Jack Monroe #559 Untitled Jack Monroe Memoir

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Reagent said:
The Quarterback reminds me of when many many years ago I had the one of the most bizarre jobs as a civil servant. I was the supervisor in the staff canteen. My responsibilities were financial and administrative not culinary. I calculated weekly wages, banked takings etc and did monthly accounts which included inventory of everything edible. The guy I took over from trained me & showed me his method of inventory, he'd pick up a bag of raisins and say, "that'll be 500 g" while tipping a huge handful out and eating them, it was hilarious. We did this with every single item in the
kitchen , from flour to herbs to tins etc, and anything tasty he had a go at. Surprisingly the books never balanced. 😂
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Sorry but only a sociopath would grab and eat a handful of raisins. You are lucky to be alive!
 
DinosaurSenior said:
I used to work with a guy who spent his lunch break walking 30 minutes to the nearest Tesco, because a small tin of tomato puree was 6p cheaper there than the shop next to our office.

He would then come back and sit at his desk and eat his lunch for 20 minutes, thus incurring the hatred and rage of all his colleagues, because of his 85 minute lunch break, all for the saving of 6p a week.
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A FOF once heard that I had bought a pair of boots for £1 less than he had got them and called round to my house where he called me a liar. I showed him the receipt which I figured would end the matter. Nope, he then decided that myself and the shop assistant had doctored the receipt. I had to go through this bizarre scenario of his with him, step by step, explaining why it was nonsense before he backed down. He refused to apologise to me though because I had outdone him on a bargain and he couldn't forgive me for that.

I could fill pages of this thread on him - mostly because it involves him being utterly humiliated in his search for a bargain or easy money.
 
Valiofthedolls said:
As always, whenever she’s given even the most minuscule credit/benefit of the doubt, it’s unwarranted 😂 . The pine cones also adorn the (leftover) sprouts and roasties saag aloo.
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The Bramblymeece appear to have been at the sprout pizza before she managed to take the pic. 🐭🐁🐭🐁
View attachment 2668921 qAlso, what in the name of oily effluent is that seeping out of the left hand side?!
www.mirror.co.uk

Liven up your Christmas left-overs with these top recipes from Jack Monroe

Wasting food isn’t an option for most, so we asked crafty cook and poverty campaigner Jack Monroe how to make the most of festive trimmings on Boxing Day including turkey and brussels sprouts
www.mirror.co.uk www.mirror.co.uk
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Those photos are all credited to John Alevroyiannis. Surely not?!
 

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House of Carbonara said:
Also, weirdly shaped waist courtesy of Photoshop (other apps available).
😁
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Well of course m'dear. It is a widely acknowledged fact that when a trip to the supermarket is a fearful and highly traumatic experience due to C-PTSD as a result of living in poverty and having one's card declined at the till in the past, one always takes the time to slim one's waist and slap on a cheesy grin for a cheeky thot shot.
 
Lazarus said:
Those photos are all credited to John Alevroyiannis. Surely not?!
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Just went back for a proper look. He was DEAD (like slumlord grandad) months before that article came out, and that stupid-ass top pic had her and Leggy’s name on it. Leggy LEFT in June 2015 so that shite must have sat for ages, or been recycled from somewhere else before being published in December 2017.
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Don’t think John the Greek was related to Jack tho, otherwise he’d have been John the Greek Cypriot, third generation immigrant Irish (by marriage) on Big Dave’s side of the family. ETA sorry, cross-mither with @Day3TShirt.

Pretty sure that pic ⬆ at least is from when she tagged along with actual chef Leggy to this 2014 event, clearly during her headscarf and moronic expressions phase. @MancBee bonus Chesney for you!
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hiyaaaacath said:
Is it just me…I can’t help but imagine her as a hobbit with a big backpack on and hairy toes, walking to Asda with a big twisted wizards walking cane. Why is everything so bleeping extra with this woman.

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This is why you don’t have a job, guest…you useless nob, because you make everything a massive, boring, ridiculous, waste of time
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I'm sure she sees all the crap normal things the rest of us do in our lunch break or way home from work as her actual job. You know, stuff like food shopping, picking up repeat prescriptions, going to the post office etc.
 
CabalofBolorneaise said:
Lidl draw me in for the bakery alone which is unmatched but I’ve never even tried to do a full shop there, I have to admit.

(My local aldis don’t have bakery sections, I know some do, no idea how they compare to lidl bakery).
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I do think it's what you're used to. I normally do my weekly shopping in Lidl, with an occasional trip somewhere else to stock up on the things I can't get there - gochujang paste etc. I find if I try to do a weekly shop in Asda, I still have to nip to Lidl for a couple of things.
 
Well gee willickers and golly gosh. Wonder where Jack Monroe got the inspo for her wearing-a-headscarf-to-cook just like a GROWNUP chef phase, (circa Summer 2014 to Spring 2015)?
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Could it be from Allegra Sarah Bazzett McEvedy MBE, Jack’s partner from Spring 2014 to Summer 2015 (coincidentally encompassing the entirety of Jack’s scarf kitchen cosplay).
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Single White Leggy Jack strikes again. It’s actually more than a bit scary

duck me, daring chalk-painted Home Counties Helmet Hair (brought to you by Groupon)! Put your Scary Stalker Scarf back on!
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Awwwww look. It’s before Mr Boogles 💀and the wonky arsed ( )( ) laydee. Don’t worry little fella, you’ll be there before the year is out!
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I’ll stop mithering about this in a sec, promise, but in search of headscarf Jack… we know why prematurely middle aged provincial Tory twit’s been obsessed with home ownership since she burst into THE PUBLIC EYE she never asked for (bit gauche)
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But WTF is with the decade-long hydrangea obsession?
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closeronline.co.uk

Closer’s #MoneyMondays with Jack Monroe

What was your last splurge buy? A white slouchy jumper from Mary Portas at...
closeronline.co.uk closeronline.co.uk

In other news, @SouthendRealEstate FLAVOURS explained. As is charlatan nitwit’s approach to meal planning and food shopping, which, as you’d expect, is MAVERICK and not like other people’s.

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