Jack Monroe #595 Why you cry? BlueSky

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lilykestrel said:
anyway, realise I got distracted by the claiming to eat dog biscuits. say she did ... she took three?

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Didn’t even get past the utter nonsense of the “Friendly older gentleman” and his purchase of a “large packet of communal biscuits”.
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This stupid-ass imaginary bucolic Camberwick Green/Cormac McCarthy The Road dysyopian nightmare full of friendly older gentlemen, polite young women, unfriendly older women shrieking out “LEGS CLOSED, bleep OF SATAN!” in the street and elderly gentlemen surviving on toothpaste that she inhabits in her fantasies is just…bizarre.
 
My teenage memories of my mother:

Me: Hiding behind the massive poster rack when I saw her in Woolworths.
Her: whacking the bedroom door with the hoover early in the morning if she suspected I'd been drinking the night before.

Not many more than that because parents were a bit part in my teenage antics.


SBs teenage memories of his mother:
Her: Having a dump in front of his mates
Him: Not going camping
Her: traumatising him at AA
Him: Not watching his favourite comedy in peace.

Imagine if any of it was actually true!!
 
I am curious how she is going to monetise this latest incarnation.
Whatever the cause, her Patreon does appear to be dead. The last few comments on her only post ("I'm sorry I'm a lazy disorganised grifting bleep") are very negative and there's obv no content so hopefully offputting to any new marks.
Paypal grifting seems too obvious. She's been banging on about WORKING and THE OFFICE and SPREADSHEETS, rather than POOR ME I AM SO POOR I'M BOILING SOAP *rattle rattle* and the CarpMan incident has revealed she has a pot of cash, so a re-run of Hunger Hurts seems out of the question.
Bluesky doesn't currently do verification or monetisation like Twitter, and her audience of simps is much smaller (although more engaged and simpy than the Glasto-sized crew on Twitter).
Hmm.
 
Lumpyspaceprincess said:
Imagine you made up fantastical lies about how amazing your life was, and all you came up with is eating dog biscuits and watching tv with your child.

I can confirm I have watched quite a bit of tv with my child over the years. Astonishing.

I suspect she has literally no sense of humour.
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She 100 percent definitely does not have a sense of humour.

Actually... I feel like you might have hit very close to the bone in terms of why she (and her doppelgangers that haunt our real lives) are so unrelentingly awful.

A lack of critical distance - a lack of being able to see yourself as exactly the same sort of bumbling twit staggering through life as the rest of us.

Jack is what you get if you take yourself entirely seriously.
 
Captainmouse said:
was too late for the last thread, but, how long ago was the election? We have evidence of the length of her hair, as she plastered herself complete with red suit and clipboard all over SM. Yet she is claiming it’s shoulder length
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I've wondered in the past if she was using wigs more often than we realised, but I think her hair does actually seem to grow extraordinarily fast.

The election was on 4th July, so 4 1/2 months. For me, that'd be about 5-6cm of growth, but it might be as much as twice that for her.
 
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