rebeccaloves__ #43 soaked too much in, now RVK_Loves is in the Bin

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Justcyrious said:
Has she ever said why they don’t drink? So odd. Not that you *have* to drink, but stating that you *never* drink is a bit weird, isn’t it?
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Here you gooooo! The whole story as to why she and Benpecked don't drink, complete with outing their parents as pretty much alcoholics. Another gem from her blogging days! She also explains that not drinking is the reason why she eats so much gelato! :ROFLMAO:
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk

Roses and Rolltops : Personal // On Why I'm a Tee Totaller

xxxxx
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk
 
Justine said:
Here you gooooo! The whole story as to why she and Benpecked don't drink, complete with outing their parents as pretty much alcoholics. Another gem from her blogging days! She also explains that not drinking is the reason why she eats so much gelato! :ROFLMAO:
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk

Roses and Rolltops : Personal // On Why I'm a Tee Totaller

xxxxx
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk
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“My husband, THANK GOD, is the same. I mean, I’m sure that’s a huge part in the fate of why we met and are so compatible.”
YOU WERE THIRTEEN BECKY!!!!
 
Justine said:
Here you gooooo! The whole story as to why she and Benpecked don't drink, complete with outing their parents as pretty much alcoholics. Another gem from her blogging days! She also explains that not drinking is the reason why she eats so much gelato! :ROFLMAO:
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk

Roses and Rolltops : Personal // On Why I'm a Tee Totaller

xxxxx
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk
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Honestly... she is insufferable 😂 did she actually say 'here's a great habit that I hung on to after my eating disorder. Rather than have a drink full of empty calories I just go to bed and get up early and go for a run instead. Who says I have no fun?'
 
Justine said:
Here you gooooo! The whole story as to why she and Benpecked don't drink, complete with outing their parents as pretty much alcoholics. Another gem from her blogging days! She also explains that not drinking is the reason why she eats so much gelato! :ROFLMAO:
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk

Roses and Rolltops : Personal // On Why I'm a Tee Totaller

xxxxx
www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk www.rosesandrolltops.co.uk
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Thanks for sharing. Funny how she’s describing addiction while saying it’s not addition (“my parents struggle to moderate and enjoy alcohol. When to say no, feeling rubbish from it yet still craving it.”)

If you have an extremely addictive personality, have had an eating disorder, and don’t trust yourself to have a cup of coffee or a glass of wine because you’re worried about becoming addicted, please please please see a therapist 😫. That’s absolutely not normal, and anybody close to her who’s read this post and hasn’t said anything should be feeling guilty.

I would lol at her asking guests to bring their own bottle of wine but the rest of the post is too depressing.
 
Also having an addictive personality and eating disorder history and not recognising orthorexia and exercise addiction is really sad. I don’t have an addictive personality at all but I did get a bit obsessive about things like that when I was with an abusive ex as a means of gaining some control over my life. So it doesn’t surprise me she’s like that having been groomed.
 
This post is so troubling... What a huge coincidence that Ben AND her both swerve alcohol and caffeine. Its almost like he was a much older man who basically told his much younger girlfriend what she could and couldn't do, down to eating, drinking and probably every single facet of her life. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't tap into some then difficulties in her home-life ("don't you think your parents drink too much....?" "does that make you feel sad or neglected" ...... classic grooming).

How in ANY way does she know she would have had a problem with alcohol? She admits sugar is her alcohol yet doesn't gorge herself on constant chocolates and sweets. She got drunk as a teen and felt rubbish and decided at that point to swear off alcohol for life. Its literally what all teens do. A rite of passage. But of course as Ben knew, a sensible non-drinking Grabby wasn't going to be tempted by clubbing or partying or having a normal uni experience and seeing the light and ditching him.

The coffee bit is bonkers. I'm a huge coffee drinker and don't know a single person addicted to caffeine. Those I know who don't drink coffee just don't like it. Its not through fear of spiralling into a terrible addiction to get an energy fix.

Love the way she ends with a glib "How about you?? Do you enjoy gin or coffee?" - I must attract traffic/comments (but am judging you all horrifically!)
 
Ben doesn't drink, Ben doesn't appear to have any friends (until he acquired the RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING nct crew), Ben doesn't seem to have any hobbies outside of the allotment, building splinter furniture, being a sherpa. Does he do ANYTHING without Grabby?? All we know is that he sometimes watches American Football (oh gosh titters Grabby, he's such a boy!). Why doesn't he go on Stag trips? Why doesn't he go on work nights out? Why doesn't he go and watch sport with his mates? Why doesn't play golf/five aside or anything? Why doesn't he go to the gym? Seriously the man seems to do absolutely nothing but husband and parenting ... what a boring weirdo.
 
I wonder if Ben has distanced himself from his dad and brothers? Obviously he can do as he pleases (evidently) but leaving the family business makes me wonder if he wanted his own little bubble with his much younger wife and her parents? Or if it’s what SHE wants…..
It must’ve caused ripples with Bens family when he married Grabby. The age gap? Imagine explaining that to people!!
 
pinkrobot said:
This post is so troubling... What a huge coincidence that Ben AND her both swerve alcohol and caffeine. Its almost like he was a much older man who basically told his much younger girlfriend what she could and couldn't do, down to eating, drinking and probably every single facet of her life. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't tap into some then difficulties in her home-life ("don't you think your parents drink too much....?" "does that make you feel sad or neglected" ...... classic grooming).

How in ANY way does she know she would have had a problem with alcohol? She admits sugar is her alcohol yet doesn't gorge herself on constant chocolates and sweets. She got drunk as a teen and felt rubbish and decided at that point to swear off alcohol for life. Its literally what all teens do. A rite of passage. But of course as Ben knew, a sensible non-drinking Grabby wasn't going to be tempted by clubbing or partying or having a normal uni experience and seeing the light and ditching him.
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Agreed. It feels very much like what she thinks is fate/a coincidence is actually him moulding her to be a good little girl who won’t go out and party. Given they met when she was 13 and he was 24 he had all the time to enjoy the drunken fun before whereas she never had that. And she does admit that he did all the teenage drinking (but says he didn’t enjoy it 😏😏)


On a lighter note I love the paragraph about the cost saving and how they never buy all inclusive but enjoy it when it’s a freebie. Always tight!
 

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pinkrobot said:
This post is so troubling... What a huge coincidence that Ben AND her both swerve alcohol and caffeine. Its almost like he was a much older man who basically told his much younger girlfriend what she could and couldn't do, down to eating, drinking and probably every single facet of her life. I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't tap into some then difficulties in her home-life ("don't you think your parents drink too much....?" "does that make you feel sad or neglected" ...... classic grooming).

How in ANY way does she know she would have had a problem with alcohol? She admits sugar is her alcohol yet doesn't gorge herself on constant chocolates and sweets. She got drunk as a teen and felt rubbish and decided at that point to swear off alcohol for life. Its literally what all teens do. A rite of passage. But of course as Ben knew, a sensible non-drinking Grabby wasn't going to be tempted by clubbing or partying or having a normal uni experience and seeing the light and ditching him.

The coffee bit is bonkers. I'm a huge coffee drinker and don't know a single person addicted to caffeine. Those I know who don't drink coffee just don't like it. Its not through fear of spiralling into a terrible addiction to get an energy fix.

Love the way she ends with a glib "How about you?? Do you enjoy gin or coffee?" - I must attract traffic/comments (but am judging you all horrifically!)
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Yess! This is what I sensed but couldn't put into words. She's never been given a chance to be her own person because she was groomed at 13 by a 24 year old who had already done uni etc 🤮 and yes definitely vulnerable to an older man who would come across to such a young teen as 'knowing everything', like 'oh clubs and drinking are so gross only drunken slores do stuff like that not perfect virgin good girls from the home counties'.

As you pointed out the logic just doesn't make sense. There's just so much bizarre justification going on there. It's clearly all about control and anxiety. The stuff about I'm terrified to lose my inhibitions and not remember walking home. This sounds like a) a you problem, like do you not trust yourself at all to go out into the wide world? and b) soooo judgy. She also sounds like terrified of the world. She is literally the embodiment of the sheltered mumsnet woman lol. I wonder if that's why she loves to act like she is so well travelled, because her life experiences have actually been extremely limited because of her groomer husband, and thinks that her (repetitive, unadventurous and boring) holidays give her a personality and something to feel superior about
 
MissTeddy said:
Ben doesn't drink, Ben doesn't appear to have any friends (until he acquired the RIDICULOUSLY AMAZING nct crew), Ben doesn't seem to have any hobbies outside of the allotment, building splinter furniture, being a sherpa. Does he do ANYTHING without Grabby?? All we know is that he sometimes watches American Football (oh gosh titters Grabby, he's such a boy!). Why doesn't he go on Stag trips? Why doesn't he go on work nights out? Why doesn't he go and watch sport with his mates? Why doesn't play golf/five aside or anything? Why doesn't he go to the gym? Seriously the man seems to do absolutely nothing but husband and parenting ... what a boring weirdo.
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Ben is an absolute weirdo. Only a weird loner would befriend a 13 year old girl at his age. I don’t think it went down well back then but it absolutely would not today, school, and child protection services are much stricter now. I agree with all above, I imagine he controls the majority of their day to day lives. He certainly controls finances as she has disclosed in the past. She’s lucky to be close to her family and have a few of her own friends otherwise they’d be very isolated. It does make you feel a pang of sadness for her, she thinks she’s got it all but actually she could have had it so much better without him grabbing her out of the cradle.
 
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