Sideboard Bob
VIP Member
That’s very sweet of you to say, thank you. And I’m glad you know what I mean. It’s like, sure she might be weird and annoying, but as long as she’s not harming anyone, she should be free to be her weird annoying self.
Amanda Palmer
- Thread starter Sideboard Bob
- Start date
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CallMeHollywood
VIP Member
If you’ve not seen her Amoeba what’s in my bag interview with him, that’s very interesting. They both come off horribly.
TheStrawberryThief
Well-known member
I feel like this thread has Unleashed the Neil hate in me tonight.
Someone mentioned about his Doctor Who episode.
He likes to portray himself as a lefty feminist bloke who says things like " I like stories about women who save themselves" , yet he can not write a female character who feels like a genuine women.
A lot of his adult female characters come across as either manic pixie dream girls, potential girlfriend or mean witches.
Someone mentioned about his Doctor Who episode.
He likes to portray himself as a lefty feminist bloke who says things like " I like stories about women who save themselves" , yet he can not write a female character who feels like a genuine women.
A lot of his adult female characters come across as either manic pixie dream girls, potential girlfriend or mean witches.
brianbutterfield
Member
He’s been absolutely cleaning up the manic pixie dream girls (ie: very vulnerable younger women) based on his formula. Sorry Neil but modern women see through you.
brianbutterfield
Member
They did this q&a session when he finally returned to NZ a year after leaving her to parent alone.
The song says everything.
She is willing to swallow so much crap for him. It’s pure self-harm.
Vanelope
VIP Member
Her Patreon is like a little cult, but thinking about other Patreons that produce nothing ‘Jack Monroe’ - she does churn out a lot of blogs, songs, Q&As, Patreon meet ups and performances and she does giveaways etc and people seem happy to support her. I like the Dresden dolls stuff, I can leave the ukulele. She is talented while also being a narcissist and unbearable showoff. I’m glad she now has real eyebrows.
I also think she is doing her best for Ash.
I also think she is doing her best for Ash.
brianbutterfield
Member
Yes, aside from Coin Operated Boy, none of her output appeals to me whatsoever.
BUT, I’m so aware of the way motherhood clips women’s wings and Neil, a supposed progressive lefty, has stood back like a Victorian father and allowed AP’s career to nose-dive, while literally leaving the country that his infant son lives in, eschewing all responsibility in favour of his career.
Failed at first hurdle mate.
Copacapybara
VIP Member
Absolutely, I do find Palmer annoying but Gaiman to me feels worse because it seems so dishonest. When they split there was a bit of web drama as Gaiman had publicly added a book about living with narcissists to his Goodreads page. He claimed he was hacked, in a sort of amused way, but I’m not totally convinced. It had that typical snideness that comes in when he talks about her.
And all this is stuff that narcissists tend to do, setting up little tricks to control the narrative and playing dumb about it.
He was also pretty underhand with Graham Linehan who he was previously friends with. Yes they disagree on trans politics, but Gaiman posted up something on Twitter implying he was ‘concerned’ for Linehan’s mental health. It was really passive- aggressive and patronising, and obviously designed to cause a pile on while giving himself the kudos for being a ‘caring’ person.
This just seems so weird to me. If you hate someone’s politics say so, cleanly. If you care about them contact them privately. This just seems false and motivated by ego. I think a lot of his actions are motivated by a desire to control and boost his image.
She gave him a bit of a vicarious rock start lifestyle but as soon as her image soured he seems to have got bored, or found that she isn’t useful to him any more.
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Limey
VIP Member
He does come across as an absolute horror, but people hero worship him, because he's a male author
Copacapybara
VIP Member
The Linehan post was quite interesting, not so much for the subject in this instance but because it shows something of Gaiman’s private communication style. It doesn’t look much fun trying to discuss anything with him.He does come across as an absolute horror, but people hero worship him, because he's a male author
Might be of interest to you folks for that reason- it does discuss trans stuff so if it’s likely to upset you on either side just be aware. (Ie. Linehan believes that you can’t change sex).
Gaiman’s whole schtick (and that demographic of Sensitive Right-On Rich Bloke (TM) kinda reminds me of this:
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Flibbertigibbet
VIP Member
The Linehan post was quite interesting, not so much for the subject in this instance but because it shows something of Gaiman’s private communication style. It doesn’t look much fun trying to discuss anything with him.
Might be of interest to you folks for that reason- it does discuss trans stuff so if it’s likely to upset you on either side just be aware. (Ie. Linehan believes that you can’t change sex).
Gaiman’s whole schtick (and that demographic of Sensitive Right-On Rich Bloke (TM) kinda reminds me of this:
Linehan's debating style is like a dog with a bone, but I respect it because it's not sneaky and passive-aggressive like Gaiman's. Gaiman is proclaiming statements that he knows will please his fans, and not engaging with the actual *meaning* of them - because their only meaning to him is monetising those likes and "being on the right side of history" - which is both vain and impossible to assert. "It'll look good in my obituary" is not a moral standpoint.
I don't want to get into the trans stuff either, because there's a forum for that, and anyway you posted a Lush video, so <3
brianbutterfield
Member
And that fake (public) “concern” for someone’s mental health is part of DARVO. A well known method employed by cult leaders to discredit and defame someone.
He is text book narc so it’s ironic that he played that Good Reads trick.
I reckon that AP really did want a nuclear family in the traditional sense because that is the family structure that she grew up within. All kids from stable homes crave the crazy bohemian lifestyle when young, but ultimately when they have their own children they understand that raising children in a stable 2 adult family gives children the best chance of thriving.
Sir Lancelot
VIP Member
Neil Gaiman is brilliant in my opinion.
Writes amazinngly, and the few times I've met him (through work) he has been lovely and chatty and suitably down on himself.
But, go on... accuse me of hero woshipping the white male author
Writes amazinngly, and the few times I've met him (through work) he has been lovely and chatty and suitably down on himself.
But, go on... accuse me of hero woshipping the white male author
Copacapybara
VIP Member
Totally agree- I think even if you disagree you can engage in good faith if you can discuss. As you say I don’t think Gaiman is really helping his case much as he isn’t presenting anything constructive, it seems very performative and hollow, and largely aimed to benefit him.
Don’t want to send things too off-piste themewise, just thought his communication style was rather odd/interesting!
Your point about how much people can ‘make’ themselves be on the right side of history is an interesting one…I think we forget sometimes how much morals can shift in context, and that we aren’t as infallible as we think. There are so many people who thought they were the ‘good guys’ and had great press, but caused a lot of harm. Or who tried to market themselves as heroes and fell flat.
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The fake concern thing is interesting, seemed odd but I didn’t realise it was a classic sign!
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It’s fine to have a different opinion. Everyone has different sides and people are rarely just good or bad. It’s just that the press around him is so one-sided and cultish that it’s interesting to consider the other side sometimes.Neil Gaiman is brilliant in my opinion.
Writes amazinngly, and the few times I've met him (through work) he has been lovely and chatty and suitably down on himself.
But, go on... accuse me of hero woshipping the white male author
With all the general revelations about the way powerful media people behave, and the way they’re idealised, it’s useful to have a bit of critical judgement too as a balance. Partly because these kind of issues pop up in everyday life too and it’s good to be able to recognise them.
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brianbutterfield
Member
Power, money, kudos, a bunch of women fawning over him and no doubt the backing of the church of Scientology.
sweetnessfollows
VIP Member
I think they were two highly narcissistic people who had strong sexual chemistry & both thought they could change the other. When that didn't work, they had a kid thinking a family will unite them and it didn't. Then they probably became cruel to each other - less spite and more revert to form - she seems unable to stop doing events and stuff even when she's writing about how it harms her health and mental wellness, Neil just retreats to fantasy. The stuff during the pandemic was giving life though especially the "Everybody in the NZ coffee shop clapped for me"
I think both of them like the **idea** of parenting but they both seem really self involved. But they are both wealthy enough that there's no reason they have to change because they can afford the extensive childcare help. Their divorce seems unusually quiet given the outspokeness Palmer normally gears for. She writes a lot of vague emotional stuff and I just don't understand her fanbase that seems to feel she is talking to them.
One of the best things I read about her was the trans "journalist" she hired for her tour that she ended up throwing under the bus in her debacle with Laura Snapes. It was a long form entry about how it's all a performance and that writer had the true measure of her.
A little snark aside - during the pandemic she was a favorite time waster of mine and when Neil was in NZ and then fleeing, the nanny kept an instagram. So Neil flees, Palmer is wackadoo and the nanny is stuck there for a while. Time marches on and the nanny is writing about depression and returning to her home. She wrote some public stuff about being so thankful for all the help and people in NZ goes through extra effort to talk about how Neil helped her out with not one reference to Amanda Palmer.
That is the tea I want. That nanny probably Saw Stuff.
I think both of them like the **idea** of parenting but they both seem really self involved. But they are both wealthy enough that there's no reason they have to change because they can afford the extensive childcare help. Their divorce seems unusually quiet given the outspokeness Palmer normally gears for. She writes a lot of vague emotional stuff and I just don't understand her fanbase that seems to feel she is talking to them.
One of the best things I read about her was the trans "journalist" she hired for her tour that she ended up throwing under the bus in her debacle with Laura Snapes. It was a long form entry about how it's all a performance and that writer had the true measure of her.
A little snark aside - during the pandemic she was a favorite time waster of mine and when Neil was in NZ and then fleeing, the nanny kept an instagram. So Neil flees, Palmer is wackadoo and the nanny is stuck there for a while. Time marches on and the nanny is writing about depression and returning to her home. She wrote some public stuff about being so thankful for all the help and people in NZ goes through extra effort to talk about how Neil helped her out with not one reference to Amanda Palmer.
That is the tea I want. That nanny probably Saw Stuff.
skronkywildcat
VIP Member
He has written some amazing books (and some not so good ones). I love Stardust.
TheStrawberryThief
Well-known member
I have enjoyed a lot of his books and comics, and I do enjoy some of her music ( although I much prefer her older stuff). I just don't really like them as people anymore.
What I find really obnoxious is the way Amanda acts like she is the first women to ever experience a common female experience and is now an authority on it.
What I find really obnoxious is the way Amanda acts like she is the first women to ever experience a common female experience and is now an authority on it.