The advice thread for random problems #6

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Aliali23 said:
Saturday night I'd had a few wines and when I woke on Sunday I saw I'd accidentally followed one of the dads from my kids school 😫😫😬😬🙈 I swiftly unfollowed but they'd seen it, accepted it and requested to follow me. I left it but today accepted. I can't stop cringing the. I've never even spoken ti them!! How am I supposed to face the school gates. Should I have messaged saying it was an accident!!!
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Could you save it by saying you were looking for playdates for your kid lol an added a few parents?
 
Has anyone else had cold feet selling their property and if so, how do you know if it's just cold feet or something you should legitimately listen to? I'm sale agreed for the last few weeks and have been conflicted ever since we made the agreement - I put the place up for sale after a relationship breakdown, kind of a knee-jerk reaction using a sledgehammer to crack a nut. Financially I can afford to keep and stay here, I just panicked a bit I think and saw selling as a fresh start. Right now I don't have anywhere to go and the buyers are very keen to get things done and dusted quickly.

In some ways with a bit of money behind me the world would be my oyster but in other ways I'm not sure I have a fresh start in me! How do you make a decision when neither option is great or terrible :(
 
Does anyone know if you can do a bleach wash/bath on highlighted hair?
I’ve been having a root melt but went to another hairdresser & she screwed it up. I had T-section today (wanted to go lighter anyway) but as suspected (not down to the hairdresser) it’s taken in particular areas but not so well in others (where the root smudge was applied). Wondering if I might just be able to do it on some areas or if it will ruin the highlights? 😬
 
yogiessexdubs said:
Does anyone know if you can do a bleach wash/bath on highlighted hair?
I’ve been having a root melt but went to another hairdresser & she screwed it up. I had T-section today (wanted to go lighter anyway) but as suspected (not down to the hairdresser) it’s taken in particular areas but not so well in others (where the root smudge was applied). Wondering if I might just be able to do it on some areas or if it will ruin the highlights? 😬
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Don't attempt to do it at home, I had a nightmare once with over bleached highlights and ended up spending £150 having it corrected at another hairdresser. Took them nearly 5 hours too - it had to be treated, conditioned, treated, conditioned...... I was losing the will to live. Only good thing is that I've now stuck with them and never had a bad hair do since!
 
Need to get a new phone, who are you all with an what is their service like? Am currently EE an find that unless am on WiFi then the phones practically useless an I don't live rural where I'd expect crap service, even the city's am finding it's having problems with signal, is anyone else better? Or do I have to accept they are all tit now
 
Snippysnips said:
Need to get a new phone, who are you all with an what is their service like? Am currently EE an find that unless am on WiFi then the phones practically useless an I don't live rural where I'd expect crap service, even the city's am finding it's having problems with signal, is anyone else better? Or do I have to accept they are all tit now
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I’m finding that since they turned off 3G it’s been shite. I’m with Vodafone.
But if you wanted to try it as one of the big network options, Voxi is Vodafone and incredibly cheap relatively with no contract, it just rolls monthly unless you cancel.
You could activate a sim for a month and try it to see if it’s better than EE then do a phone package if it it without any risk.
(they should all be 14 days risk free but I don’t know if that actually works in practice when you get a new phone and contract)
 
littlepup said:
I’m finding that since they turned off 3G it’s been shite. I’m with Vodafone.
But if you wanted to try it as one of the big network options, Voxi is Vodafone and incredibly cheap relatively with no contract, it just rolls monthly unless you cancel.
You could activate a sim for a month and try it to see if it’s better than EE then do a phone package if it it without any risk.
(they should all be 14 days risk free but I don’t know if that actually works in practice when you get a new phone and contract)
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Thanks I'll maybe have a look into it, I've been on 4G an it's always been rocky but with the move to 5G now it's basically just straight up tit
 
If my profile views are turned off on TikTok, even if someone else has them turned on, can they see I’ve looked at their profile? 👀
 
I applied for a internal position at my work; different department to mine. Didn't even an interview. Spoke to my manager about it, and I was able to get an overview where they said they were very stict with the recuirment but if I enjoyed the overview, they would like to offer me an interview.

I've got my interview on Wendesday and when I got offered an interview, my anxiety has been through the roof. it's more money but it's shift patterns (which i knew before hand) and it's 12hr shifts i.e. 6am-6pm, 3 days off, 3 days on + standby.

I'm currently struggling being close to burnout in my current role which I think has spured me on to apply for this role. my friend (who is currently work with) was also going to apply so we started saying how great it would be if they took us both on.

But as I said earlier, my anixety has gone through the roof since i've been offerered an interview and I don't think I'm doing it for the right reasons? yes more money will be great and there's more room for development in the department that I'm going for the interview for.

But the shift pattern works put off (I currently work a Mon-Friday 9am-5pm basically) and I struggle when I've got a week off with and my friends are at work, so god forbid when I've got 3 days off and I've got nothing to do? plus one of the reaosns I'm close to being burnout is due to a team that I may/may not have to work with in this new position. PLus i worry that it'll impact my social life at weekends/evenings as that's when I do my hobbies or see friends etc. I had a part time job, alongside my current role previously and

SO I don't know what to do. Should I still go for the interview and pray that I don't get it? Or message them tomorrow and respectfully bow out now? i've been in currently role for 4 years so not sure if it's something new that's scarying me or if it's just my gut telling me somethings off?
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Bobbleowl90 said:
If my profile views are turned off on TikTok, even if someone else has them turned on, can they see I’ve looked at their profile? 👀
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Nah you're good!! :) I've got my turn off, but my friend has her turned on, so we did an experiment to see if she could see me stalking her page and she couldn't, so you're good to go ;)
 
It sounds like you're torn between the need for change, more money and concerns about what it might do to your work-life balance and well-being.

It’s only natural to feel anxious about making a big career decision, especially when it's motivated by push and pull factors such as burnout and higher pay.

Ask yourself what matters most right now, is it more money, work-life balance, or time for friends and hobbies?

If social time is most important to you, shift work may feel isolating. If better pay is your priority, the opportunities in this new position might outweigh some of the downsides.

If you’re still unsure, doing the interview could help give you a clearer picture. Think of it as a way to learn more before making a decision. It may help to think of this as a learning experience rather than an all-or-nothing decision. Go into the interview with an open mind, knowing that you’re still in control, and you can always decline the new position if doesn’t feel right. Good luck!
 
Rubberdungeon said:
It sounds like you're torn between the need for change, more money and concerns about what it might do to your work-life balance and well-being.

It’s only natural to feel anxious about making a big career decision, especially when it's motivated by push and pull factors such as burnout and higher pay.

Ask yourself what matters most right now, is it more money, work-life balance, or time for friends and hobbies?

If social time is most important to you, shift work may feel isolating. If better pay is your priority, the opportunities in this new position might outweigh some of the downsides.

If you’re still unsure, doing the interview could help give you a clearer picture. Think of it as a way to learn more before making a decision. It may help to think of this as a learning experience rather than an all-or-nothing decision. Go into the interview with an open mind, knowing that you’re still in control, and you can always decline the new position if doesn’t feel right. Good luck!
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Thank you!! This was so nicely put 👏 I definitely always want a healthy work life balance which I’ve got right now so I am worried it will upset that and I don’t think the more money will change that!
 
Is it normal to just not retain anything?? 🙈 we had a training at work this morning with a quiz after, I flicked through the slides and then answered the Q’s fine… but then everyone was chatting about it this afternoon and bringing up certain points, once I X’d out I completely forget everything and wouldn’t even be able to put a few sentences together about what the training entailed…

I will also watch the same things on TV or same films and even though I know I’ve seen it, I’ll have completely forgotten what the episodes are about or what happens! Same with books, I know I’ve read it but couldn’t give you two lines on the plot…

Is this normal?!!
 
gabbysolis said:
Is it normal to just not retain anything?? 🙈 we had a training at work this morning with a quiz after, I flicked through the slides and then answered the Q’s fine… but then everyone was chatting about it this afternoon and bringing up certain points, once I X’d out I completely forget everything and wouldn’t even be able to put a few sentences together about what the training entailed…

I will also watch the same things on TV or same films and even though I know I’ve seen it, I’ll have completely forgotten what the episodes are about or what happens! Same with books, I know I’ve read it but couldn’t give you two lines on the plot…

Is this normal?!!
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This is called something but I can’t remember what it’s called. But basically it’s like you’ve got a weak memory muscle- normally people who are ADHD/neurodivergent c
 
gabbysolis said:
Is it normal to just not retain anything?? 🙈 we had a training at work this morning with a quiz after, I flicked through the slides and then answered the Q’s fine… but then everyone was chatting about it this afternoon and bringing up certain points, once I X’d out I completely forget everything and wouldn’t even be able to put a few sentences together about what the training entailed…

I will also watch the same things on TV or same films and even though I know I’ve seen it, I’ll have completely forgotten what the episodes are about or what happens! Same with books, I know I’ve read it but couldn’t give you two lines on the plot…

Is this normal?!!
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Poor memory can be linked to a lot of things, have you been quite stressed lately? Or been having poor sleep?

I'd look up what can give poor memory an then go down the list, if everything seems fine then I'd look more into it, but could be other things going on that might be the cause of it
 
gabbysolis said:
Is it normal to just not retain anything?? 🙈 we had a training at work this morning with a quiz after, I flicked through the slides and then answered the Q’s fine… but then everyone was chatting about it this afternoon and bringing up certain points, once I X’d out I completely forget everything and wouldn’t even be able to put a few sentences together about what the training entailed…

I will also watch the same things on TV or same films and even though I know I’ve seen it, I’ll have completely forgotten what the episodes are about or what happens! Same with books, I know I’ve read it but couldn’t give you two lines on the plot…

Is this normal?!!
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I'm often similar especially watching the same stuff and not remembering books. I find it's because I don't think about it after it just disappears from my mind. If I try to consolidate the memories after then it becomes easier to remember. Like if I went on a course and then next day look through the notes then it would come back to me and would be more likely to remember it later. I mean it's not easy to remember things long term, it relies on short term memory until we actually absorb it into long term memory and that's done through repetition. Some people find it easier to hear things once and recall them but that's not me 😅
 
Does anyone use apps to help with screen time? Am not really looking to block things out completely, just want to keep track of how much time am using on certain apps to make me more aware to try to minimise my time, an perhaps a night mode where I can't be scrolling endlessly at night, I really know I shouldn't be but once am on those reels I find am just none stop scrolling 😖
 
Snippysnips said:
Does anyone use apps to help with screen time? Am not really looking to block things out completely, just want to keep track of how much time am using on certain apps to make me more aware to try to minimise my time, an perhaps a night mode where I can't be scrolling endlessly at night, I really know I shouldn't be but once am on those reels I find am just none stop scrolling 😖
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Not sure what phone you have but mine has digital wellbeing tools in settings already and that has time spent on apps and you can set limits. I've also used an app called block where you can set blocks to come on at certain time, for a certain time period, and specific apps. Might be worth doing though I know you said you don't want to block stuff, but it lets you unblock it, it's just a bit more effort, with some of the apps you need to restart your phone.

Instagram also has limits where it will give you a reminder when you pass it, though you can choose to ignore the limit for the day

I have to say the only thing that works for me though is leaving my phone out of reach, in another room or if I'm in bed somewhere where I need to get up to get it
 
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