witchofwestbyfleet
VIP Member
Thread title by @VeniVidiVicki. You win a restaurant voucher so you can eat some pasta not cooked by guest.
Recap! Guest returned to social media with new slop: watery pasta covered in some sauce that she slowly, gently, forensically, painstakingly, behind the scenes made herself and totes did not buy from a supermarket. Then plated up into a clean pan (two terms she doesn't know the meaning of) for dinner for her son who definitely lives with her. She thinks she might just return to this cooking writing thing but remember her burnout, ouchies, and bad mentals and be vewy vewy gentle with her please.
Said son is now into Oasis and she promised long ago to buy him tickets if they ever reunited and now might have to sell her kidney to get the cash. Because she is still, after all, a desperately poor little pixie without so much as a spare £156k for a house purchase lying around. She's now planning a "military operation" of alarms and spreadsheets so she can beat the Ticketmaster queue. Much amusement and Oasis song parodies were had by the canal.
She also went to a local council meeting where she sat behind one of the speakers so she'd be in full view of the cameras. Then played on her phone, picked her nose, napped a little, and laughed at her own jokes like the oaf she is. And she had us questioning what music an ice cream van plays.
As always, we reminisced about some of her past "glories" including:
Recap! Guest returned to social media with new slop: watery pasta covered in some sauce that she slowly, gently, forensically, painstakingly, behind the scenes made herself and totes did not buy from a supermarket. Then plated up into a clean pan (two terms she doesn't know the meaning of) for dinner for her son who definitely lives with her. She thinks she might just return to this cooking writing thing but remember her burnout, ouchies, and bad mentals and be vewy vewy gentle with her please.
Said son is now into Oasis and she promised long ago to buy him tickets if they ever reunited and now might have to sell her kidney to get the cash. Because she is still, after all, a desperately poor little pixie without so much as a spare £156k for a house purchase lying around. She's now planning a "military operation" of alarms and spreadsheets so she can beat the Ticketmaster queue. Much amusement and Oasis song parodies were had by the canal.
She also went to a local council meeting where she sat behind one of the speakers so she'd be in full view of the cameras. Then played on her phone, picked her nose, napped a little, and laughed at her own jokes like the oaf she is. And she had us questioning what music an ice cream van plays.
As always, we reminisced about some of her past "glories" including:
- How her son could not use cutlery at four years of age despite her being such an involved, hands-on parent
- The "ancient Nokia" that was actually a premium business smartphone on a level with the then-current iPhone/BlackBerry
- Guest vs Edwina Currie
- The pear and bacon porridge
- Burger Boy
- Beetlejuice (now back in cinemas!)
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