Jack Monroe #199 Just mind-bogglingly, gobsmackingly stupid

[Flash123]

She's spent her day interacting with and 'liking' tweets about Amy Winehouse and Dawn Butler.
She is such a ghoul.

Maybe my Twitter is playing up but it looks on my end like she had a made flurry of likes 7 hours ago then FUCKED OFF

 

[Geetbo]

Maybe my Twitter is playing up but it looks on my end like she had a made flurry of likes 7 hours ago then FUCKED OFF

She’s having a piss and a sandwich - IS THAT OK?

 

[Marj24]

Maybe my Twitter is playing up but it looks on my end like she had a made flurry of likes 7 hours ago then FUCKED OFF

Maybe her handler wrestled the phone off her and has confiscated it?

 

[HotesTilaire]

Who do we think the handler is? I reckon Papa

 

[Marj24]

Who do we think the handler is? I reckon Papa

probably someone kind and decent, but when Jack looks at them she sees this...

 

[onlysunshine]

Sorry I'm 4 pages late to the thread I co-nominated *shuffles through the front row to my seat, crossing everything that Jack is so self-absored I go unnoticed*

Totally feel the joy @Billybellend had when getting that successful nomination. Feel like I've only been able to suggest thread titles recently

I considered donating my seats to charity but nobody needs the burden of trying to offload that. I'd definitely take one for the team and watch the musical than sample any food. At least I don't have to mentally be in the room. Unless she quizzes everyone on leaving about the content of the musical...

 

[Lanie]

It has to be someone she will listen to. Perhaps her mum, or a friend who takes no tit.

 

[MancBee]

It has to be someone she will listen to. Perhaps her mum, or a friend who takes no tit.

One of those lawyers she has on speed dial? I think she might listen to one of them.

 

[Legionnairess]

Just to say I’m so very grateful that I blocked her from twitter. It’s lovely especially as we have so many mutuals.

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

One of those lawyers she has on speed dial? I think she might listen to one of them.

I agree with @MancBee, I think someone with clout has had a stern whisper in her ear that she’s sailing dangerously close to being in KH’s position with her Twitter activities and took action.

 

[Captainmouse]

It has to be someone she will listen to. Perhaps her mum, or a friend who takes no tit.

I thought all her ‘friends' were virtual or imaginary?

 

[Mr Krabs]

Maybe my Twitter is playing up but it looks on my end like she had a made flurry of likes 7 hours ago then FUCKED OFF

Time’s up!

 

[traumatised sideboard]

I reckon it's PR Vix or Agent: Rosemary Scoular, Assistant: Natalia Lucas (of fan mail sorting fame).

On an unrelated note, an old man was incredibly rude to me about my tattoos in a Waitrose car park yesterday. Am I... Jack? I didn't buy any pies so probably not. I'm still going to do a PCR (Plump Clam Response) test to make sure.

 

[HotesTilaire]

Sorry to hear that, Sidey T. Cheer up though, could be worse he could have thought you were a single mum and given you his thoughts on what your legs should and shouldn’t be doing.

 

[traumatised sideboard]

It's OK Hotes, I added the incident into both my ever-mutating origin story and my CV. Tattoos? On a bird?? Not in my century! I thought it went without saying that I had the last laugh. Later on I'll script a very spontaneous and witty response to post on Twitter which ends in everyone clapping and a beautiful lady giving me a very gay and therefore edgy kiss, further enraging the ham-spluttering windbag to the point of expiration.

 

[Orphan_Black]

It's OK Hotes, I added the incident into both my ever-mutating origin story and my CV. Tattoos? On a bird?? Not in my century! I thought it went without saying that I had the last laugh. Later on I'll script a very spontaneous and witty response to post on Twitter which ends in everyone clapping and a beautiful lady giving me a very gay and therefore edgy kiss, further enraging the ham-spluttering windbag to the point of expiration.

You must set up a tip jar so you can be duly rewarded for you bravery and heroics.

 

[HotesTilaire]

It's OK Hotes, I added the incident into both my ever-mutating origin story and my CV. Tattoos? On a bird?? Not in my century! I thought it went without saying that I had the last laugh. Later on I'll script a very spontaneous and witty response to post on Twitter which ends in everyone clapping and a beautiful lady giving me a very gay and therefore edgy kiss, further enraging the ham-spluttering windbag to the point of expiration.

Lesbianism! On a Waaaaitrose car park?
The old chief liked his fake PDA’s to be hetero, it’s always been that way *shrugs*

 

[Shesaidwhat?]

I reckon it's PR Vix or Agent: Rosemary Scoular, Assistant: Natalia Lucas (of fan mail sorting fame).

On an unrelated note, an old man was incredibly rude to me about my tattoos in a Waitrose car park yesterday. Am I... Jack? I didn't buy any pies so probably not. I'm still going to do a PCR (Plump Clam Response) test to make sure.

You kicked him in the shins though right?

 

[Lanie]

I reckon it's PR Vix or Agent: Rosemary Scoular, Assistant: Natalia Lucas (of fan mail sorting fame).

On an unrelated note, an old man was incredibly rude to me about my tattoos in a Waitrose car park yesterday. Am I... Jack? I didn't buy any pies so probably not. I'm still going to do a PCR (Plump Clam Response) test to make sure.

Im surprised you didnt give him a good rendition of your own poverty speech. About how once your were probably a bit skint and now your not and should be allowed nice things.

 

[Cookiecookie]

It has to be someone she will listen to. Perhaps her mum, or a friend who takes no tit.

I don't think it's family. They created the monster that is Monroe, I doubt very much she'd listen to them at all. I think @MancBee is probably closer to the truth, in that it's someone trying to prevent or stall a legal chaos.