Jack Monroe #551 Careless Wispa

[Valiofthedolls]

It is fun when she gets hold of a word and repeatedly humiliates herself with it.

Honorable mention: Belaboured Tortuous Fauna

 

[Boogs]

Is guests coffee shop called The Rinsed Bean by any chance

I feel bad for cringing at the poetry written by a very young person with no particular aptitude for it but then I remember that she made up stories about talking to people while they died in burning houses so shrug emoji

She still writes like this as a mother with a teenage son in her mid 30s.

 

[SouthendRealEstate]

The solution to Pover-Tea is Lemon-Aid.

Sorry.

Bottled lemon-aid? I hope you’re not being sniffy about fresh lemons!

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I feel bad for cringing at the poetry written by a very young person with no particular aptitude for it but then I remember that she made up stories about talking to people in burning houses so shrug emoji

Here’s the insufferable twit waxing lyrical (with her sleeve of penz) at 28 instead of 21 if that makes you feel any better.

OH duck OFF, SHE REALLY IS SHY AND RETIRING. SHE REALLY REALLY IS

(go on, @Jelly Bean you can do it!)

 

[nothanksbabes]

The photo has always raised questions for me.
Where did she get it from? I'm guessing she found it on the ground. Did she go looking for a dead bird or did she just find it? Why would she pick up roadkill? Why has she got her face on a manky dead seagull?

The fact she has no aversion to dead animals (and not much compassion for suffering ones - poor kitten) tells us all we need know about her personality.

A performance with a dead seagull for attention is her all over isn't it.

 

[frostily]

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hyenas and badgers and pandas, oh my!

 

[drusy]

View attachment 2580446 qView attachment 2580448 qBut also,View attachment 2580473 q View attachment 2580474 q

Spoiler: City Sicker

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What a turgid load of old gobbledy-shite.
What a pretentious, self-absorbed knob she was, even in 2009.

 

[nothanksbabes]

I hate the idea that people should be embarrassed to try creative things, but you can tell she doesn't actually read. If she did, she'd realise she can't write for tit.

 

[StatusWoe]

Here’s the insufferable twit waxing lyrical (with her sleeve of penz) at 28 instead of 21 if that makes you feel any better.

OH duck OFF, SHE REALLY IS SHY AND RETIRING. SHE REALLY REALLY IS

(go on, @Jelly Bean you can do it!)

Where's the ''I'd rather be eaten painstakingly by marauding thorny badgers while being nuzzled by ephemeral pandas than watch this video'' emoji?

 

[Valiofthedolls]

I feel bad for cringing at the poetry written by a very young person with no particular aptitude for it but then I remember that she made up stories about talking to people while they died in burning houses so shrug emoji

 

[houseofhoop]

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She really doesn’t understand words does she.

 

[Flivver]

Perhaps she thinks all words are interchangeable - bit like herbs in her slop.

 

[houseofhoop]

Perhaps she thinks all words are interchangeable - bit like herbs in her slop.

And the more bizarre words you use the cleverer you look.
well she’s wrong about that

 

[DinosaurSenior]

Fackin ell..... Look what just appeared on my Facebook feed. Out of nowhere. And the comments. Bleugh

It's years old. Why now!? I don't follow Jackie or Google her

 

[rage naan]

How is her fridge empty when she always has all that food stored because she's so good at shopping or whatever

ETA while perfunctorily, cursorily, incoherently, promptly, idly looking for the quarter hack, Google showed me this accursed image for some reason, so I stopped my marauding immediately because one of her eyes was following me while the other, much larger, eye was staring accusingly out the window

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Isn’t that the awful picture that she liked so much she had on her own wall? Can you imagine being that self obsessed?!

Five years later…

 

[Florid Language]

Fackin ell..... Look what just appeared on my Facebook feed. Out of nowhere. And the comments. Bleugh

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It's years old. Why now!? I don't follow Jackie or Google her

I've just checked Twitter and someone has mentioned that there is a small flurry of guest stan activity. They observed that there was a similar pattern before the Currys binfire.
I'm hoping that they're wrong. I don't want her to make a comeback.

 

[Mr Krabs]

The photo has always raised questions for me.
Where did she get it from? I'm guessing she found it on the ground. Did she go looking for a dead bird or did she just find it? Why would she pick up roadkill? Why has she got her face on a manky dead seagull?

Since she’s dressed all in white I don’t think she just happened across it for a spontaneous snap. I think she picked it up, put it in her backpack and yomped around Southend with a dead seagull. Then got home, got all dressed up and did her makeup so she could take pictures of it.

It occurs to me that the ‘oh baby’ lyrics were thrown in because she fancies herself a bit of a songwriter. Having no musical talent, she was hoping a Billy Bragg type would come across them and offer her the price of a house with an orangery for the use of her amazing lyrics.

 

[Phillipa78]

How is her fridge empty when she always has all that food stored because she's so good at shopping or whatever

ETA while perfunctorily, cursorily, incoherently, promptly, idly looking for the quarter hack, Google showed me this accursed image for some reason, so I stopped my marauding immediately because one of her eyes was following me while the other, much larger, eye was staring accusingly out the windowView attachment 2580706 q

The squig artiste has even blurred out the Tiffany dupes!

 

[hereforthechaos]

I hate the idea that people should be embarrassed to try creative things, but you can tell she doesn't actually read. If she did, she'd realise she can't write for tit.

Trying is fantastic. Most people don't share their first efforts publicly or if they do they chart their progress. Guest remains forever 14.87 and a quarter (or however she mixes units of measure) and her work does not improve.