Alfie Deyes #4 A poorly made GTA character

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He looks really miserable and fed up already. I bet he's regretting this big time😂😂😂. His face, looks like he's going to burst into tears. Mummy Deyes, please come and look after him, I think he wants to go home😂
 
For someone that goes on and on about working out you'd think a couple of hours walk wouldn't even touch the sides. Does he realise lots of people working in a warehouse do this every single day in order to get all his junk delivered.

Just 13 sponsors despite several swipe ups and one for about £100 that's hidden - Zoe?

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Right, I'll come clean here😧. I'm worried about him. Is he out there in the dark without his home comforts😢. Will Zoe remember to let Nala out for a tit🤔. Will Mummy Deyes be losing sleep fretting over him capsizing in his kayak🙁. Can he survive without his expensive coffee machine😧. OMG I'm not going to sleep tonight. Please sleep well Alfie, don't have nightmares about capsizing and stuff. I believe in you🤥🤥🤥🤥. You can do it Bro. Us Tattler's are right behind you, you've got this Bro, send it. 😉. You've never given up on anything, we've got your back😏🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️
 
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Alightened said:
Right, I'll come clean here😧. I'm worried about him. Is he out there in the dark without his home comforts😢. Will Zoe remember to let Nala out for a tit🤔. Will Mummy Deyes be losing sleep fretting over him capsizing in his kayak🙁. Can he survive without his expensive coffee machine😧. OMG I'm not going to sleep tonight. Please sleep well Alfie, don't have nightmares about capsizing and stuff. I believe in you🤥🤥🤥🤥. You can do it Bro. Us Tattler's are right behind you, you've got this Bro, send it. 😉. You've never given up on anything, we've got your back😏🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️🚣‍♂️
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Siiiiickkkkk
 
He's had 19 sponsors now, over half of the money has come from two sponsors.

So arrogant going on and on that he'll do ads but stresses only if the company promises to give it to charity. Mate companies would rather give it to charities than you as it looks better for them. He's got pr and agencies why aren't they contacting brands to offer this? He just expects them to contact him without any effort on his part then become a hero for taking 10 seconds to do a crappy AD story.

why isn't he matching donations if he cares about the charity? Why doesn't he know more than a sentence about the charity?

if I was a brand I'd see what horrific value he is from having so few donations just after a pop-up shop that at most had 30 people visit. Millions of followers hanging on every post 😂
 
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Yel said:
So arrogant going on and on that he'll do ads but stresses only if the company promises to give it to charity. Mate companies would rather give it to charities than you as it looks better for them. He's got pr and agencies why aren't they contacting brands to offer this? He just expects them to contact him without any effort on his part then become a hero for taking 10 seconds to do a crappy AD story.
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It makes you wonder what the hell Carver PR are actually doing. Surely this is the sort of thing they would be best to help with, getting brands to sponsor and get publicity for the kayak event for their client and the charity.

Just makes you think Carver are taking their cheque from Alfie and doing duck all for him in return.
 
It's nothing more than a Joly, all in the guise of charity work. As usual he's done the very bare minimum.

Steve is just about as cringy as Alfie, talking about how small the source of the Thames is compared to the mouth, "ridiculous" indeed.
 
Yel said:
He's had 19 sponsors now, over half of the money has come from two sponsors.

So arrogant going on and on that he'll do ads but stresses only if the company promises to give it to charity. Mate companies would rather give it to charities than you as it looks better for them. He's got pr and agencies why aren't they contacting brands to offer this? He just expects them to contact him without any effort on his part then become a hero for taking 10 seconds to do a crappy AD story.

why isn't he matching donations if he cares about the charity? Why doesn't he know more than a sentence about the charity?

if I was a brand I'd see what horrific value he is from having so few donations just after a pop-up shop that at most had 30 people visit. Millions of followers hanging on every post 😂
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He even left that last minute, mentioned it yesterday didn’t he?

He could have had sponsors in place ie wearing there logo whilst he rowed (floated downstream) etc. As usual everything is last minute. They only bought their tent the day before it looked like.
 
Oh dear. 3 years ago his sponsor page would be on thousands within a day... almost guaranteed that the minions would rush to help. Now his fame is washed up. Merch aint selling, future self aint selling, can't raise £100.... people at work have raised more in a day for their charity walks!

cuzisayso said:
If he does finish the whole godamn thing
He is going to be selling tickets to his own seminar
So he can play a motivational speaker and tell the story about how he went kayaking once and it was so savage but yohhhhh he survived
And sell popsockets and t shirts with a kayak logo
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You just know he'll end up in America in the future, getting involved in MLM type motivation speaking companies. You can see it now.
 
If he started off with donating money himself, or saying something like 'every dollar you donate, I'll double the amount' he'd raise a lot more.

This whole kayaking thing really makes you see how he shouldn't be doing what he's doing. He got his followers by luck and good timing, not because he's investing in them or telling the right stories. He doesn't look like he gives a tit about the whole charitything. It's just another sick thing to do.

Or it's an excuse to abandon his halfpipe because he's too scared.

Talking about the charity thing: what is he really raising money for? I have absolutely no idea.
 
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