicine cabinet, attempting herbal remedies, seeking medical attention, etc, etc.

And yet she was SILENT throughout her THIRTY-HOUR LABOUR, which culminated in her watching her own caesarian.

I am childfree and have never experienced the feeling of an entire human being angrily attempting to exit my body, but my friends who are mothers assure me that it is no walk in the park.
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Grizzlybear said:
A tech failure and a hurty face? You spoil us, dear heart!
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It does look sore, and is far more convincing that the black eye. I hope it isn't self inflicted to get out of the book deadline.

Jack, put on your big girl knickers (soz to those that hate that expresion) and tell your publisher you have fucked up. It is not Iike they haven't guessed already.
 
Saint_clemmie said:
Do we have a list of illness’s, injuries and dramatic events to coincide with every “literal” deadline or job she’s ever booked? mysterious cough, glass in foot, glittery black eye, ouchy mouth...It’s all a blur.
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Since tattle:

Screenshot_20210221-231219_Notes.jpg
 
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colouredlines said:
My favourite bit of Jack nonsense may be this:

The most minor of minor ailments - rashes, ouchy mouths, splinters - lead to sleepness nights howling in agony, consuming the entire contents of her medicine cabinet, attempting herbal recipes, seeking medical attention, etc, etc.

And yet she was SILENT throughout her THIRTY-HOUR LABOUR, which culminated in her watching her own caesarian.

I am childfree and have never experienced the feeling of an entire human being angrily attempting to exit my body, but my friends who are mothers assure me that it is no walk in the park.
Click to expand...
I have a v high pain threshold. You literally cannot stay silent during labour unless you’re drugged up to the eyeballs and don’t know what’s going on. I didn’t scream with any of mine, but did make plenty of noise. You have to breathe it out like a mooing cow, your entire body convulses with spasms that are physically pushing a (to use the Friends quote) pot roast out of your vagina. A c-section is equally as crappy if it’s an emergency, in fact is probably worse, because there have been complications that led up to it being necessary during the already painful active labour. No way that this head, who was bawling about a splinter, was silent. No way, no how.
 
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