Teen Mum Young & Pregnant UK #24

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keytotruth said:
They said on the girls birthday live taht her sister is her carer.theres plenty of covid safe jobs she could get and if they were that worried they'd be shielding not going to basildon walking around bnm and when clothes shops open going to them and parks etc lots of mums to little ones dont work,benefits are clearly helping her stay at home.its a joke
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Until her girls are in school I don't think there's anything wrong with her being a SAHM mum to be honest?
 
pandanine said:
can i just say i'm really glad you posted this because the top part was something i hadn't considered at all. so now i can be more considerate towards it in the future x
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That’s okay! It took a while for me to understand it with my ex, it was like he was hearing different words to what I was saying. If I asked him to do something such as put our son down for a nap at a certain time, he would get very upset that I “didn’t think he was a good dad and couldn’t do it himself”. He was just really unwell and took everything personal, I was forever walking on egg shells. If he swore infront of our son and I said please don’t swear, it was then more swearing and he could “do whatever he wanted.” It’s easy for them to fog out the bigger picture when they’re mentally unwell, definetly. I think Brett is stuck in that fog right now, everything is an attack and he can’t accept he needs a bit of help himself because of his pride. They seem to think the world is against them for no reason. Which in actual fact, ill or not, people are just fed up of their tit.

I think Brett is a tool in his own way when he’s mentally well, but I’ve always stuck by its hard to be mentally ill but even harder to love someone that is.
 
Mia answered a question regarding coparenting for the sake of routine on her YouTube video last night, and I think she got it spot on, said basically that if you can coparent to keep the routine consistent then that is brilliant, but unfortunately when you split up with the other parent you can't make them parent the same way as you.

My child's father isn't involved so I've never dealt with this first hand, but my partner parents totally different to his kids mum, like bedtimes, treats etc are completely different in each household. And there is very little animosity between them so its not like any of the differences are happening due to spite. Mostly its because my partner works whereas his kids mum doesn't so he will have a later bedtime because he doesn't want to be getting them at 6 and putting them to bed at 8 and hardly seeing them. Could be a similar thing with Brett and Charlie.

I think Charlie just needs to accept that Brett is a very good involved Dad and ok it sucks that they can't get on the same page regarding routine etc but would she rather he wasn't involved and she had to do it all on her own? It's natural she's dissapointed he isn't working with her but no need to put it on instragram.
 
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just to remind some people that charlie is also not all sunshine and rainbows. Yeah i get that brett could be taking this as a personal attack against his parenting, but charlie is just always looking for a bite off him. yes they have a child together but maybe if they can’t communicate text wise, find another way. there both as bad as eachother, tho charlie needs to grow the duck up and realise not every single detail of whats left of their relationship needs to be posted on social media.
 
I think the thing is with routine at Harlows age, Harlow doesn’t understand it’s a one off, she’s too young to understand the later nights or extra treats at dads or nannys are because they hardly see her or want more time with her when they do. I do think up until they’re at an age where they can understand it, routines should be as similar and regular as they can be, because it can make the following week a nightmare for the full time parent. So, I can totally see it from both sides. Brett needs to look at things from others perspective sometimes and Charlie needs to stop poking and prodding until she gets a reaction she can show off and post on instagram.
 
Personally I’m with Charlie on this. Brett came across as the doting father until he left Harlow with Jane and because of the circumstances Harlow wouldn’t stay in bed. Brett passed the buck to Charlie even tho Harlow was round his with his mum and it’s his responsibility to get her a proper safe bed. After that uproar bretts moved out looks like a house share and that could upset harlows routine and if Charlie is noticing this it’s not unreasonable for them to work together to get a routine. When Brett was at janes he had her there to make sure he kept her to a routine, now he’s moved out he could have her running round all night. And the way he’s responded to her is shocking really, I mean your talking about your child’s routine it’s for the good on them. Not a good idea to post it to her story but neither of them are the most mature.
 
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_basic_ said:
Personally I’m with Charlie on this. Brett came across as the doting father until he left Harlow with Jane and because of the circumstances Harlow wouldn’t stay in bed. Brett passed the buck to Charlie even tho Harlow was round his with his mum and it’s his responsibility to get her a proper safe bed. After that uproar bretts moved out looks like a house share and that could upset harlows routine and if Charlie is noticing this it’s not unreasonable for them to work together to get a routine. When Brett was at janes he had her there to make sure he kept her to a routine, now he’s moved out he could have her running round all night. And the way he’s responded to her is shocking really, I mean your talking about your child’s routine it’s for the good on them. Not a good idea to post it to her story but neither of them are the most mature.
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I think Brett moved out of his mums to make it easier for them all. He’s growing up and has a child so needs his own space, I don’t think it’s fair to criticise him for that, it’s not fair to blame that on disrupting Harlow routine when it needed to be done. I think sometimes people forget that the parents have lives and stuff too it’s not always alway just about the child. I don’t think he would randomly start having her running round all night?
 
Angelagirl_86 said:
Mia answered a question regarding coparenting for the sake of routine on her YouTube video last night, and I think she got it spot on, said basically that if you can coparent to keep the routine consistent then that is brilliant, but unfortunately when you split up with the other parent you can't make them parent the same way as you.

My child's father isn't involved so I've never dealt with this first hand, but my partner parents totally different to his kids mum, like bedtimes, treats etc are completely different in each household. And there is very little animosity between them so its not like any of the differences are happening due to spite. Mostly its because my partner works whereas his kids mum doesn't so he will have a later bedtime because he doesn't want to be getting them at 6 and putting them to bed at 8 and hardly seeing them. Could be a similar thing with Brett and Charlie.

I think Charlie just needs to accept that Brett is a very good involved Dad and ok it sucks that they can't get on the same page regarding routine etc but would she rather he wasn't involved and she had to do it all on her own? It's natural she's dissapointed he isn't working with her but no need to put it on instragram.
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Yeah I think Mia's bang on there. It's a shame Charlie and Brett can't communicate and work together for Harlow's benefit, but given how toxic things have been recently I can't say I'm surprised. Also totally agree that there's no need for it to be Instagram, it's just not achieving anything.
 
boredgal420 said:
I think Brett moved out of his mums to make it easier for them all. He’s growing up and has a child so needs his own space, I don’t think it’s fair to criticise him for that, it’s not fair to blame that on disrupting Harlow routine when it needed to be done. I think sometimes people forget that the parents have lives and stuff too it’s not always alway just about the child. I don’t think he would randomly start having her running round all night?
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I think you have taken my comment the wrong way.
Absolutely it’s the best thing for him to move out and have more space, I did not indicate that was a bad thing, however house moves can disrupt kids (although it’s not clear whether this is the sole cause of any disruption or lack of routine so I’m not blaming him-or saying he shouldn’t have moved, why would I?)
Charlie is asking for cooperation with making a routine for Harlow and Bretts being petty to be quite honest.
Me saying “her running round at night” was an example not saying that’s what would happen. However a nightly routine would be beneficial and I would have thought they could at least agree on that, why go out of your way to make it seem like your gonna “do it your own way” if it’s going to be a similar routine anyway?
I would have absolutely said Brett does the utmost for Harlow until the time where he put everything on to Charlie that night because he was trying to get his end away, and his attitude and behaviour was shocking.
 
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boredgal420 said:
I think Brett moved out of his mums to make it easier for them all. He’s growing up and has a child so needs his own space, I don’t think it’s fair to criticise him for that, it’s not fair to blame that on disrupting Harlow routine when it needed to be done. I think sometimes people forget that the parents have lives and stuff too it’s not always alway just about the child. I don’t think he would randomly start having her running round all night?
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tbf he has just moved from his mums to his dads, but it may be that things are quieter at his dads
 
Anyone watch Charlie's lives?

She said she doesn't get up till 10-11 Harlows really good.
She puts her to be around 7-7.30, which is fine, BUT if she's not dragging her lazy arse out of bed for her kid until nearly midday, there is little wonder she is struggling to get her to settle on a night. I hardly think its fair to blame Brett for that!!
When he has Harlow you usually see his Sunday morning stories 0757 or whatever so HE clearly DOES get up when Harlow wakes up.

Charlie really does have some audacity to blast Brett about Harlows routine when what she (and Oliver) have admitted out of their own mouths is absolutely shocking in my book, probably leaves her there with the ipad to get extra sexy time with the boyfriend. Stimulate your child and sort out your own bloody routine before you go publicly pointing fingers at others.
 
Oh wow. Surely Harlow isn’t asleep that long? Average night time sleep for a 2 year old is 11-12 hours depending on their nap. (The nap boosts this upto around 14-15 hours daily including nap I think.) My son goes to bed the same time but is awake between 6-7am everyday. Is she just leaving her in bed so she can have a lie in? At what point does she get up and feed her/change her?

I just need confirmation on whether or not Harlow is sleeping for that amount of time?! 😂

Edit; Just to add, on some lives there has been times Harlow has woken up after already being in bed, in which Charlie keeps Harlow awake by letting her partake in the live. This won’t be helping the routine and would explain why on some occasions Harlow is sleeping in until that late I guess.
 
Judging by Bretts weekend stories I would have to say it appears she wakes up at a normal sort of time he posts them pretty often from what I have seen.

Charlie seemed pretty proud of the fact she doesn't have to get up early for Harlow and Oliver was fully agreeing with her but she didn't go into too much detail. I don't think she will see the irony of what she posted last night or that it appears she only has herself to blame 🤷‍♀️
 
justheretonamedrop said:
Oh wow. Surely Harlow isn’t asleep that long? Average night time sleep for a 2 year old is 11-12 hours depending on their nap. (The nap boosts this upto around 14-15 hours daily including nap I think.) My son goes to bed the same time but is awake between 6-7am everyday. Is she just leaving her in bed so she can have a lie in? At what point does she get up and feed her/change her?

I just need confirmation on whether or not Harlow is sleeping for that amount of time?! 😂

Edit; Just to add, on some lives there has been times Harlow has woken up after already being in bed, in which Charlie keeps Harlow awake by letting her partake in the live. This won’t be helping the routine and would explain why on some occasions Harlow is sleeping in until that late I guess.
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ngl my nephew does go to sleep early and sleep in until late and he’s only a month or two younger than harlow, different kids differ so may just be that
 
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