One Day of Winter #3 Queen Raven still ruling the roost.... even the Pea has reproduced.

[Whatajoker]

Have we seen her stories about her 'prep' for a nursery morning? Jesus Christ. How long does it take to get a bowl out of the cupboard in a morning?
And she layers Ravens clothes because she 'famously' hates getting dressed? Erm...
Nothing wrong with the prep overall I guess but she's so patronising. Is she the only mother ever to get clothes out the night before? And where the duck is Dean? He's on paternity leave but does nothing and has Nicola out with two kids in the morning... How much is her not allowing him to be involved and how much is him not bothering?

I don’t think it’s not that Dean is not bothering. I think Pea wants and has total control over these kids. What she says goes. All the time. I think the latest story is hilarious. She has a ‘routine’ for the mornings. For a woman who is dead set against routine. I found it priceless.

 

[emme1122]

Ember is getting so big already it’s mad how in those first weeks they start piling on the beef! I know it’s not a race thread however I am pleased to see she’s out and about a lot. Pre birth (obviously third trimester is bleeping UGH so I get it) I was a bit concerned at how much she was “moping” around for want of a better term.

Also I didn’t and don’t co-sleep. The fear is too much for me although I’m aware of safe practices. Fully respect those who do. It bugs me slightly though how a lot of the co-sleeping crew are so “Yeah it’s fine just do it” about the subject. NHS guidelines say not to do it don’t they? Or heavily imply you shouldn’t. NHS guidelines can of course be dated or “wrong” or whatever but it’s just the lack of thought from the crunchy crew that gets me. Like there’s a new mum or dad out there who wants to do it all by the book and you’re really blasé about it.

My sister, who was a single Mom, co-slept and my brother & SIL plan to too. My sister's two both were still cosleeping at 7 years old as they just wouldn't adjust to their own room, for love nor money. That put me right off. Take my hat off to others but it's just not for me.

 

[Peakyblinders]

Sometimes she puts ravens knickers inside her trousers ready Cos she doesn’t like getting dressed? Wow. Words fail me

 

[Cubalibra]

She has a morning routine but doesnt let her child have a bedtime routine?

 

[Booboothefool]

Have we seen her stories about her 'prep' for a nursery morning? Jesus Christ. How long does it take to get a bowl out of the cupboard in a morning?
And she layers Ravens clothes because she 'famously' hates getting dressed? Erm...
Nothing wrong with the prep overall I guess but she's so patronising. Is she the only mother ever to get clothes out the night before? And where the duck is Dean? He's on paternity leave but does nothing and has Nicola out with two kids in the morning... How much is her not allowing him to be involved and how much is him not bothering?

Millions of other people do it too, why does she think she's mother superior!
Can you imagine "Oh I watched your stories and it inspired me to get my children's clothes out and lunches sorted for the next day, the night before, can't believe I never thought of it".

Anyone who has ever been to school or work will know it saves you time to do this

 

[elchapo]

Sometimes she puts ravens knickers inside her trousers ready Cos she doesn’t like getting dressed? Wow. Words fail me

I watched these stories and thought straight away that it was odd that Raven eats at the step. She must be naughty if she needs “containing” to eat breakfast and an activity to get her through it but then again, I don’t have kids so I don’t know. I thought the layering pants was odd too, she clearly has some behavioural issues if even getting dressed needs a hack to complete. Nicola is so cute. I just wish she was herself again (and by that I mean how we used to see her). I know we only know what she shows but she honestly seems like she needs an intervention and a cuddle. She’s hellbent on going against the grain and I wonder if it’s to claim some independence back, even though it’s her fault she’s become absorbed completely by Raven. I’m rambling but whatever, I have little else to do!

 

[Bibbydebob]

At least it sounds like Dean is getting a look in with the new baby.. what about when he goes back to work ?

 

[Heather343]

Her morning routine seemed so overly complicated. Surely the baby can stay with Dean or even stay in her baby grow and just have a snowsuit over the top and why can't pea get dressed in her room and not the kitchen. my toddler just sits and watches hey duggee before nursery whilst I get him dressed. He'd be fuming if I made him do an activity. They do enough of that at nursery.

Must admit me and my husband did the same as her when our son was born and he was on pat leave. Our son slept downstairs for the first week or so in his Moses basket. I would go to bed at say 8/9 and get a few good hours sleep and he'd wake me up about 2am and we'd swap over. I'd go down and he'd go to bed. It just meant we both got a few hours undisturbed sleep and worked well as I love early nights and he loved late nights.

 

[grumpycat]

I actually didn’t mind her morning routine. On preschool days, the night before I get my sons bag, clothes and breakfast bowl ready.
I think it’s just being prepared Toddlers often get distracted and whilst I find it overkill to put her on the step, i also don’t have a newborn to sort so I can see why she would occupy her.

it must be tough to live in a split level house like that esp with kids, especially the kitchen and living areas being so disjointed.

It’s clear she’s struggling a little which is to be expected with a new baby, we did a similar sort of tag team RE night time, makes more sense to each get a solid sleep in but I do hope he helps her in the mornings

 

[ceecee454]

I actually didn’t mind her morning routine. On preschool days, the night before I get my sons bag, clothes and breakfast bowl ready.
I think it’s just being prepared

i haven’t seen the story but can imagine as others have said it’s very much her usual sanctimonious i invited the night before organisation situation disguised as some
bullshit “my mama intuition is telling me to get my kids clothes out the night before”.
for me it’s the fact that people
have. been saying FOR YEARS how helpful a routine would be for them, and she’s discounted
it basically because it’s not what raven wants ... all of a sudden seeing the benefits of routine are we
people usually give advice based on experience, esp when it comes
to parenting and as much as it’s sometimes unwanted sometimes it’s better to just realise you don’t know it all and hear people out

 

[LalaLand93]

Deans proberly always slept in the spare room

 

[Serious_Susan]

Hmmm just watched her stories from last night. She sounds and looks visibly strained - and sounds a bit resentful of Dean having a lie in

I’m not sure when it became a thing for mums to make their lives as hard as possible to maintain this superiority over others.

 

[TheLastLolo]

Right, Dean's awake now surely. Why is she having to take Ember to get Raven from nursery? Crunchy points at the gates or?

 

[Cubalibra]

It could be one parent rule? Mine has implemented that...

 

[Toilettrips]

It could be one parent rule? Mine has implemented that...

So leave the baby at home with their daddy!! Like in the mornings.. she’s doing the night feeds why’s he then getting a lie in too!

 

[FraggleRock]

So leave the baby at home with their daddy!! Like in the mornings.. she’s doing the night feeds why’s he then getting a lie in too!

I don’t get this either, he’s on paternity leave, he needs to pull his weight instead of lying in bed until god knows what time, why can’t he get up and help Pea out on the mornings, if she’s doing all the night feeds and get Raven sorted whilst Pea is dressing herself and Ember?

 

[Serious_Susan]

Because doing it all herself is crunchy

 

[Peakyblinders]

I don’t get this either, he’s on paternity leave, he needs to pull his weight instead of lying in bed until god knows what time, why can’t he get up and help Pea out on the mornings, if she’s doing all the night feeds and get Raven sorted whilst Pea is dressing herself and Ember?

I think we all know this isn’t dean not wanting to or not being willing to. It’s pea not letting him. So don’t think we should be all “poor pea” “dean needs to pull his weight” the poor man isn’t even allowed to sit on the sofa Cos Raven doesn’t let him

 

[ceecee454]

Because doing it all herself is crunchy

this is the thing, there have been times my partner hasn’t pulled his weight and been a lazy bastard and i find it quite embarrassing that i’ve done everything in the house, with the kids and worked full time for months on end and he’s done duck all. when you’re not feeling emotionally 100% it can be difficult to confront laziness however the way she’s sharing it all makes me feel like she’s just doing it to come across as a martyr

 

[AfroCircus]

I remember she made Raven a settling in book for nursery and it said 'mummy will ALWAYS come pick me up', so that's probably why.

She will make herself ill the way she is carrying on. You don't have to sit in your pyjamas for 8 weeks post-partum (though of course you are quite entitled to!), but it SHOULD be a period of rest and recovery. Quiet bonding time with you baby. It is natural for older children to come second to the baby. This is actually one of the reasons I don't think I will want another baby for a long time - I like having my son to myself.

I am flabbergasted that she is having to 'latch (Raven) on' to get her back to sleep, whilst an actual newborn screams downstairs. That doesn't seem very gentle for the baby.