Jack Monroe #545 A bongo, a plastic guinea pig and a penis wrapped in filo pastry

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I’ve served up some right ghastly-looking shite in the past. A fish pie that just went wrong, some pastry that wasn’t playing fair, a lovely soup that looked like someone’s had twelve Guinness and barfed it back out… but y’know, with some baked rolls, or a little wipe of the plate, or some mash/gravy dumped on top… all tastes just bloody fine.

it’s STAGGERING how she looks at her creations and thinks YEP SMASHED IT and SHARES THE PHOTOS WITH A GLASTONBURY-SIZED AUDIENCE.

The only things she’s ever done more than once in her life is cocaine and engagements.

Completed it. Mate.
 
She invented brown sugar meringues you know!

Oh.
meringues.png
 
Geetbo said:
You’d think she was a bit of a wanker if she was cooking the best food in the world. But I’ve honestly seen more appetising bedpans than the shite she serves up.
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We’ve been down this road before, Geets and you’re not wrong😂

Jack Monroe #290 The Violet Elizabeth Bott of food, she will cook and cook until you are sick.

This is 100%a bedpan from the dysentery ward isn’t it.
tattle.life
CLICK WITH CARE!
And poor @EllaEm87

Slopalong #2 You can’t polish a turd, but you can cover it in parsley

JCMP please tender one x I found a couple of fascinating recipes on that website from Veganish "I want filth and goo, but you may think otherwise" Indeed https://app.ckbk.com/recipe/vega05080c03s001r009/the-big-jack https://app.ckbk.com/recipe/vega05080c01s001r011/breakfast-muckmuffin From the...
tattle.life
ETA I can’t find your three tin tender tho 💩
 
MancBee said:
Has anyone ever asked her where she got all the tramadol tablets from? I very much doubt a doctor would prescribe enough for her to take 40 a day, or whatever ridiculous amount she claimed to be taking.

If she bought them illegally, then she can sod off with her " I don't take drugs" nonsense. She seems to suggest that because they are available from a doctor to people that need them, that they are not "drugs". They very much are.

She says that she was addicted to "prescription drugs", because it doesn't sound as bad as addicted to class A drugs. But no doctor would ever prescribe that amount. so clearly she was either getting them from a dealer or going from private doctor to private doctor and lying. Either way, she was addicted to illegally obtained drugs.

Put like that it doesn't sound as acceptable, does it?
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Ironically, tit scummy mummy who spunks all her money on drugs might be the 1 nasty right wing stereotype she could legitimately claim.
 
CrackingOwlSanctuary said:
I am no drugs expert by any stretch, but my understanding of adding cannabis to food and a resultant high is you can't just chuck it in thinking it's oregano and then you're off through the doors of perception. You have to prepare it into something like cannabutter and then use that? I am happy to be corrected of course.

Edit: and of course the fact that she was responding to a kid at a religious festival about getting high and going cock mad is just ultra cringe.
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I don’t think it’s all that easy to make opium from poppy seeds, also I’m not sure that jangling addicts neck a bag of them to take the edge off when they cant get hold of actual heroin.
 
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