Mother in law experiences #4

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Keera said:
Thanks all, I guess we both just have very different family dynamics but I need to speak up more about what I feel is “too much”. I’m already very apprehensive about the baby coming and how much time my in laws will expect as I already know it’s going to be more than I would like (!) which I think is making me probably very sensitive to EVERY issue that’s cropping up. And as you say @Upintheair83 i don’t want it to end in hurt feelings on either side!

Things still aren’t cleared between me and partner but I think I will speak to him tonight about my reasoning as I think he just thinks I “hate his mum” and don’t want her around.
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Tell him you love his mum, she is so caring blah blah blah…
I am so looking forward to our new home, birth of our child…hope I will be as good a mum to baby as she is to you…
Then….she made a great family home for you…I want to do the same for us….
Set up our new home blah blah….our way, our new traditions, like your mum had for you, we will do this for our child…
Can’t wait to choose our new pram/nursery/whatever together. I know your mum will love it, she will be so proud of you, her baby son now going to be a daddy….seeing him setting up a home for us, just as she did…
 
Unicorn_Poop said:
My mother in law wore black to our wedding. Says it all 🤣
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MiL Mk1 wore this pink chiffon creation that made her look like a cross between the Arc Angel Gabriel and a candyfloss, with her hair done like a Norman helmet. Pity was she was no angel whatsoever, in fact I reckon she was the Other Bloke's Agent-on-Earth at the time

MiL Mk2 did not even attend our wedding but showed up for ten minutes at the reception then cleared off.

They were so different yet so alike in many ways. One was totally obsessed with her little sunbeam and the other really couldn't give a tit about her only child. Having endured the pair of 'em I hope to God I don't come across like that to my DiLs
 
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I'm currently going through a divorce, but when I got married my then SIL showed up to the wedding in white see through trousers and a white see through top with a white (yes, you guessed it) see through bra underneath. A friend of mine had a few drinks too many and was loudly heard to remark "It's like two chocolate buttons looking at you"

MIL cried during ex husband's speech. Not a subtle cry, tears on her cheek etc. No, a loud gasping, weeping and wailing just to be sure that everyone would notice and that (as usual) all the attention would be on her.
 
DCICassieStuart said:
I'm currently going through a divorce, but when I got married my then SIL showed up to the wedding in white see through trousers and a white see through top with a white (yes, you guessed it) see through bra underneath. A friend of mine had a few drinks too many and was loudly heard to remark "It's like two chocolate buttons looking at you"

MIL cried during ex husband's speech. Not a subtle cry, tears on her cheek etc. No, a loud gasping, weeping and wailing just to be sure that everyone would notice and that (as usual) all the attention would be on her.
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I'm so sorry to hear you are going through a divorce, hope you're ok. I remember reading lots of stories on here about your dragon of a MIL! So I hope from now on you get a bit of peace and can live your life knowing you're free of her! Sending you lots of love x
 
Upintheair83 said:
I'm so sorry to hear you are going through a divorce, hope you're ok. I remember reading lots of stories on here about your dragon of a MIL! So I hope from now on you get a bit of peace and can live your life knowing you're free of her! Sending you lots of love x
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Old hag MiL mk1 was always thoroughly awful to me as I have often told on here so I expected her to be absolutely delighted when she got her little sunbeam back after I slung his arse OUT!
Strangely though she was bloody livid with him. He said she was disgusted with him and that he had "disappointed her greatly" BUT I heard from Other Sources some years later that MiL was EVEN WORSE to his old trollop than she was to me and never let up on her that it was HER Fault her little sunbeam lost his children! :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO: Not that I kept in touch with her of course, indeed I was very happy to be rid of the poisonous old hag truth be told but knowing she finally saw her little sunbeam for the lying, cheating asshat he always had been (like his father) was a decent enough punishment I think :)
 
Rita Chevrolet said:
Old hag MiL mk1 was always thoroughly awful to me as I have often told on here so I expected her to be absolutely delighted when she got her little sunbeam back after I slung his arse OUT!
Strangely though she was bloody livid with him. He said she was disgusted with him and that he had "disappointed her greatly" BUT I heard from Other Sources some years later that MiL was EVEN WORSE to his old trollop than she was to me and never let up on her that it was HER Fault her little sunbeam lost his children! :ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO::ROFLMAO: Not that I kept in touch with her of course, indeed I was very happy to be rid of the poisonous old hag truth be told but knowing she finally saw her little sunbeam for the lying, cheating asshat he always had been (like his father) was a decent enough punishment I think :)
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I absolutely love this! 🤣🤣🤣🤣
 
Where do I start?
Mine has knowingly fed me non-vegetarian food on multiple occasions knowing that I’ve been vegetarian for my whole life.
Came to our house (a very rare event, thankfully) and described the clothes in my wardrobe as tarty and tacky. When I told her I was offended she explained that she was just trying to help and that I need to start dressing for my age…I’m mid 20s.
She really is the gift that keeps giving. She’s made it such that I dread seeing her as I wonder what else I’m going to feel self-conscious thanks to her frequent unsolicited advice.
 
codered said:
Where do I start?
Mine has knowingly fed me non-vegetarian food on multiple occasions knowing that I’ve been vegetarian for my whole life.
Came to our house (a very rare event, thankfully) and described the clothes in my wardrobe as tarty and tacky. When I told her I was offended she explained that she was just trying to help and that I need to start dressing for my age…I’m mid 20s.
She really is the gift that keeps giving. She’s made it such that I dread seeing her as I wonder what else I’m going to feel self-conscious thanks to her frequent unsolicited advice.
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Ex MiL treated me similarly in that she tut-tutted my clothes and disapproved of everything about me because apparently I wwas not good enough for her little sunbeam (Nobody would hve been TBH). I think if wearing a nun's habit had been a fashion at the time she would still have registered her distaste, however had the OH's brother's GF worn the same thing she would have been billing and cooing how wonderful she looked!

You cannot win with these old bags - I'd say see as little of the old bat as possible, keep distanced and just try to let her snarky remarks wash straight over you, consign it to the "WTF does she know anyway?" department and let her get on with it - just enjoy Your Life and do not allow her to spoil it with her nasty ways!
 
Hi all am joining this thread. Basically, 6 whole days ago I upped and left a job, home, area and friends I’ve had for almost 8 years to relocate with my partner and toddler so we could be closer to his family. (I didn’t have a stable upbringing and haven’t spoken to much of my family for over a decade)

we’ve had to move into the in-laws because the house my partner has bought has no floor in one of the rooms.
It’s my birthday next week and before we had a moving date I’d arranged a meal with my friends from where we lived and my partner wasn’t invited as it was assumed he’d be at home with our toddler.
Now we are at the in laws - the MIL had a hissy fit tonight stormed off crying saying she can’t cope. We’ve been here 6 days with no end in sight. I feel like I’m not allowed a birthday, I feel trapped in a house that’s not mine and with no breathing space…
I never asked for any of this I went with the flow to give my son a better life than I had and 6 days in there’s an atmosphere and nowhere for me to ‘hide’
It’s ok though her son has managed to get to sleep no problem, despite having a 2 hour lie in this morning whilst I got up.
I’m scared I’ve not done the right thing and I’m dreading the morning.

duck all these difficult women I REALLY hope I don’t turn into one when my son is older! 🥺
 
~*~Jess~*~ said:
Hi all am joining this thread. Basically, 6 whole days ago I upped and left a job, home, area and friends I’ve had for almost 8 years to relocate with my partner and toddler so we could be closer to his family. (I didn’t have a stable upbringing and haven’t spoken to much of my family for over a decade)

we’ve had to move into the in-laws because the house my partner has bought has no floor in one of the rooms.
It’s my birthday next week and before we had a moving date I’d arranged a meal with my friends from where we lived and my partner wasn’t invited as it was assumed he’d be at home with our toddler.
Now we are at the in laws - the MIL had a hissy fit tonight stormed off crying saying she can’t cope. We’ve been here 6 days with no end in sight. I feel like I’m not allowed a birthday, I feel trapped in a house that’s not mine and with no breathing space…
I never asked for any of this I went with the flow to give my son a better life than I had and 6 days in there’s an atmosphere and nowhere for me to ‘hide’
It’s ok though her son has managed to get to sleep no problem, despite having a 2 hour lie in this morning whilst I got up.
I’m scared I’ve not done the right thing and I’m dreading the morning.

duck all these difficult women I REALLY hope I don’t turn into one when my son is older! 🥺
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You have it in Your Power to ensure that you don't turn into The MiL From Hell - it does not have to pass forwards!

All you can do is ride through The Storm of not having your own four walls (minus a floor) at the moment and get cracking on sorting out your own place asap so you can get outta there, meantime make the most of the decent weather to take your child out to the park, go for walks so you are there at the Castle of Doom as little as possible.
I had to move back to my parents place with a baby and a toddler when things turned horrendous with The Ex. I had no other viable option available & thats was how it had to be unfortunately, even though I knew it was going to be difficult because things were exactly the same as when I'd got married and left 7 years earlier. Yes it was back to the continual arguments, the sniping and all the Blame flying about just as it had always been but it was something I had to do to ensure we didn't end up in some grotty bedsit - in fact the reality was I was looking after FOUR children seeing as my parents behaved like 5 year olds themselves!

Its grim but you will get through it I can assure you, plus you'll learn a lot about how to NOT be the MiL From Hell in the process! Take the hospitality (or hostility) in your stride, head up and face it, then look forward to having four walls and all floors very soon when you can slam the front door shut and leave the lot of 'em squabbling outside :)
 
I’m 34 weeks pregnant with our first. My DH mum - my MIL. I was worried she’d be really overbearing though of course I want her to be involved in our child’s life, just as she has been in our nieces’ (9&13). However though she was happy when we announced pregnancy (after apparently speculating with my SIL if there was something “wrong”) she has shown no apparent interest in me at all. I keep thinking maybe she’s asked my DH about how I’m doing but I feel
A bit hurt I haven’t had any communication myself off her?

like yes I want boundaries but also I’m worried that she’ll suddenly be interested again when there’s a baby for her to cuddle (and she’s not going to like being told no kisses until baby has had all her jabs)
 
threeSMEGfridges said:
I’m 34 weeks pregnant with our first. My DH mum - my MIL. I was worried she’d be really overbearing though of course I want her to be involved in our child’s life, just as she has been in our nieces’ (9&13). However though she was happy when we announced pregnancy (after apparently speculating with my SIL if there was something “wrong”) she has shown no apparent interest in me at all. I keep thinking maybe she’s asked my DH about how I’m doing but I feel
A bit hurt I haven’t had any communication myself off her?

like yes I want boundaries but also I’m worried that she’ll suddenly be interested again when there’s a baby for her to cuddle (and she’s not going to like being told no kisses until baby has had all her jabs)
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I could have written this myself. My MIL was exactly the same all through my pregnancy....and suprise surprise! Yeh you're right!!- when my son was born she suddenly decided she was interested again. Unfortunately though, things never got better between me and MIL despite me trying to rectify things on a number of occasions. My son is 3 now and I think she's only seen him a handful of times.
Il be honest the whole thing was stressful and it caused alot of upset when he was first born. Even now i get upset about it and wonder shall I once again reach out and try and mend things? But she's had multiple chances and rejected them all.
So all I can say to you, is if you can sort it out early,but put in boundaries and communicate things- then do so. Iv found the whole MIL thing so upsetting! We were close before I got pregnant, it's like these women don't like to be centre of attention anymore. Good luck and let us know if it improves! Xxxxx
 
Omg I needed to find this thread.

been with my partner over a decade and I knew from the moment I met the witch that she hated me. I have never been good enough even though I have a list of things I do for her as long as my arm.
I feel like I’m constantly walking on eggshells around her, waiting for nasty and belittling comments.
Nothing else matters but her, how she feels and what she wants to do, the most self centred selfish person I’ve ever met, I’ve tried my upmost with her and i think I’ve finally given up, she’s reduced me to tears yet again because I want to put myself first for a change.
im lucky in the sense my partner does stick up for me and tells her what for but she never changes.
 
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