Caroline Hirons #37 The Devil Wears Camo

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SqualorVictoria said:
And why is there a different special guest for each show? It just makes no sense to expect people to buy tickets without knowing who the guest is. All that says to me is “we don’t have any and are frantically trying to find some”
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Highly likely:
1. Ava
2. Greg
3. That bloke she did the Irish chemist visit with, if she's doing a show over there.
4. Denise Welch
5. Ruth (just don't mention the mansion)

Unlikely:
1. Trinny
2. Nadine Baggott, given the mid-range shade
3. Sali Hughes, given the cleanser launch sabotage effort
4. Any semi-sane influencers
 
bottlewrapper said:
Highly likely:
1. Ava
2. Greg
3. That bloke she did the Irish chemist visit with, if she's doing a show over there.
4. Denise Welch
5. Ruth (just don't mention the mansion)

Unlikely:
1. Trinny
2. Nadine Baggott, given the mid-range shade
3. Sali Hughes, given the cleanser launch sabotage effort
4. Any semi-sane influencers
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This is a good game, tbh! "Hot" son likely to make an appearance; woman she threw under the bus while trying to get one up on Trinny unlikely.
 
bottlewrapper said:
An 'exclusive on-stage skincare demo'?

I think we all know that will be Greg, walking on to Erasure, as Hirons jumps up and does her dancing, whilst the more feeble-minded in the audience laugh hilariously.

Then a volunteer will be selected, a selection of the entire range of SR products will be wheeled on, and Greg will rub his sausage fingers over the mug of the poor volunteer whilst Caroline narrates 'how to apply creams to the face' for those who need to be told this. Spoiler: you don't dip your face in the pot.
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As Caroline yells "YOU LOT ALL RUB IT INTO YOUR PALMS AND LOSE HALF OF IT, YOU STUPID witches. THERAPIST'S HANDS. THERAPIST'S HANDS" as she demonstrates how to slide hands away from each other in a move she has trademarked and got the lawyers to buy the domain name for. "It's all right. We're mates. You should hear what the freaks call me. They don't hold back. I said, you don't hold back do you?!" *smug gurning face*
 
bottlewrapper said:
An 'exclusive on-stage skincare demo'?

I think we all know that will be Greg, walking on to Erasure, as Hirons jumps up and does her dancing, whilst the more feeble-minded in the audience laugh hilariously.

Then a volunteer will be selected, a selection of the entire range of SR products will be wheeled on, and Greg will rub his sausage fingers over the mug of the poor volunteer whilst Caroline narrates 'how to apply creams to the face' for those who need to be told this. Spoiler: you don't dip your face in the pot.
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Do we think she’ll do an “Oprah” and every audience member will find a Skin Shocked-at-the price product under their seat? It could explain the over inflated ticket price!
 
50sGirl said:
Do we think she’ll do an “Oprah” and every audience member will find a Skin Shocked-at-the price product under their seat? It could explain the over inflated ticket price!
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Only if she's got a warehouse full of them all approaching expiry date. 😂
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I still chuckle at the memory of her post on the group saying that as a thank you she was allowing them to buy tit bags kit bags for £30 😂😂😂
 
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I think her business is struggling. She’s doing more of these influencer posts of outfit of the day, at this rate she’ll be posting more than Erica Davies. She looks shite in most of what she wears, despite mostly being good clothes. Somehow I can’t see Stella or Gucci dropping her press/influencer gifts any time soon.
and whoever crawled up her bum to say she’s looks fantastic needs to take the Vaseline off their glasses.
 

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bottlewrapper said:
It's like Smash Hits interviews circa 1991 where they always asked the same things: How did you meet (at job centre)? What's your favourite colour (always red or blue)? Which artist would you most like to do a duet with (always someone on the same label, male singers always had to choose a woman to prove they weren't gay, female singers always chose another woman so they didn't upset their boyfriend)? Where is your favourite place in the world (always New York if they were going to try and crack America, Tokyo if their main sales were in Japan, or their Mum's kitchen if they were out on tour)?
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I love a Smash Hits reference. 🙌🫠
 
Shelly333 said:
I think her business is struggling. She’s doing more of these influencer posts of outfit of the day, at this rate she’ll be posting more than Erica Davies. She looks shite in most of what she wears, despite mostly being good clothes. Somehow I can’t see Stella or Gucci dropping her press/influencer gifts any time soon.
and whoever crawled up her bum to say she’s looks fantastic needs to take the Vaseline off their glasses.
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Agree. The only aspirational thing about this outfit is her pitifully hopeful tagging of Liberty and MaxMara 🤣
 
SqualorVictoria said:
It needs to be thread title!
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No, there’s much better - I’d like to put forward one from the last thread that narrowly missed out to the brilliant Devil Wears Camo title.
Imho it would be a shame not to use it…

Thread title suggestion: (amalgamation from @pommynoir and @Traazers)

Caroline Hirons #38 She’s like Donald Trump with moisturiser - make skincare great again!
 
I have to catch up on this thread, I've just seen this on the Freaks page. It's ten years old but it proves she'd botched her 🦆ing face

She hasn't commented as of yet but I should imagine she'll come out with the " I was fat, not looking after myself and peri menopausal"

I'm not against people having surgery or tweakments but I don't see the point in lying.
 

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Interesting what there is on Companies House and similar sites, I wondered how they managed to buy a house in West London on a single salary, turns out they didn’t, it was a council house, and until at least July 2021, they were still living in it. It’s much easier to build an empire when you’re living in a council property that other families (who are much much more in need) could benefit from, isn’t it?
 
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