Sober Curious tattlers support thread (Dry January and beyond!)

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I opened a bottle of wine on Thurs and had two spritzers a night on Thurs/Fri and now feel really tit. I have had an emotionally tough week and I don't think it helped!

It's my birthday on Tues so may have a lil glass of wine then, we'll see.
 
Hello!! Its great to find this thread, I have hardly drank since about August 2020 when I realised just how much I was drinking during lockdown and how awful I was feeling because of it!!

I'm wondering if anyone else deals with family and friends not taking you seriously when you turn down an alcoholic drink? Almost laughing it off and pressuring you to have one anyway? Ive had it happen quite a bit since i stopped drinking.

I'm going on a little break with my mum and family soon and she asked me what drink we will be bringing for the house we are staying in, I told her as I'm not drinking ill just be bringing the things I like to drink instead (coke zero, juice, shloer) and she replied saying "don't be stupid you're on holiday you HAVE to drink?". It annoys because actually I don't HAVE to drink, i don't HAVE to do anything if I don't want too. I suppose because I used to be such a big drinker in the past people just think that's who I am and ill allways go back to drinking at big occasions or holidays etc, it really gets my back up when I feel pressured like that. Maybe it'll take more time for people to accept it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Does anyone get what I mean?
 
Yes! I used to drink a lot, especially at a party or on holiday. My mum lives abroad and she kept mentioning drinking with me and I had to keep reminding her that I don’t really drink anymore and I’m also on 22 pills a day! She seems to be getting it now.

Although we still won’t be seeing each other for a while anyway as where they live isn’t on the green list and I haven’t had my vaccinations yet (a requirement for where they are).

I was going to the pub tonight but not now and I’m relieved. I said we would go later on in the month though as it will be my birthday.
 
I’ve never really liked the taste of alcohol, or the feeling it gives. I HATE how it makes me dizzy. My mum is an alcoholic and I wonder if that’s partly the reason I rarely drink 🤔 I probably drink a few times a year, my birthday, Christmas, partners birthday etc, and usually ill just drink cocktails. My family have given up asking if I want a drink now, they know i prefer a glass of water 😂😂
 
Littleelf said:
Hello!! Its great to find this thread, I have hardly drank since about August 2020 when I realised just how much I was drinking during lockdown and how awful I was feeling because of it!!

I'm wondering if anyone else deals with family and friends not taking you seriously when you turn down an alcoholic drink? Almost laughing it off and pressuring you to have one anyway? Ive had it happen quite a bit since i stopped drinking.

I'm going on a little break with my mum and family soon and she asked me what drink we will be bringing for the house we are staying in, I told her as I'm not drinking ill just be bringing the things I like to drink instead (coke zero, juice, shloer) and she replied saying "don't be stupid you're on holiday you HAVE to drink?". It annoys because actually I don't HAVE to drink, i don't HAVE to do anything if I don't want too. I suppose because I used to be such a big drinker in the past people just think that's who I am and ill allways go back to drinking at big occasions or holidays etc, it really gets my back up when I feel pressured like that. Maybe it'll take more time for people to accept it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Does anyone get what I mean?
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Maybe when you're there stick around for the social aspect of their drinking but if they're getting 'on it' make your excuses and go to your room or something else. If they pressure you when they're sober no doubt they'll be even worse after a few drinks, especially if you're all in a house together. Can't reason with people when they've been drinking, their brain just isn't working the same way.
 
Littleelf said:
Hello!! Its great to find this thread, I have hardly drank since about August 2020 when I realised just how much I was drinking during lockdown and how awful I was feeling because of it!!

I'm wondering if anyone else deals with family and friends not taking you seriously when you turn down an alcoholic drink? Almost laughing it off and pressuring you to have one anyway? Ive had it happen quite a bit since i stopped drinking.

I'm going on a little break with my mum and family soon and she asked me what drink we will be bringing for the house we are staying in, I told her as I'm not drinking ill just be bringing the things I like to drink instead (coke zero, juice, shloer) and she replied saying "don't be stupid you're on holiday you HAVE to drink?". It annoys because actually I don't HAVE to drink, i don't HAVE to do anything if I don't want too. I suppose because I used to be such a big drinker in the past people just think that's who I am and ill allways go back to drinking at big occasions or holidays etc, it really gets my back up when I feel pressured like that. Maybe it'll take more time for people to accept it 🤷🏼‍♀️

Does anyone get what I mean?
Click to expand...
Yes I get this with work colleagues a lot - to the point where I’ve asked for a Diet Coke and been bought a vodka Diet Coke. I just think it’s so rude, there could be any number of reasons I don’t want to drink, why is it someone else’s place to say I have to??

I find the best thing is not to rise to it, just quietly drink your juice and don’t mention it. Or tell your mum she can clean up your sick the next day if she really wants you to drink 🤣🤣
 
Begborrowsteal said:
At my worst, I was drinking 2-3 bottles of wine a night. Its now about 2-3 times a week but its still too much and I want to really cut down to just once a week. Its tough once you create that routine of it, and used as a destresser!
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I‘ve been drinking twice a week lately, I agree it’s too much. my aim is to cut it down to one (just Saturday). Gym classes are reopening and it’s very good incentive for me. I love that buzz during group HIIT or Grit sessions, it’s a no no if you drank the night before.
 
Sober now for 3 years. Was never an alcoholic but always a binge drinker when I did and combined with my mh issues got myself into some not-so-great situations.

I recommend finding something, anything, other than drugs lol to replace the drink with. Even try alcohol free drinks if you still want the same taste, I'll often have a mocktail whilst my friends are having cocktails.

I'm at the point now where I don't miss alcohol and never desire it. I'm not anti-alcohol by any means and still enjoy going out socialising and having maybe one or two glasses of wine or a cocktail if I feel like I won't get carried away. Sober life is fun, I really had to learn how to have fun without alcohol and it's nice to actually remember the fun I had and not wake up the next day feeling tit and worrying about what dumb things I did the night before.
 
bagafreebee said:
There are loads of sober accounts on IG I really like soberfishie ,soberdave and for younger people thissobergirl. They have done loads of lives on IGTV which I enjoy watching if you need a little nudge to keep going or tempation is calling . Any other good accounts?
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I like drunkmummysobermummy too. Particularly good for mums if that's anyone.

I've tried to give up a good few times over the last few years but I always kept going back. Unfortunately 'back' is a bottle of wine a night so just so bad for me. But this time seems to be different. I've not given up completely, had a drink last Friday evening, but the way it makes me feel now :$...the recovery has made it not worth the pleasure. I love drinking, the way it feels, love wine, but I just can't cope with it anymore. It actually feels amazing, I can sleep, I look younger, my skin looks fab and I'm productive in the morning!

I think I've decided that I'll have a pint in the pub if I go (which is almost never so not too big a deal and always for a short time really) but no wine and no drinking at home at all. I've always been amazed at people who can just have 1 or 2 drinks on a Friday, it's the full bottle, every night that is so damaging.
 
I did my first night out with friends sober last night! Had SUCH a good time, a nice restful sleep and woke up with no hangover.

Another girl in my group is also on a sober journey but rather than curious like me (i.e. I will probably drink once in a while), her circumstances leading up to going dry means she never ever wants to drink again. She text me today saying that it was so helpful having a sober buddie to support her last night so that makes me feel super.

Also, being sober meant I drove home instead of walking in the pouring rain!!
 
Prgirl_cesca said:
I did my first night out with friends sober last night! Had SUCH a good time, a nice restful sleep and woke up with no hangover.

Another girl in my group is also on a sober journey but rather than curious like me (i.e. I will probably drink once in a while), her circumstances leading up to going dry means she never ever wants to drink again. She text me today saying that it was so helpful having a sober buddie to support her last night so that makes me feel super.

Also, being sober meant I drove home instead of walking in the pouring rain!!
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That's fantastic!! You really can have just as much fun sober and actually remember it the next day with no dreadful hangover!
It's great you had a sober buddy, it really does make things way easier if you have someone else sober with you.

Well done!
 
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