Thenursemum

[AreYouJoking?]

In august after his hospital stay where he THRIVED and started to look like a real boy not a skeleton she was sent home with a feed plan. Every 3 hours. 8 feeds in 24 hrs. She screwed with it the minute she got him home.
Now after another hospital ‘observation’ (because they will see she doesn’t do what she’s supposed to) she’s decided to reduce that to 3 feeds!!! Wtf that’s less than half. So more than double volume in each feed.
This is not good parenting. This is not her being a great mum. It’s abuse.
Why does she think she’s the only medical professional allowed to create his plan? As mentioned she isn’t even a paediatric nurse. And she has a conflict of interest.

 

[Rosalind96]

I can't believe what I'm reading on Kaytees stories this morning. Cut his feeds to 3? My tubie is a teenager and we still do many feeds a day, she's often fed 24/7 when struggling like a lot of tubies. Feeds doesn't work the same as meals AS SHE DEFINITELY KNOWS. Not that a regular toddler would only eat 3 times a day anyway, what about snacks and drinks. She knows it will make him sick, I suspect she's trying to make him seem poorly enough to qualify for continuing care again. He has a slow digestive system so she shoves as much feed as she can in at a time? Hmm great idea for a child with electrolyte issues and a heart condition
She just can't be arsed to feed him more than 3 times in a day or give him his prescribed meds. Lazy cow.

I so desperately wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt but I can’t see anything in that story but selfishness. Don’t understand how she can cut any meds. I’m sure they aren’t all “essential” as in he’ll die without them but surely they all prevent discomfort/help him in some way? Also, I’m confused as to why his doctors seem ok with him vomiting almost constantly and don’t seem to be investigating the cause. She’s mentioned this once before but then never again.

 

[YomAsal]

It takes a few days for a general anaesthetic to leave your system anyway, so its exceptionally poor timing to see if overfeeding him makes him sick (oh surprise, it does). 3 hourly feeds is quite common for a tube fed child, wonder how Kaytee thinks the rest of us manage? Many of us are single parents, with multiple children and jobs. We don't expect someone to pay for childcare so we can go to expensive hotels or piss about on instagram though.

 

[Spyglass]

Really Dont understand how she cannot manage 3 hourly feeds. I know my son is on 3 hourly over an hour. Medications 4 times daily. So are many other complex children. No one else seems to moan or say its unachievable. It's feeding your child. To keep then healthy and happy. Why is she constantly trying to make that little boy poorly.
When he was in hospital the last time, he was thriving. He put on weight. He was doing fantastic. Looked so so healthy. Ironically.... She wasn't with him. His dad was in hospital whilst she pranced around getting drunk with a man on a golf course, opening her beloved packages and waffling on in Js hottub that she supposedly cannot go in because she gets an allergic reaction.
Funny that the time her son is at his best... Is not in her care.

I personally think the professionals are definitely keeping tabs. The evidence is there in black and white that when left to her own devices, her son declines. We won't know the half of what's going on. He wasn't vomiting in hospital. He wasn't missing his vital medications there. He wasn't not getting fed there... Goes home and goes down hill.

Something is brewing. This is what she does when something big is coming up. Her son declines and then she uses that to her advantage. I fear for that little boy. Again, it's a case of he doesn't fit with her lifestyle. Selfish and lazy.

 

[AreYouJoking?]

This was an interesting stories.
Her shifts. She forgets his feed and meds. I mean shifts? We all know she calls him ‘The Child’ too. Without carers SHE won’t get to do the enjoyable things. Because it’s all about her.
6am-1am is pretty much the norm for most of us, I’d even go so far as to say that would be something to look forward to for many SEN or even non SEN parents.
But we don’t all post to SM for sympathy and we certainly don’t do it for financial gain.

 

[OutrageouslyScarlet]

This was an interesting stories.
Her shifts. She forgets his feed and meds. I mean shifts? We all know she calls him ‘The Child’ too. Without carers SHE won’t get to do the enjoyable things. Because it’s all about her.
6am-1am is pretty much the norm for most of us, I’d even go so far as to say that would be something to look forward to for many SEN or even non SEN parents.
But we don’t all post to SM for sympathy and we certainly don’t do it for financial gain.

She’s so entitled, I don’t have children but I know If I did you just have to get on with it. Mothers I know with healthy 3 year old children, rarely get to socialise etc children are time consuming. I cannot understand how she can openly say she’s missing meds and feeds and think that’s ok and we should all feel sorry for her. Then despite the apparent absolute exhaustion she goes back to nursing and gets kittens. What is wrong with you!

 

[Tomtom2020]

This was an interesting stories.
Her shifts. She forgets his feed and meds. I mean shifts? We all know she calls him ‘The Child’ too. Without carers SHE won’t get to do the enjoyable things. Because it’s all about her.
6am-1am is pretty much the norm for most of us, I’d even go so far as to say that would be something to look forward to for many SEN or even non SEN parents.
But we don’t all post to SM for sympathy and we certainly don’t do it for financial gain.

I first started following her with the carers kick off, around the time most of her followers arrived.

I didnt pay her much attention really, so didn’t see the full extent of her questionable behaviour.

but it was the fact she called it “the night shift” looking after HER OWN SON, popping his medications on a boomerang every single night.

was around this time I made the decision she’s a bit of a c***

 

[Basicbasic]

Cats playing with what looks like a hanging tube is giving me anxiety!

Re the 'night shift' if he's at school during the day and she's not working then perhaps she can rest during the day. Always more than enough time to film ads and polls.

 

[Blockedbyadmin]

In august after his hospital stay where he THRIVED and started to look like a real boy not a skeleton she was sent home with a feed plan. Every 3 hours. 8 feeds in 24 hrs. She screwed with it the minute she got him home.
Now after another hospital ‘observation’ (because they will see she doesn’t do what she’s supposed to) she’s decided to reduce that to 3 feeds!!! Wtf that’s less than half. So more than double volume in each feed.
This is not good parenting. This is not her being a great mum. It’s abuse.
Why does she think she’s the only medical professional allowed to create his plan? As mentioned she isn’t even a paediatric nurse. And she has a conflict of interest.

See now I’ve seen the light with her I read her story and thought oh my goodness. Of course he’s going to lose weight and vomit. I recon if he was in hospital for a few weeks he wouldnt have random vomits etc. I’m seeing more and more now that she wishes he would confirm more to what ‘normal kids’ and I’m trying hard to say the right thing, so her life is easier and not as it is if he was feeding all day long. If I was a carer for her id find it extremely difficult to do as she tells me knowing it will cause him issues. And I’m a qualified nurse of 12 years.

 

[YomAsal]

See now I’ve seen the light with her I read her story and thought oh my goodness. Of course he’s going to lose weight and vomit. I recon if he was in hospital for a few weeks he wouldnt have random vomits etc. I’m seeing more and more now that she wishes he would confirm more to what ‘normal kids’ and I’m trying hard to say the right thing, so her life is easier and not as it is if he was feeding all day long. If I was a carer for her id find it extremely difficult to do as she tells me knowing it will cause him issues. And I’m a qualified nurse of 12 years.

This must cause issues with the carers. In the few hours of hospice care I have the carers have to follow the prescribed meds and feeds regimes unless there is good reason, eg stomach bug. I wouldn't be allowed to say "oh skip that med I'm sure its not necessary" or "give her two feeds in one go to make it easier".
Something about that post just doesn't add up. "the first few days we had no vomits" - really? when was that then, as he would have been starved for the general anaesthetic so it can't have been that recent. And she didn't mention it at the time which would be unlike her. The meds take a few days to wear off too so that is probably why it didn't seem to make a difference at first. She's a nurse so she knows that.
The cats playing around the tube is really stressing me out. Theres no need for it to be dangling down like that, no wonder his site is sore. As an aside, a problematic stoma gives you points towards your continuing care score so she does have something to gain from it being not well looked after.

 

[Blockedbyadmin]

This must cause issues with the carers. In the few hours of hospice care I have the carers have to follow the prescribed meds and feeds regimes unless there is good reason, eg stomach bug. I wouldn't be allowed to say "oh skip that med I'm sure its not necessary" or "give her two feeds in one go to make it easier".
Something about that post just doesn't add up. "the first few days we had no vomits" - really? when was that then, as he would have been starved for the general anaesthetic so it can't have been that recent. And she didn't mention it at the time which would be unlike her. The meds take a few days to wear off too so that is probably why it didn't seem to make a difference at first. She's a nurse so she knows that.
The cats playing around the tube is really stressing me out. Theres no need for it to be dangling down like that, no wonder his site is sore. As an aside, a problematic stoma gives you points towards your continuing care score so she does have something to gain from it being not well looked after.

I just cannot as a mother understand why she would allow something to cause him pain or upset. If his site is red and angry looking obvs it’s going to cause him pain. It will sting and cause him
Itching and discomfort eventually leading to a fever if it gets infected.

I cannot understand her thought process which makes me
Continue to believe she wants him unwell to bring her attention. She wants him to need more attention and medical
Care and reading the posts from others and Sen mums it makes sense as she never ever praises his progress.

I feel a dick for not noticing it all before and now I can’t I see it

 

[Tomtom2020]

It’s the consistent sharing of unnecessary details. He was ‘begging, screaming, vomiting, sweating’ whilst in hospital.

don’t get me wrong I will share the lows alongside the highs when I chat about my child to others,
It’s part of the ‘journey’ hate that phrase (please note this is on a private account which I use to connect with other parents going through similar) NOT to 60k

But she goes out of her way to describe such details for the shock value.......

Dahlin’ why not say it wasn’t as smooth as you hoped, or that it was a lil tricky.

We know you’re reading here, so let’s just say it again. STOP using your sons additional needs as a bleeping hook to grow your audience to get some free fanny pads.

Also, stop filming your PT sessions and take your son to the park instead

 

[Jumpindesia]

Omg that FII NHS page is scary....
I remember i did safeguarding children awareness at work last year and they touched on it and said it is rare but a higher proportion of parents who do it are nurses!

I am starting to think she has something like this
- she loves the attention (and money) exploiting her little boy brings
-she has put on her stories that she has argued with staff in A&E
-she seems to use his dad when it suits her
- witholds his meds and foods
- exaggerates his conditions

I can just imagine what type of nurse she is as well...


Her self entitilement is disgusting...most parents have to look after their children 24/7 and work. SEN or not it is part of being a parent! Single parents and non single parents! She makes me sick....

 

[AreYouJoking?]

It’s the consistent sharing of unnecessary details. He was ‘begging, screaming, vomiting, sweating’ whilst in hospital.

don’t get me wrong I will share the lows alongside the highs when I chat about my child to others,
It’s part of the ‘journey’ hate that phrase (please note this is on a private account which I use to connect with other parents going through similar) NOT to 60k

But she goes out of her way to describe such details for the shock value.......

Dahlin’ why not say it wasn’t as smooth as you hoped, or that it was a lil tricky.

We know you’re reading here, so let’s just say it again. STOP using your sons additional needs as a bleeping hook to grow your audience to get some free fanny pads.

Also, stop filming your PT sessions and take your son to the park instead

I’ve said many times that if your a parent of a disabled/medically complex child and I see your profile or even if I see you in the street I know your troubles. I know your day to day and the highs and lows. The fears. The guilt.
The worry of a hospital admission or seeing your child put to sleep. The intimate details of a day in your life no I may not have personal experience of but I can imagine. And it’s likely I will imagine it worst than it is never better.
The narrative she adds to every single medical procedure he has is for her followers benefit. To play the sympathy card and to reinforce the trauma she experiences, for anyone who is naive enough to take it as verbatim.
Like so many of us have said we only ever down play because it makes us feel better or less upset and it avoids fake sympathy (have to say I’ve done this the whole 17 yrs I’ve been a parent and my older children do not have disabilities).
K actively encourages 60k people to react in the exact opposite fashion any of us honest and genuine parents do.
You are fake news K. Plain and simple.

 

[Oneofthesencommunity]

I think this is quite an optimistic view of professional vigilance to be honest. I know a child who we all believed was seriously disabled, it took until that child was a teenager for anyone to realise they were actually perfectly healthy but it was mum convincing everyone they needed lots of treatments and equipment.
I also know personally children who should clearly be on child protection plans for neglect and FII but SS leave them alone as they don't understand the complex needs of the child. Parents of physically disabled children are given a very light touch from SS here as intervention is so expensive. I had to pretty much beg social services to get involved when we were in a domestic abuse situation.
Many social worker will not be equipped or brave enough to argue with a "nurse" about their child's welfare.

Absolutely but without saying things that will make things obvious, some of us on here commenting know Kaytee outside of the instasphere and know what she has said herself about being questioned about things and that was before she became a influencer and had been in the media. Plus shes not your average sen parent, if SS were aware of her before she was in the media, now she has over 60k followers, they would be stupid to not act if there are concerns because if something happened they would have their heads on the block. Alot of parents who need their children safeguarding are secretive about it and dont post those things online, shes openly broadcasting multiple safeguarding concerns to tens of thousands.

 

[OutrageouslyScarlet]

It’s the consistent sharing of unnecessary details. He was ‘begging, screaming, vomiting, sweating’ whilst in hospital.

don’t get me wrong I will share the lows alongside the highs when I chat about my child to others,
It’s part of the ‘journey’ hate that phrase (please note this is on a private account which I use to connect with other parents going through similar) NOT to 60k

But she goes out of her way to describe such details for the shock value.......

Dahlin’ why not say it wasn’t as smooth as you hoped, or that it was a lil tricky.

We know you’re reading here, so let’s just say it again. STOP using your sons additional needs as a bleeping hook to grow your audience to get some free fanny pads.

Also, stop filming your PT sessions and take your son to the park instead

I’m sure you also find it amazing sharing the highs too. The little wins. S

 

[Tomtom2020]

I’m sure you also find it amazing sharing the highs too. The little wins. S

Exactly...... we don’t have milestones, we have inchstones, and every single one is amazing, we shout it from the rooftops. Every single achievement.

the lows are pretty low, but the highs will trump them all day long! Well, for myself and other *normal* loving parent that is!

 

[Pollyponsonby]

Omg that FII NHS page is scary....
I remember i did safeguarding children awareness at work last year and they touched on it and said it is rare but a higher proportion of parents who do it are nurses!

I am starting to think she has something like this
- she loves the attention (and money) exploiting her little boy brings
-she has put on her stories that she has argued with staff in A&E
-she seems to use his dad when it suits her
- witholds his meds and foods
- exaggerates his conditions

I can just imagine what type of nurse she is as well...


Her self entitilement is disgusting...most parents have to look after their children 24/7 and work. SEN or not it is part of being a parent! Single parents and non single parents! She makes me sick....

I have suspected this since I started following her 2 years ago.I don’t have the guts to write all of my dubious thoughts I have about her but as you say a high percentage of parents who have Munchausen by Proxy are health care professionals. Every single time she has backlash for a lavish spend ie holiday to Dubai or a break up, threat of loosing carers,basically anything in life that is not easy for Kaytee’s busy influencer life her son is admitted with a potassium imbalance.She is highly narcissistic,she needs and craves attention,adoration and sympathy,and a child’s hospital bed is a prime location for feeding her insecurities.

 

[Chipstiz]

So interesting to read all of your perspectives! I think she relies a lot on the fact that the majority of her followers have no SEN or nurse experience. I don't have any experience with that type of thing and if I saw the changing to 3 feeds a day post I wouldn't even think to question it. It also never occurred to me about the feeding tube being out until I read posts here, it seems really obvious now but because I had no experience with it I just took it at face value. It could be the same for a lot of others. X

 

[Life88]

Gosh this is all really sad. I don't have Instagram any more but it always made me uncomfortable how much she shared of J.