Jack Monroe #261 Serial loser

Does Jack eat the slop?

  • Yes, absolutely x

    Votes: 34 12.8%

  • Nah, pal

    Votes: 232 87.2%
  • Total voters
    266
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Yesterday's news but the Victoria Beckenhams (totally Scott lee reference to Michelle Heaton shopping in Asda) index will not feature the two quickest growing supermarkets because that would mean that convenience stores would need to be included 😆.

That's like saying my apple index won't contain the 5th and 6th most popular apples as that would mean I'd have to include all the oranges. 🤦‍♀️
 
Five hundred dogs said:
Pregnant Jack would be something to behold. She’d simultaneously be having the worst pregnancy anyone ever had, her doctors would undoubtedly tell her she had the worstest case ever of whatever pregnancy symptom she was experiencing that week, while puppishly, scrappily carrying on her good works of working twenty five hours a day to create recipes to feed the poors and tweeting to bring down the evil price increases of big rice.
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There'd be no radiators left in the world. They'd all run like fuck for fear of being wrangled to death by the bench presser of one full-sized queen.
 
Pocahontas said:
Are those double Mr Raas perched on top of an unmade bed her heavy-handed hint that she enjoyed some jiggy jiggy with the owner of Mr Raa’s bro?
Now, who else on this fair earth would own such a soft toy?
The boy done good 🤢

caveat: I really don’t give two black pudding nuggets what she’s up to, but her hints are très pathétique.
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...or that PapaPapa had a Mr Raa too and they're (oh sweet jesus🤮) finally together?
 
I know I keep bringing her up but it actually makes me really happy…LJC living her best life in NYC doing stuff, not eating slop (with actual friends maybe even a new gf) and now watching Elton and Dua Lipa. Meanwhile, all alone in the shitty bungalow, 90% vegan chicken and black pudding nuggets with a large side of big dog public speaker Jack, sitting in her crusty lace knickers, cuddles another teddy while breadcrumbing she has a very reliable man friend who gobbles up the dinners she’s made, at breakfast, along with her son. It’s quite sad when you actually consider her glum little existence.
 
Got the call to say I got the job 😁 Start in a couple weeks. Thanks cabal for all of the positive thoughts, they obviously worked!

So if I go quiet soonish, it will be because of all of the 20 hour days 😏

Mod edit: Please post any replies in the chat thread - food and drink
 
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Silver Linings said:
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This is what annoys me the most about her (well, top 20)
Her inability to write up the recipe BEFORE SHE POSTS ABOUT THE SODDING FOOD🤯

Nowhere else would you find food writers or chefs just putting photos of their food up without the recipe, then making a big hooha about how much effort it is to write it.
She makes reference to 'testing recipes' but as far as I can see, she makes one meal a day (made at midday, sat on the side until dinner time) and calls that work. Isn't that just.... Feeding yourself?
 
Dogmuck said:
I know I keep bringing her up but it actually makes me really happy…LJC living her best life in NYC doing stuff, not eating slop (with actual friends maybe even a new gf) and now watching Elton and Dua Lipa. Meanwhile, all alone in the shitty bungalow, 90% vegan chicken and black pudding nuggets with a large side of big dog public speaker Jack, sitting in her crusty lace knickers, cuddles another teddy while breadcrumbing she has a very reliable man friend who gobbles up the dinners she’s made, at breakfast, along with her son. It’s quite sad when you actually consider her glum little existence.
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What is all this business with the kidnapping 'boy done good' nonsense? I presume it is SB's dad but why the girlish coyness? :sick:
And if he is daft enough to tell her how adorable she is for buying tinned tomatoes - well they deserve each other tbh.

And why has the recovery been dropped? She barely mentions it. It's all arthritis now. Is recovering alcoholic not media friendly enough possibly? People might ask where she had the money for it during The Poverty. Which is a very fair question.
 
Jelly Bean said:
What is all this business with the kidnapping 'boy done good' nonsense? I presume it is SB's dad but why the girlish coyness? :sick:
And if he is daft enough to tell her how adorable she is for buying tinned tomatoes - well they deserve each other tbh.

And why has the recovery been dropped? She barely mentions it. It's all arthritis now. Is recovering alcoholic not media friendly enough possibly? People might ask where she had the money for it during The Poverty. Which is a very fair question.
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She’s always super adamant there was no drinking during the poverty…though considering the constant rattling and not-well-off-at-all-ing you wonder when she could have afforded the amount she said she was necking…!
 
Emmapism said:
Got the call to say I got the job 😁 Start in a couple weeks. Thanks cabal for all of the positive thoughts, they obviously worked!

So if I go quiet soonish, it will be because of all of the 20 hour days 😏
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Congratulations, so pleased for you...


I really hope Jack is not pregnant. Children are not possessions. You have a son Jack, be thankful for him.
 
FlirtyThirty said:
She’s always super adamant there was no drinking during the poverty…though considering the constant rattling and not-well-off-at-all-ing you wonder when she could have afforded the amount she said she was necking…!
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She did admit she drank during the poverty and I have always suspected the real reason she didn't involve her parents sooner was because of this.
 
By coincidence, I made chicken nuggets last week and defrosted some for lunch today. I made them small, and got 20 out of two chicken breasts...and unlike Jack, I use good quality meat, so they're not packed with water that seeps white goo into the pan while cooking.

16 from one chicken breast is such a fucking dumb lie. It's up there with the 25.000 steps a day rampaging around the shitty bungalow - you don't even need to spend time searching the Wayback Machine to disprove it, you can just go "nope, not true" and move on.

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