Jack Monroe #263 Pest-on, Pest-off

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jenny2603 said:
Well figs and apples can be used interchangeably. A fruit tree is a fruit tree.

Anyway there's nothing to stop her having apple trees right now. She could get nice dwarf ones and grow them in a container. I say this because whilst I acknowledge apple Jack will be be as unbearable as all the other Jacks, the bees like a bit of apple blossom and she has the space and means to do her bit.
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excuse me jenny jack already works 22 hour days - how on earth could she possibly have the time to plant a tree! She isn’t superhuman like her idol, the queen 😡
 
Django said:
I think that Daddy might be selling off part of his portfolio and someone has her eye on the profit.
This is based on my perusal of the publicly available estate agents in Southend, m'lud.
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Yeah very likely, tbh from our experiences it feels like most of these character properties are only really viable for cash buyers who aren’t at the mercy of a lender’s criteria/low risk appetite. The market has been super distorted by the pandemic (both people wanting to move out to the country and into bigger houses, and the stamp duty holiday) and lenders are down valuing everything but there are enough cash buyers at the 🥺forever home🥺 section of the market to keep this artificially propped up. There are also enough ppl like us distorting it by moving from cities so we are trash for that too. It’s really tit but what can you do, not all of us are born to multi million pound papas 🤷🏻‍♀️

Who else thought the orangery was oranges growing outside? 😳 no wonder I couldn’t bleeping find it
 
heretoreaditall2019 said:
Yeah very likely, tbh from our experiences it feels like most of these character properties are only really viable for cash buyers who aren’t at the mercy of a lender’s criteria/low risk appetite. The market has been super distorted by the pandemic (both people wanting to move out to the country and into bigger houses, and the stamp duty holiday) and lenders are down valuing everything but there are enough cash buyers at the 🥺forever home🥺 section of the market to keep this artificially propped up. There are also enough ppl like us distorting it by moving from cities so we are trash for that too. It’s really tit but what can you do, not all of us are born to multi million pound papas 🤷🏻‍♀️

Who else thought the orangery was oranges growing outside? 😳 no wonder I couldn’t bleeping find it
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Other than in a chateau, I think orangeries are a bit gauche, dear heart.
Also, wouldn't a prospective lender want to see proof of income (accounts)?
 
Django said:
Other than in a chateau, I think orangeries are a bit gauche, dear heart.
Also, wouldn't a prospective lender want to see proof of income (accounts)?
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From Google -

“A conservatory is a glass structure with a brick base and a pitched glazed roof. An orangery is a brick structure with large windows and a flat roof with a glass lantern.”

It has a posh picture with it so guessing an orangery is the middle class version of a conservatory? How tf does she know about or covet these things it’s so weird
 
Smeghead said:
I think this may be the house with a few changes made to throw us off the scent
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I think it is more likely this one.
mod edit: link removed

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit tired and in need of renovation by the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

It is the correct location, ;) ;) ;) , and has recently sold, subject to contract, so will probably still have the for sale board outside.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
 
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When will Jack accept that she cannot afford to buy in the immediate area she lives in? Even if it's one of the cheapest, oldest, knackered houses. However, had she not frittered away so much on random crap she could've bought a nice flat or small house somewhere in the area. Of course that can't ever be addressed though can it?
 
MancBee said:
I think it is more likely this one.

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit in need of renovation be the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
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That's 100% the kind of house Jackie Queen of Slops feels she deserves.
 
heretoreaditall2019 said:
From Google -

“A conservatory is a glass structure with a brick base and a pitched glazed roof. An orangery is a brick structure with large windows and a flat roof with a glass lantern.”

It has a posh picture with it so guessing an orangery is the middle class version of a conservatory? How tf does she know about or covet these things it’s so weird
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The only time I've ever heard of such a thing was when I saw that Dick and Angel and their beautiful place.
Jack is so middle class she just can't help herself :LOL:
 
MancBee said:
I think it is more likely this one.

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit in need of renovation be the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
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795 plus the rest. We bought an older house, 60s and the first thing we did was rewire as it was actually dangerous. Another estate sale, has she been going round the obits?
 
MancBee said:
I think it is more likely this one.

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit in need of renovation be the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
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That'll still take a fair bit of cash to make it decent! Doesn't even show the kitchen either, so I'm assuming it's worse that Jack already has. But think of all the tin rattling that can be done with those cold, draughty windows.
 
MancBee said:
I think it is more likely this one.

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit tired and in need of renovation by the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

It is the correct location, ;) ;) ;) , and has recently sold, subject to contract, so will probably still have the for sale board outside.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
Click to expand...
Could well be - whichever one it is, they are all above 700k for a first time home. Pretty mad whichever way you look at it
 
MancBee said:
I think it is more likely this one.

It has a Orangery Sun Loggia and roses wisteria around the door apple trees and original windows. It is also a bit tired and in need of renovation by the look of the bathroom. Almost £800,000. wouldn't we all want that as a first time buyer.

It is the correct location, ;) ;) ;) , and has recently sold, subject to contract, so will probably still have the for sale board outside.

Jack has lost the plot if she thinks that is the sort of purchase that is within the reach of most people, forever home :sick: or not.
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Also not doing this home down at all as it’s lovely but in the description it says available for the first time in 60 years which means you’re gonna have a fair bit to do. Likely a full or partial re wire, annoying tit like pipes, new bathrooms, wall paper removal and plaster skimming, like yes it has a ticket price but you’re adding tens and tens and tens of thousands on top. Which is fine if you’re happy with that but considering she bemoans putting the wash on idk if it’s for her??
 
Imagine forking out all that money for a new home and being confronted with Jack and a foul casserole at your door. I just hope it's some toffs for whom that isn't a lot of money and can afford to move quickly if need be. The thought of some poor sod who'd spent their life saving up to afford it and getting landed with that buffoon as a neighbour is heartbreaking.
 
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