Mumsnet #27 If you're only coming to goad, you're not getting our bleeping codes

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Lazarus said:
i'm recovering (not recovered yet) from an eating disorder. a large portion of food overwhelms me and gives me terrible anxiety. (i'm not a small woman; i'm size 16 and when i'm not in the throes of the ED, i really enjoy eating).
I'd rather have a small plate and go back for a bit more if my mind/body are able to. i assure you there's nothing performative about it.
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It wasn't me who said it was performative, it was the poster who quoted my post.
 
I’m have a little man follow me around with a replica of Stonehenge carved from Botswana diamonds. When I need to know the time I gesture him to provide. Time is for the little people.

Aaaah boarding school. Half the girls leave weighing little more than a fag packet - the heiffers amongst us hoovered up “supper” - one dish I remember was basically Frosties, mixed with honey and smothered in cream. I went up 3 dress sizes in a year. 😳
 
Also have an Apple Watch that does the same. Passive aggressively tells me when I’ve been sat down for too long as well😒
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‘To think it was inconsiderate at my gender reveal’ has gone exactly the way you would expect it to😆
 

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Has anyone else noticed a growing trend on there of people saying "Have you no...?" instead of "Don't you have any...?" Not just in standard phrases like 'have you no shame', but things like "Have you no family who could help out?" It sounds soooo twee and affected and grates on me every time.

(If it hasn't annoyed you before it's going to now, so you can thank me for that whenever you spot it in future :ROFLMAO:)
 
Galinda said:
And this is why I think half of them are bloody fantasists. Privately educated in a top Cheltenham public school for most of senior school and I can assure you the staff were nowhere to be seen and pissed off to the staff room, I never sat and ate with staff, I wouldn't have bloody wanted to!

I'm trying to remember the actual food and all I can remember eating is cheese and onion bakes, which were my gateway drug to the Greggs filth I enjoy so much now! Also always had Otis Spunkmeyer cookies with a cardboard carton pint of milk every day as I was so bloody miserable there and found that super comforting. Even now when I'm feeling low I'll have a glass of milk which is obviously a throw back to the days in that shithole. Private school isn't this idyllic Enid Blyton twee utopia they all seem to think it is, clueless bleeping arseholes
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I was at public school too and, while the staff ate with us, we much preferred it when they didn't. We ate at long tables in the dining hall with staff members at each end supervising us (prefects and sixth form at breakfast, dinner and weekends when the teaching staff were at home). We even had to change jerseys for dinner. There was a rota for serving and clearing your table from the servery, two plates at a time. The food was utterly crap. The staff kept their beady eyes on us and woe betide anyone who put their elbows on the table or held their knife like a pen.

I learned before going there at the age of nine how to eat at home and in a restaurant (including being served and having my plate cleared) from my parents, not from school.
 
That ⬆ is one of the most judgemental threads I've read on there. Not everybody gets a decent maternity leave package, I certainly didn't. I handed my 6 month old baby over to child abusers nursery staff because we couldn't survive on just my husband's wage. As far as I know, he still recognises me and him as mum and dad - although he does have a soft spot for Andrea the nursery nurse who taught him how to draw a spider.
 
Sglodion said:
Has anyone else noticed a growing trend on there of people saying "Have you no...?" instead of "Don't you have any...?" Not just in standard phrases like 'have you no shame', but things like "Have you no family who could help out?" It sounds soooo twee and affected and grates on me every time.

(If it hasn't annoyed you before it's going to now, so you can thank me for that whenever you spot it in future :ROFLMAO:)
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Is that not a regional thing? It wouldn't stand out to me as unusual but I'm Scots.
 
Blurp said:
I was at public school too and, while the staff ate with us, we much preferred it when they didn't. We ate at long tables in the dining hall with staff members at each end supervising us (prefects and sixth form at breakfast, dinner and weekends when the teaching staff were at home). We even had to change jerseys for dinner. There was a rota for serving and clearing your table from the servery, two plates at a time. The food was utterly crap. The staff kept their beady eyes on us and woe betide anyone who put their elbows on the table or held their knife like a pen.

I learned before going there at the age of nine how to eat at home and in a restaurant (including being served and having my plate cleared) from my parents, not from school.
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Fair enough. I was at that school late 90s early 2000s and assumed all schools were the same but obviously not. Thinking about it I went to a different junior school before that and that did have very strict staff wandering around making sure we were all behaving and we always had to say "for what we are about to receive may the Lord make us truly grateful" 🤮 before trying to force down some utter shite. My junior school sounds nearer to your experience (we had a rota for cleaning and clearing the tables, long tables too) but I still doubt it's like that now, especially as that junior school shut down due to low pupil numbers as it was that tit no one wanted to go there. I still think they're all fantasists with an unrealistic old fashioned idea of private education
 
Serene Serena said:
That too. It does make me laugh when Mumsnetters get the numbers wrong and tell people to log it with 111. Yeah, a clinician is really going to be interested in the fact your neighbour has parked on your drive.
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I‘m sure I remember a batshit thread a few years ago where a woman was being pestered by a male escort she’d once erm… employed and was asking if she should report him to 111.
 
cowtastrophe said:
I‘m sure I remember a batshit thread a few years ago where a woman was being pestered by a male escort she’d once erm… employed and was asking if she should report him to 111.
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"Hello, 111, how can I help?"
"My male prostitute is stalking me!"
"Okaaaaaaaaaay, and what are your exact symptoms? Abdominal pain? Chest pain? Thunderclap headache?"

I bet the call handlers for 111 and 101 get really pissed off with Mumsnetters calling up to log stuff all the time.
 
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