Wolfnsunflowers #5 The one woman drama triangle

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FlashBoof said:
Who would have thought Bex would have a dog that doesn’t enjoy walking in inclement weather. What an amazing coincidence.
Anyway - did we not evidence she employs a dog walking service during the “how dare they name my dog in a public space” meltdown?
How much does a daily dog walk service cost? Asking for a full time working tax payer with a dog and no walking service.
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I can answer this one 🤣 Mine is a tenner a day but she is (by her own admission) exceptionally good value as I've had her for 15 years and cost has only gone up twice or so. Crispydog enjoys his thrice weekly slow plod with his fellow old dogs, particularly as he has recently been demoted to the Saga bus as the young 'uns on the other bus got on his tits.

However, I first employed mine 5x a week as I worked FT out of the home until covid times (wfh). First employed when less skint, then rather than cancel went without when very skint as Crispydog having a nice time in the day when I was at work was more important than dildo dresses and I didn't have a wishlist or paypigs, for shame. I should have wrote a book.
 
sunflowernwolves said:
Life has no timeline unless, of course, you set your own timeline and promise to write a book by April 2022 in exchange for £6k of strangers' hard-earned cash...

BUT TRAUUUUUMMMMMMAAAAAAAA!

View attachment 2566389 q

(She's so desperate for a viral tweet again.)
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Ah, but, life is one thing however time waits for no man or woman, no matter how many canes their arses break.
 
markcorriganscrisps said:
I can answer this one 🤣 Mine is a tenner a day but she is (by her own admission) exceptionally good value as I've had her for 15 years and cost has only gone up twice or so. Crispydog enjoys his thrice weekly slow plod with his fellow old dogs, particularly as he has recently been demoted to the Saga bus as the young 'uns on the other bus got on his tits.

However, I first employed mine 5x a week as I worked FT out of the home until covid times (wfh). First employed when less skint, then rather than cancel went without when very skint as Crispydog having a nice time in the day when I was at work was more important than dildo dresses and I didn't have a wishlist or paypigs, for shame. I should have wrote a book.
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This is a beautiful poem, actually.

Rather than write a book all on your own (which might be a lot of work), have you considered asking for submissions from like-minded people, which you'd edit to form a meaningful anthology? I think it could really take off.

Obviously, though, your post is not just a poem but evidence of you being a sexy super mama who does everything so beautifully and with your whole heart.

ETA

he has recently been demoted to the Saga bus as the young 'uns on the other bus got on his tits
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We could haiku the tit out of this. Good home ed opportunity, too.
 
Wooh said:
This is a beautiful poem, actually.

Rather than write a book all on your own (which might be a lot of work), have you considered asking for submissions from like-minded people, which you'd edit to form a meaningful anthology? I think it could really take off.
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Excellent idea, I shall ask the dog lady to put word out amongst other dog people. Some of the dogs may care to write their own erotic fiction also.

ETA THIS IS NOT ME CALLING YOU A DOG BEX, DOGS HAVE THEIR OWN AGENCY TOO
 
FlashBoof said:
Bless you @markcorriganscrisps …my old hound could bankrupt me before I cut off his expenses…but then I am not begging online for a living.
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Well, I have ponies so can contribute to any anthology with a theme of "my animals took all my money and time; I am sunburned and dirty, and I don't even mind."
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People-huv-tae-know said:
Ah, but, life is one thing however time waits for no man or woman, no matter how many canes their arses break.
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I think this thread has just gone full haiku. Please accept my humbly submitted poor and simple attempt:

Ah, life is long time
But time is a cane that breaks
On asses and goals
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markcorriganscrisps said:
Excellent idea, I shall ask the dog lady to put word out amongst other dog people. Some of the dogs may care to write their own erotic fiction also.

ETA THIS IS NOT ME CALLING YOU A DOG BEX, DOGS HAVE THEIR OWN AGENCY TOO
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I am snorting with
Laughter that Bex does nowt; dogs
have more agency
 
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sunflowernwolves said:
Call me radical, but I don't have a dog* because...

Wait for it...

I can't afford one, and it wouldn't be fair because I don't like walking, or the cold, and I used to be out all day, and I also can't afford a dog walking service.

*(I have cats because they like to lie down and be warm, which fits my lifestyle perfectly.)
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Haiku1:
I applaud your choice
Your self acuity: like
A cat, is self care

Haiku2:
Bex haikus, like fruit
low hanging are fun but, like
fun, their time is done
 
(I have a dog. Luckily he is the laziest article known to man (including Bex and SarahJJ).
Practically need a crowbar to get him out of his bed while he clings on growling 😂
But he is old now and likes his comforts).

My touching limerick.
Ahem.

There was a young woman called Bexxy
Who liked to tweet about things sexy
She's writing a book
With that money she took
But so far two years later has produced duck all.

I feel that last line needs work :unsure:
 
sunflowernwolves said:
Call me radical, but I don't have a dog* because...

Wait for it...

I can't afford one, and it wouldn't be fair because I don't like walking, or the cold, and I used to be out all day, and I also can't afford a dog walking service.

*(I have cats because they like to lie down and be warm, which fits my lifestyle perfectly.)
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Just coming back to this to say, @sunflowernwolves : hooray you. Yay us. No
markcorriganscrisps said:
Now why would one not ring, I dunno, just an idea, somewhere like Stepchange rather than asking twitter randos? 🤔
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Ah, it's a question, to be sure 😁
 
On one hand I'd be mortified to not only share this, but to do that BEFORE giving my head a wobble, lining up my ducks, puling up my big girls pants (sorry, been on the Mumsnet thread too long) and calling a professional... but I can see why the first instinct for perma-online bores is BRAINFART ON TWITTER.

And on the other hand, well... fair fucks to her really if it works. If someone wants to be a generous mug, it's their money not mine (a Bex mantra).

WRITE THIS bleeping BOOK THOUGH YOU bleeping THIEF
 
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