Jack Monroe #73 If your attitude is off-kilter, try a cartoon filter

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heretoreaditall2019 said:
You’d be fuming wouldn’t you. I’d go to my line manager and tell them they can all get fucked if they think I’m spending a minute on that, how insulting to give a publishing professional your skiv work? If JM wants the privilege of a PA she can pay for one the tight cow!
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Good point. I very much doubt this is within the agent’s job description.
 
FeelingGroovy said:
Maybe I’m being a cynical toad, but this is all so convenient.
Oooh send me some love! You love me! You really love me!
Here’s my address!

OH NO! MY HOUSE IS FOR SALE!

OoPs - wrong house!

But now I feel sad because I want to own my own house and I can’t because it’s 10,673x my annual salary! And I will now take to my bed to sob about not owning my own house.

It all feels like unsubtle hinting. Send love, also money.
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i thought similarly
jack goes: "the meanies sent hate mail and now i have to move for the 33rd time this month! but i can't afford to, i'm poor remember, what am i to do?"

followers go: "oh jack, we love you so much, you are the best person whoever lived, we will set you up a gofundme and we will buy you a much bigger house than your crappy bungalow cos you are like literal god and you are the most deserving of all the poor people in the world!"

jack goes: "oh, no, i couldn't possi... well, maybe... oh ok, tipjar's this way! gifts to this address! bye!"

or something.

oh, while i was typing that, the pity party has indeed started
 
Emmapism said:
Do we know what her handwriting looks like? This reminds me of the time Mrs Hinch sent a fan card to herself 😂

Sorry I'm such a conspiracy wanker
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crystaleyesd said:
Hahahahaa she's taking a saw to the For Sale sign :ROFLMAO: - you're still a massive coward, Jack! Wonder if she'll provide the receipts, or this is yet another thing she's Novak Nailing about.
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She’s actually deranged, you’d just call the agency (they conveniently leave their number on the sign 😂) and let them know to move it? Why has everything gotta be such a bleeping am dram?

Also we are terrorising her family? Babe we’re begging YOU to stop discussing your child’s smegma you bleeping weirdo!
 
blurstoftimes said:
Is she suggesting that the journalists will write a story about a for sale sign being mistakenly placed in front of her house? :ROFLMAO: I'm not even sure the Daily Mail would bother putting that in the sidebar
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In Jack’s mind, she is incredibly famous. She can’t even go to the supermarket without (fictional) people sidling up to her to say how much they love her recipes and what a saint she is, etc. etc. The paps are camped out on her driveway hoping for a glimpse. 🙄
I honestly don’t think she realises what a minnow she is.
 
I feel bad that I keep saying duck off now.

Things are blue in the tunnel household. Parents were making the 5 hour trip to stay in a nearby cottage. Today’s announcement has put paid to that. Another 7 months goes by without seeing them.

I walked past a girl earlier in town sobbing and didn’t stop to check if she was ok. 😕

There are so many threads on here about different people and only a few moan and witch (and maybe write a memoir 😏). Yet she continues to sad fish, trigger and drop crumbs of nasty untruths that leave a bitter taste at best and make us feel guilty at worst.
 
Tabitha D said:
In Jack’s mind, she is incredibly famous. She can’t even go to the supermarket without (fictional) people sidling uk to her to say how much they love her recipes and what a saint she is, etc. etc. The paps are camped out of her driveway hoping for a glimpse. 🙄
I honestly don’t think she realises what a minnow she is.
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This has reminded me of another favourite Jack moment - when she said on mumsnet that sometimes she has to take herself off to the lake distract to escape from all the fame 🙄
 
Thatmoonringisdanielles said:
My take is:
Book is not going to be finished soon.
Agent threatening to drop her due to too many chaoses / chaosi

So:
Looked for lever arch files full of praise from ‘fans’ in order to prove she is a big deal, like a whole lever arch file of a big deal, couldn’t find it, and has thus resulted in using the Jackolytes to passive aggressively harass her agent into keeping her on the books?

I’VE HAD ENOUGH
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That makes sense.
There used to be a woman on our team that did exactly this.
She was beyond tit at her job and had got away with doing cock all for years. She was being moved to a different team where she could be observed better and was fuming.
All these bizarre emails were sent to our manager from her accounts. All saying that she was wonderful and a credit to the job.
She still got moved...
 
PoorPatrol said:
Did she take a picture of it? Those signs take a lot of hammering into place, did she really just come out and realise only once it was buried into the front lawn/huge driveway? What a load of tit! All the most random and upsetting things simply happen to Jack 24-7 🤦‍♀️
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This actually happened when I was a kid! We woke up one morning and found a for sale sign going up outside our house. We were all very disappointed to discover we weren’t actually moving anywhere and had to stay put...But, yes, we noticed as the bloke was hammering it in - it’s not quiet and discreet like, say, fashioning an enhanced black eye from shimmery purple eyeshadow.
 
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