Jack Monroe #275 Like a “lefty” Katie Hopkins

[ChactFecker]

mortal combat he’s dead? Completed it mate . I’ll be honest , it’s a one and done job so is in need of refinement but i Shan’t
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OH MY GOD!!!! FIZHOOTING from every oriface here

 

[Allgoodfuntiltears]

Finally, I am up to date after hours of hard grunking. I’m EXHAUSTED because I’ve been so BUSY with said grunking.
But it was worth it.

Yours, a lurker who rarely posts due to the speed of the threads.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

Fraus, having seen pics of Jack's dad, I was expecting him to be a lot older given that she's born in 1978. Or is it just that Jack really ages me with her tiresome antics?

I also think I'll have to add the dad to my Weird Crush List in 4th place behind Les Dennis, Ian Hislop and Cracker.

 

[colouredlines]

I hope this thread makes an appearance in the Jack Monroe's Troll Hell starring Jack Monroe documentary special. You can just hear her voice wavering as she says, "They...they talked about getting Margaret Thatcher's ghost to jeer me if I ever went on the TV again. They were going to hire a medium. I can't even go near BBC studios without a hipflask of holy water now."

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Les Dennis is NOT on the laminated list.

 

[Fruitjack]

Was that the one with a £5 mystery bag of stuff and they could use the standard pantry goods?


Eta: she would be fucked.
So you have brought me a kilo of chicken thighs, a few large potato's and some chicken stock...

At my disposal I also have at least 11 different herbs and spices, butter, oil, salt, pepper, flour, milk, and a full larder of random ingredients....

Nope, there is ~literally~ nothing that can be made here.

no. That was Ready Steady Cook. Which I know because I was on it.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

I hope this thread makes an appearance in the Jack Monroe's Troll Hell starring Jack Monroe documentary special. You can just hear her voice wavering as she says, "They...they talked about getting Margaret Thatcher's ghost to jeer me if I ever went on the TV again. They were going to hire a medium. I can't even go near BBC studios without a hipflask of holy water now."

They’ll have a guest appearance from Emma Kenny, psychoanalysing us all and blaming us for her husband cheating in misplaced anger

 

[Vanelope]

no. That was Ready Steady Cook. Which I know because I was on it.

Were you a green pepper or a red tomato, who was your chef? ( not for purposes I just used to watch it a lot). My favourite chefs were Nick Nairn and Brian Turner.

 

[Fruitjack]

Were you a green pepper or a red tomato, who was your chef? ( not for purposes I just used to watch it a lot). My favourite chefs were Nick Nairn and Brian Turner.

Green pepper. Lesley Waters was my chef because she knew how to do vegetarian food.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

They should have invited her on “Is it cake?”

Presenter: oh, my god Jack, this such a realistic brick.

Jack huh? It is a cake. Made from unctuous prunes and cardamom and bay and tea-soaked leeks.

Presenter: You gave the game away you silly fig! We were meant to guess whether what you produced was a cake or not.

Jack:

Producer: can we taste it anyway? Can we taste your cake that looks so like a brick?

Jack: Yes! Yes! Do we get prizes for the best tasting cake?

Producer:

Jack: was the best you have ever eaten? It was, wasn’t it? Can I say it was?

Producer: (to next contestant) Wow Bob, is this really Ina’s roast chicken or a cake I wonder?

 

[Cucumberthunder]

Thank you so much for the TV chat fraus. Made my morning.

Excited for another weekend chaos after a quiet Friday

 

[Dogmuck]

this might not be the year for Jack

HMRC must do more to recover taxes unpaid due to pandemic, say MPs

The total tax debt in the UK now stands at £39bn, more than double what it was before the pandemic.

www.bbc.co.uk

 

[SarcasticEllis]

Court appeal for someone unrelated but ‘taps sign’ Jack take note:

 

[Griftymcgriftface]

Jack seems quiet thankfully. Not in the mood for her tit today. Just woke up to the BBC news update on my phone about Taylor Hawkins

 

[Elastoblast]

Here's the sort of article Jack wishes they could write about the budget and her mate Rishi

https://www.12ft.io/https://www.the...rm-bracelets-kia-rio-tories-brand-rishi-sunak

 

[BananaSmith]

She should do can't cook won't cook.

Surely, can't cook won't shan't cook.

ETA beaten to it by a quicker cabal member.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

This just made me think... What if she gets on HIGNFY?!

I wonder if she’s got her own Post-Jeremy Kyle type show, where she has guests on but tries to outdo all the guests’ stories, and refuses to refer them to any experts because she’s monopolizing their time

 

[kachoochoo]

hi, I'm jack monroe. 90% vegan, £34 in the bank, working on the vertiginous bilge indigo

 

[Brian Butterfield]

She should do can't cook won't cook.

I think you mean SHAN’T Cook, Won’t Cook.

 

[Shawads]

maybe we could persuade Sir Matt to do a DKL special on Saturday kitchen for the 2 year anniversary?
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Please someone tag him in this on ig