Mumsnet #48 Cherchez la spunk splatter

[bread-pitt]

How does anyone just up and move? Having just been through the process of getting DC an F1 student visa which cost me at least £1k, plus all the paperwork, surely you can’t just “move to the US”?

I agree. We’ve visited a few times now and the prices of most things are pretty much the same $/£. So if the exchange rate is good you can benefit a bit- a pair of trainers will be £95 in the uk and $95 in the US, so it works out cheaper for us. Especially as often the tax is added on top in the US. Eating out and even stuff like Starbucks is very expensive.

Despite our reputation as a “nation of immigrants” the US is one of the most difficult places to move to unless you fit a very narrow set of criteria. One of my brothers met a girl online in another country and went through the process of bringing her here to marry her. It was a long, tedious process, as anything involving the government is. But basically unless you have immediate family here, are engaged to someone here, have millions to invest, have a confirmed place at a college, or have a high-demand skill, you’re going to struggle.
It’s not the 1800s any longer where you could just get on a boat and come here with a hope and a dream, as our ancestors did.

 

[Yel]

If they are moving here because of the cost of living in the UK, they are in for a shock. On my trips to the UK I have deduced that only three things are cheaper here than the UK: driving (gas, parking), hotels, and fast food. Everything else is more expensive here.

It's bizarre the number of people who have no clue the inflation issues are worldwide.

I haven't been to the UK since last year so don't know the current prices, but back then I did a Lidl shop to take some stuff back with me. 200g of cashews for £1.59 is a thing of dreams.

One of my boyfriends friends stayed with us for a week and faced an existential crisis that he couldn't blame brexit and Tories for everything. I'm not saying either are a good thing, but without both there wouldn't be much of a difference in food, energy, interest rates etc.

 

[Iamthebosun]

It's bizarre the number of people who have no clue the inflation issues are worldwide.

I haven't been to the UK since last year so don't know the current prices, but back then I did a Lidl shop to take some stuff back with me. 200g of cashews for £1.59 is a thing of dreams.

One of my boyfriends friends stayed with us for a week and faced an existential crisis that he couldn't blame brexit and Tories for everything. I'm not saying either are a good thing, but without both there wouldn't be much of a difference in food, energy, interest rates etc.

I bought cashew nuts earlier that were 99p a bag from Asda and that’s the normal price! I know there definitely have been price rises and a cost of living crisis etc but I can’t take Mumsnetters seriously when they’re complaining about the price of their food shopping and then list what they buy and it turns out their enormous handsome twin sons who are very sporty eat three legs of lamb, 18 punnets of berries and 4 loaves a bread a day ‘slathered’ in ‘good quality’ peanut butter as snacks.

 

[drunkwasps]

The master bedroom!

 

[cowtastrophe]

The master bedroom!

There used to be a troll who was called box room poster because all her threads were variations on her DP trying to force her kids to have the box room while his DC had the biggest room. That post smacks of that.

 

[BlairWaldorf86]

Oh wow I’d forgotten about her. One of the OG Mumsnet trolls, she was fondly referred to as “Boxy” by the regulars!

 

[cat_follower]

Some nice, completely sane advice for everyone x

 

[Florentine]

So, logically, I suppose it's best to kill the ex-wife if she's not conveniently dead already?
There's no ex-wife like an ex-ex-wife

 

[Iamthebosun]

Some nice, completely sane advice for everyone x
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Does she think only ex wives will have an opinion on a relationship? The kids will, his family will, his friends will, his neighbours, his acquaintances, his Facebook friends, his colleagues and all of yours as well! So basically stay single until you wake up and you and one other person are the only ones left alive and then you can get together

ETA - I know this is bad taste but I will also add a dead ex wife can be worse than an ex wife because with some people you will never live up to her. As a very famous (extreme) example princess diana and Camilla - people were doing videos about ‘what if Diana was alive and became the queen’ when queen died etc.

 

[Florentine]

Totally agree with that.

 

[ShopTilYouSlop]

There still exists a view that the only acceptable reason to be a single parent is if you were widowed.

 

[Florentine]

I didn't read the thread that preceeded the new one by marmamumma (something to do with her son getting engaged) but I can see why she had some flak.
My toes are already curling at "Caring sons are the best" and the posts about how she adores them (so unusual - mother loves children) and "My boys are all so sporty!".

 

[definitelynotvlad]

The master bedroom!

This thread is insane, the usual “my kids left home as soon as they could walk!” responses - yeah cos you sound horrible and they probably couldn’t wait to get away. Honestly I’d never have left home if I hadn’t decided to move to London in my early 20s. I’m nearly 40 now and after 16 years of independence am looking for a house to buy with my mum and dad but they’re in their 70s so it’s my turn to repay their kindness and make sure I’m nearby as they get older. Tres grateful to actually have a nice family, and realise I am lucky in that regard. Why do so many mumsnetters seem to resent their children / stepchildren / spouses / parents / neighbours / cleaners / shop assistants / basically any human they come into contact with?

 

[FeloniousMonk]

The master bedroom!

"He looked at me like I'd lost my mind"
I think that was probably him thinking "Oh tit I must have lost MY mind asking this grabby entitled witch to move in"

 

[HelenaHandbasket]

Some nice, completely sane advice for everyone x
View attachment 3241601 q

Does it apply the other way around too? Should men only date women whose ex is dead?

My partner's family weren't impressed when they found out we were dating and that I was still married to someone else and had three kids.
Thankfully they are nice people and chilled the duck out.

 

[Melian]

Ok you are all going to really hate me but I no longer buy xmas presents for my kids. To be fair they are 29, 27 and 22, but we talked about it together and decided as we all had too much tit anyway, we would only buy for my mum and for the grandkids. My mum was horrified because she loves buying tit for us like Dove/Lynx giftsets, clothes that don't fit, slippers that are never worn etc etc so we all still buy for her (this year we are getting her a robot lawnmower )

We still buy for birthdays (I usually give them cash) and if I see something I know they like or need throughout the year, I buy it for my kids then rather than gift at christmas.

I still decorate and host at christmas, but I just don't want to buy for the sake of it anymore.

If I could have things my way, this would happen. Would still have the turkey dinner on Christmas day. But wouldn't exchange presents - there's either nothing I want or it's too expensive.

 

[Zara zara]

The Messy Church thread is really pissing me off such snarky christophobic comments . They always come for Christians . When I was in a bad way with depression when my eldest children were toddlers it was attending a Messy Church that helped through a hard time and there were all different ethnicties and religions who attended. The local Christian Church showed nothing bit kindness to me

 

[Halister]

Seen this nonsense … I’m guessing the OP (pervert) wants some porn fantasies shared with them

 

[Shoreditcher]

Imagine telling your mates about your birthday present “oh my wife sat next to me while I had a wank”

 

[bread-pitt]

The master bedroom!

Is it common in the UK that bedroom doors have locks? I’ve lived in many homes here in the US during my 50 trips around the sun, but never lived in one with bedroom doors that have locks. I’d think that would conflict with fire codes?