Retro Flame #6 #FreeKaelin

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Dear Diary,

The sweat after that tennis match with Tammy was so so bad but perfect for some AF content for Sweaty Betty’s. I hate Sweat Betty quality but sure it’s grand for a wear once and toss away.

Tammy was saying he wants to be more involved in this influencer stuff. I told him about my top secret new career and he was saying he could step in for me while I focus on that. I am going to train him in over the next while. He’s committed to the 5am glass of water and brief meditation, then back to the sack for an hour or two. So it’s a work in progress.

Just sent a few emails to other hotel resorts that I can promote some Bperfect bikini shots at for Spring break AND early summer vacay.

xoxo
Urka 🦊
 
Cheapest room is $1100 a night, sea view and all inclusive is double that, bleeping hell, can I be the new Urka?!
 

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Kaelin is going to buy less for the summer. Sure ya.....

Spare a thought for poor Kaelin left to her own devices back in New Yark.

She is like a girl going through a break up: going to the places she used to go with retro before the break up (rumble, whatever the feck that is and a coffee shop for a green goo drink & green goo snack); distracting herself frm heartache/separation anxiety by doing diy in her own place (hanging a mirror!) and, doing a closet clear out (to finally wash retro out of her hair)!! She even had lunch with David on Friday (he obvs feels it wasn’t safe to leave her by herself at a time she would usually be having iced coffeee with retro or tidying retro’s makeup drawer).

The biggest sign that Kaelin is at a total loose end this weekend is that she is posting photos on Insta during the weekend & not doing a weekend photo dump on Monday! This is the result of having time on her hands not having to clear up after retro!

The real shocker this weekend could be yet to come! Quick poll: Is it possible that Kaelin went out last night and made some new friends of her own?! Or, did retro text her reminding her that she needed to be in bed by 8.30 on sat night as they will be sow sow busy when retro gets back next week?!
 
How much doses she love herself how picture of one swimwear do we need to see
€200 for that bikini and it looks like the same black bikini I've seen her wear every single holidays. But it's an invistmint piece don't ya know...... 🙄🙄
My boyfriend would dump me on that beach if I asked him to take that many photos of me! "no tammmy the angle is wrong, take another 700"
 
€200 for that bikini and it looks like the same black bikini I've seen her wear every single holidays. But it's an invistmint piece don't ya know...... 🙄🙄
My boyfriend would dump me on that beach if I asked him to take that many photos of me! "no tammmy the angle is wrong, take another 700"
So would mine
 
No I cannot cope with this one. €81 for a bleeping hat you would honestly get for €4 in Penneys. And do not tell me a straw hat is an invistmint piece. The white see through throw on is €150. So that outfit with the black bikini would cost €431 FOR AN OUTFIT TO THE bleeping BEACH!!!!! I'm actually sick of this one. She is splashing the cash for the sake of splashing it. Tommy needs to reel her in or they will be leaving NYC in debt. What. The. duck.
 
The "investment pieces" grates on me. Buying a pair of shoes for €1500+ that will last year's and are timeless ✅ i get it. I don't do it, but i get it. Buying a €1500 pair of shoes that you put on depop 6months later and then just rebuy another pair is equally as bad as fast fashion. Is putting the word "investment" in front a cover for excessive spending and wastefulness??
 
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