Melanie Murphy #20 My breasts are down here

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Where is she getting the “50 percent less likely to be depressed” figure? I can’t find that in any study. She’s pulling it out of her arse.


She talks about being a hardcore breastfeeding advocate but all she does is try to scaremonger women into breastfeeding. The long term studies on breastfeeding are very nuanced as to the benefits( which undoubtedly there are) but not to the extent that she claims ( cancers and maternal depression). This woman is saying she was depressed and felt that the best thing for her was staying on her medication, and sleep and out comes Mel out of her trap saying if you had tried breastfeeding you would have had a 50 percent less chance of being depressed. Lovely.


If someone says they stopped for sleep she says oh making bottles is so much more difficult. Yes it’s a bit of a faff but it can be shared between parents. She tries to tell people you won’t get any sleep anyways so you might as well suffer on. It’s like she has Stockholms syndrome or something. It’s condescending it’s minimising, it’s trying to gaslight people and say that their choices aren’t really valid. She’s horrific.
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She cannot tolerate anyone saying anything positive about formula because she has that much judgement for the mothers that use it, including her own. Like what was she afraid of there, that someone struggling with depression and hating the early days of breastfeeding would read that comment and decide to stop? The child will not combust. It’s not a crime for a mother to prioritise her own well-being.
 
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Dearreader said:
Just seen this under Mel's latest video

For context- the commenter explains how she was hospitalised due to depression when baby was a newborn and wanted to let other mothers know it's okay not to breastfeed and if it helps your mental health bottle feeding is a fine choice. Mel literally launches a passive aggressive dig about how sTuDiEs have shown people who breastfeed are more likely not to be depressed.


She is a bleeping bleep.

SS attached.


ETA - I only attached a part of the commenters post relating to breastfeeding. It was a long post so SS the relevant part to post here.
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So for me, I have PPD & PPA. I'm not on medication, but baby is nearly 7months and I think it's time as I am not myself. Anyway, I breastfed for 4 months & I think it's what caused my PPD. Baby had latch issues, I was constantly engorged as I over produced & had mastitis twice, and of course the lack of sleep. I thought cluster feeding would be the death of me.Absolutely shocking her response to that poor woman. She's disgusting
 
She has absolutely not an ounce of compassion for anyone. Even the “I was prescribed antidepressants and chose not to take them” is a real tit thing to say? Like why bring that up?
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It’s not “hormones at play”, it’s not optional. It is a severe debilitating well reported medical condition that needs close medical care and rest. Not martyrdom.
 
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rattleprattle said:
Where is she getting the “50 percent less likely to be depressed” figure? I can’t find that in any study. She’s pulling it out of her arse.


She talks about being a hardcore breastfeeding advocate but all she does is try to scaremonger women into breastfeeding. The long term studies on breastfeeding are very nuanced as to the benefits( which undoubtedly there are) but not to the extent that she claims ( cancers and maternal depression). This woman is saying she was depressed and felt that the best thing for her was staying on her medication, and sleep and out comes Mel out of her trap saying if you had tried breastfeeding you would have had a 50 percent less chance of being depressed. Lovely.


If someone says they stopped for sleep she says oh making bottles is so much more difficult. Yes it’s a bit of a faff but it can be shared between parents. She tries to tell people you won’t get any sleep anyways so you might as well suffer on. It’s like she has Stockholms syndrome or something. It’s condescending it’s minimising, it’s trying to gaslight people and say that their choices aren’t really valid. She’s horrific.
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She cannot tolerate anyone saying anything positive about formula because she has that much judgement for the mothers that use it, including her own. Like what was she afraid of there, that someone struggling with depression and hating the early days of breastfeeding would read that comment and decide to stop? The child will not combust. It’s not a crime for a mother to prioritise her own well-being.
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Sorry to be so callous but the reason she would find cleaning and keeping bottles sterile such a task is because you only have to look at her and *know* she lacks in basic hygiene.

It takes a few minutes to wash a bottle for FFS. Anything to demonise formula and low key shame mothers.
 
these attempts at video essays are driving me mad! you can see she is trying for a leena norms style without communicating clearly her "sources", there is no balance and is just using them to drive her own narrative! its soo patronising...im so glad I stopped drinking otherwise id be 1 of those cringy wine moms....clearly doesn't feel much empathy for these vulnerable woman that are being sucked in by marketing and social pressures!! Get off your high horse missus!

sorry for that rant perhaps some Sunday night fear 🤣🙈
 
Ok so, long time lurker- first time ever poster- Ive been following this thread for years and used to be a fan of Melanie like many others on here before I found out what she was like..... I really started to dislike her after the whole COVID, we shouldn't have to wear masks debacle- it really uncovered her self involved side!

I always felt kinda sorry for her for a lot of reasons but I cant be quiet any longer- this latest video has enraged me!! Im a mama to be very soon and I cannot believe the crap thats coming out of her mouth!! Absolute total and utter judgement of "wine moms" she's just salty because she cant have alcohol anymore!! You can tell by the video she's misses the hell out of a glass of wine!!

She never had an alcohol problem, she cant handle her booze and embarrassed herself a handful of times (who hasn't this happened to) and now uses sobriety as a nice lil video making tool! She's just mightier than thou because its her way of dealing with the fact that she made a commitment and cant go back on it because 1. Being sober is her new personality and 2. Tommy boy has probably warned her not to go back on the sup!

And when was she so into "triggers"?? Wasn't she the one who literally refused to put trigger warnings on her tweets back in the day??

Im telling yous now, after I push out (or get him cut out- whatever, i trust the professionals unlike Melanie) my baby, I will be going back to a glass of wine if I'm at a pub or a few pints and probably vaping too (away from my baby on a on a balcony). I don't need to drink, I still go out with everyone to the pub and have a zero beer and have a grand aul time but i also enjoy it!

I'm actually so glad I still watch her videos because she literally displays the kind of Mum I never want to be - making it her personality!! I already adore my son but I am so grateful I have a full time job, a car and hobbies! I feel like she genuinely has cabin fever stuck in that house and is going slowly more insane/judgemental!
 
I had to unfollow Melanie after her second was born because of the breastfeeding talk. I can’t help but wish she struggled with it the second time so she knew that the women who don’t do it often have a really good reason. My baby was 2kg at birth full term and was just far too tiny and exhausted to get milk no matter how good their latch was. We were put on formula from day 1 and I felt the most immense shame for failing. Yet formula helped my baby grow and thrive. I still feel that shame when I watch her which is awful. Usually just come hear to get the tea lol
 
astridivy said:
I had to unfollow Melanie after her second was born because of the breastfeeding talk. I can’t help but wish she struggled with it the second time so she knew that the women who don’t do it often have a really good reason. My baby was 2kg at birth full term and was just far too tiny and exhausted to get milk no matter how good their latch was. We were put on formula from day 1 and I felt the most immense shame for failing. Yet formula helped my baby grow and thrive. I still feel that shame when I watch her which is awful. Usually just come hear to get the tea lol
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Do not feel bad !! if my fella doesn't latch or is too small or even if i simply don't want to I wont be BF. She just obsesses over it because she has nothing else going on in her life- we are more than breastfeeding and you are doing an amazing job BF or not!!
 
astridivy said:
I had to unfollow Melanie after her second was born because of the breastfeeding talk. I can’t help but wish she struggled with it the second time so she knew that the women who don’t do it often have a really good reason. My baby was 2kg at birth full term and was just far too tiny and exhausted to get milk no matter how good their latch was. We were put on formula from day 1 and I felt the most immense shame for failing. Yet formula helped my baby grow and thrive. I still feel that shame when I watch her which is awful. Usually just come hear to get the tea lol
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I would question how truly empty and unhappy she must be to (a) make breastfeeding her entire personality and to (b) purposefully go out of her way to shame other women for just feeding their babies. That's not someone who's happy or fulfilled. Every post, video, story, reel is about how hard she has it, how much she does, how little support she has etc. I wouldn't let someone like mel who is clearly miserable trying to find flaws in other mother's parenting to make herself feel better and bring herself up.

You didn't fail.You were the one feeding your baby round the clock to help your baby grow. You got your baby thriving. You did the sleepless nights, you mothered your baby and your baby is happy and healthy thanks to you with the help of formula.
 
I just really don’t get this. I’ve never commented on her “advocacy” for breastfeeding, because I thought, maybe it is a healthy thing that mothers are discouraged from doing? Maybe it’s ok that she’s putting the message out there that it’s a good thing to do? I’m not really knowledgeable on breastfeeding/how it’s perceived in Ireland, whatever.

But this is just awful. Why would promoting breastfeeding have to mean aggressively shaming women who breastfeeding didn’t work for. And blaming them for their own depression because they couldn’t breastfeed? That is such a disgusting thing to do.

She just comes across like a deeply bitter person. And bored. Like this isn’t just talking about an issue she thinks is of public interest. It’s just putting people down if they don’t live life the way she does. Why couldn’t she just respect this woman’s experience? How on earth would that get in the way of her being an “advocate?”

I’m also so curious if Hannah Witton notices this stuff, and what she thinks about it. She seems to be much better at respecting different experiences, not talking about her own preferences with such condescension or judgement. And like she understands the very basic concept that people doing what’s best for them personally is less likely to make them depressed. How does it not bother her that her youtube bestie is out here telling people they’re silly for thinking their ppd is hormone related, throwing out made up statistics, and telling them they should have just PLANNED to do better breastfeeding, and prevent their own depression. Horrible. Does she not have anyone in her life who can point out how callous she’s being, and tell her to stop it.
 
Elinie said:
I just really don’t get this. I’ve never commented on her “advocacy” for breastfeeding, because I thought, maybe it is a healthy thing that mothers are discouraged from doing? Maybe it’s ok that she’s putting the message out there that it’s a good thing to do? I’m not really knowledgeable on breastfeeding/how it’s perceived in Ireland, whatever.

But this is just awful. Why would promoting breastfeeding have to mean aggressively shaming women who breastfeeding didn’t work for. And blaming them for their own depression because they couldn’t breastfeed? That is such a disgusting thing to do.

She just comes across like a deeply bitter person. And bored. Like this isn’t just talking about an issue she thinks is of public interest. It’s just putting people down if they don’t live life the way she does. Why couldn’t she just respect this woman’s experience? How on earth would that get in the way of her being an “advocate?”

I’m also so curious if Hannah Witton notices this stuff, and what she thinks about it. She seems to be much better at respecting different experiences, not talking about her own preferences with such condescension or judgement. And like she understands the very basic concept that people doing what’s best for them personally is less likely to make them depressed. How does it not bother her that her youtube bestie is out here telling people they’re silly for thinking their ppd is hormone related, throwing out made up statistics, and telling them they should have just PLANNED to do better breastfeeding, and prevent their own depression. Horrible. Does she not have anyone in her life who can point out how callous she’s being, and tell her to stop it.
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Sometimes I wonder if Hannah agrees with Melanie about some of it, and that’s why she isn’t bothered? 😬
 
Elinie said:
I just really don’t get this. I’ve never commented on her “advocacy” for breastfeeding, because I thought, maybe it is a healthy thing that mothers are discouraged from doing? Maybe it’s ok that she’s putting the message out there that it’s a good thing to do? I’m not really knowledgeable on breastfeeding/how it’s perceived in Ireland, whatever.

But this is just awful. Why would promoting breastfeeding have to mean aggressively shaming women who breastfeeding didn’t work for. And blaming them for their own depression because they couldn’t breastfeed? That is such a disgusting thing to do.

She just comes across like a deeply bitter person. And bored. Like this isn’t just talking about an issue she thinks is of public interest. It’s just putting people down if they don’t live life the way she does. Why couldn’t she just respect this woman’s experience? How on earth would that get in the way of her being an “advocate?”

I’m also so curious if Hannah Witton notices this stuff, and what she thinks about it. She seems to be much better at respecting different experiences, not talking about her own preferences with such condescension or judgement. And like she understands the very basic concept that people doing what’s best for them personally is less likely to make them depressed. How does it not bother her that her youtube bestie is out here telling people they’re silly for thinking their ppd is hormone related, throwing out made up statistics, and telling them they should have just PLANNED to do better breastfeeding, and prevent their own depression. Horrible. Does she not have anyone in her life who can point out how callous she’s being, and tell her to stop it.
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can you imagine if she does decide to try and get into Midwifery. I remember her mentioning it shortly after one of her children was born as something she could do should she decide to quit YouTube in future
 
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