Mumsnet #30 Six figure salary, never eats a calorie

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uberoblique said:
I dunno. I have an IVF baby but surrogacy and anonymous gamete/oocyte donation don’t sit well with me. I’m okay with known donors.

MN however froth at the mouth whenever the poor infertiles are brought up. Basically we should be willing to chat endlessly about their children, never be upset about our childlessness, and IVF is unnatural and will set your child up for a lifetime of “unknown” health problems. There’s a couple of posters who are absolute psychos about it, I think BlossomToes is one.
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Someone yesterday posted about having a miscarriage and her friend is pregnant and when she got home she had a little cry and she was advised not to ‘sour’ her friends pregnancy. By crying in private. After a miscarriage. She was also told ‘your friends baby is not your baby, you need to separate them’. They often leave me speechless. I’m childfree and there’s been threads on there about how childfree women don’t have empathy as you’re not maternal/nurturing/loving/empathetic until you’ve had children and I can’t believe they type that with a straight face after the way infertile women/women struggling with conceiving (and everyone else) get ripped into on there.
 
Some things that are "natural"...

Volcanic eruptions. Angry snakes. Avalanches. Beachy Head.
orangehead said:
Someone yesterday posted about having a miscarriage and her friend is pregnant and when she got home she had a little cry and she was advised not to ‘sour’ her friends pregnancy. By crying in private. After a miscarriage. She was also told ‘your friends baby is not your baby, you need to separate them’. They often leave me speechless. I’m childfree and there’s been threads on there about how childfree women don’t have empathy as you’re not maternal/nurturing/loving/empathetic until you’ve had children and I can’t believe they type that with a straight face after the way infertile women/women struggling with conceiving (and everyone else) get ripped into on there.
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That's so funny, I was very maternal, nurturing, loving and empathic once - didn't look too bad either. Then I had kids and now I've got Maleficent's personality in Waynetta Slob's body.

ETA: My point is, I am glad and grateful for my kids, but reproducing hasn't made me a morally better person.
 
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holasun said:
Is this like the soup down the jumper theory?

Poor/working class - cheap clothes
Nouveau rich - designer clothes
Actually wealthy - old clothes with soup all over them

Poor/working class - can't actually write
Nouveau rich - use technology
Actually wealthy - pen and paper (ideally a very old pen in the family for years, scrawled onto the back of a scrap of basildon bond you found lying around)
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I'm currently wearing a reasonably expensive (£35) jumper with KFC gravy on it, where do I fit into this hierarchy?
 
Just waiting for the deletion message on this one because surely nobody is actually thick enough to even consider this
 

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bottlewrapper said:
They probably also tell people in wheelchairs that they're soooo lucky they don't have to walk up stairs and tire their legs out...
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Probably would, people are surprisingly insensitive and thick when it comes to disabilities.
I am agoraphobic and have had so many ppl say to me "oooh i'd love to stay at home all the time, would be lovely, especially in the winter" Oh really Marjorie? Yeah it's bleeping marvellous not having a bleeping life, you stupid bleep!
 
FeloniousMonk said:
I'm currently wearing a reasonably expensive (£35) jumper with KFC gravy on it, where do I fit into this hierarchy?
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I think what matters is how one aquires the stained jumper? Is it new (then you're poor). Is it old and a family heirloom handed down from dear granny (then you're wealthy).
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Although if it's stripey, you're wealthy and french - the MN pinacle.
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Reading all the IVF discussion made me think about what things I do/have done that MN would villainize me for. I think I've got a good list but obviously the top one is the thing that made me think about this:
- had a TFMR (automatic ticket to hell probably)
- have multiple tattoos and piercings whilst holding down a full time professional job (I actually think this means I can't possibly exist according to MN)
- actually like my spouse
- actually like food
- don't own any stripey clothes, drink coffee or aspire to be french
 
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GalaxyGirl70 said:
I was always quite opinionated about IVF not being natural etc until my second baby was stillborn. Afterwards I felt this inexplicable urge to have another even though at that stage we didn't know if it would be possible to, and I would frankly have done anything to make that happen because until you've known utter desperation you can't say what you'd do. As for adoption, after seeing a family friend go through utter hell with two children she adopted that had been removed due to neglect and parental drug abuse, it would honestly be my worst nightmare. How dare people bandy it around as a cure all for infertility.
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I'm so sorry you went through this. It is heartbreaking.
 
orangehead said:
Someone yesterday posted about having a miscarriage and her friend is pregnant and when she got home she had a little cry and she was advised not to ‘sour’ her friends pregnancy. By crying in private. After a miscarriage. She was also told ‘your friends baby is not your baby, you need to separate them’. They often leave me speechless. I’m childfree and there’s been threads on there about how childfree women don’t have empathy as you’re not maternal/nurturing/loving/empathetic until you’ve had children and I can’t believe they type that with a straight face after the way infertile women/women struggling with conceiving (and everyone else) get ripped into on there.
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They really are a bunch of fecking arseholes
 
There’s a thread on there just now where someone has kicked off at their casual, long-distance, fairly new boyfriend because they had a dream that he’d slept with someone else: she confronted him with it, he was (understandably) unimpressed: “In my head, I was 100% certain he'd been with someone else. But he was like ???? And it jolted me into thinking, have I just made all that up in my head? Maybe because of the dream I had?”
He didn’t reply to her for a few hours, so she messaged him with ‘duck you, you’ve fucked this up’. So, clearly the OP is batshit enough without any encouragement, but even more insane is this little gem from another poster:

“Sometimes there is a thing of remote viewing ability, its possible that your dream was more than a dream.”

I swear, MN has introduced me to a whole sub-level of stupidity that I did not know existed. 🙄🙄🙄
 
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ButtonDownTheHutches said:
There’s a thread on there just now where someone has kicked off at their causal, long-distance, fairly new boyfriend because they had a dream that he’d slept with someone else: she confronted him with it, he was (understandably) unimpressed: “In my head, I was 100% certain he'd been with someone else. But he was like ???? And it jolted me into thinking, have I just made all that up in my head? Maybe because of the dream I had?”
He didn’t reply to her for a few hours, so she messaged him with ‘duck you, you’ve fucked this up’. So, clearly the OP is batshit enough without any encouragement, but even more insane is this little gem from another poster:

“Sometimes there is a thing of remote viewing ability, its possible that your dream was more than a dream.”

I swear, MN has introduced me to a whole sub-level of stupidity that I did not know existed. 🙄🙄🙄
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Is that the same thing as manifesting stuff by saying them it loud?

Here's another post from the same thread:
Very vivid dreams are important. It could be tuning into something that has happened (this actually happened to me several times) or is going to happen, or it could simply be you tuning into your intuition about who he is. Thank your dreams and move on and up!
 
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