Jack Monroe #532 Borbenheimer. Sloppenborber. Borbenslopper.

[hereforthechaos]

Chapeau for thread title.

I was also bored this afternoon and perused her insta. Have we had Edie Sedgwick before?
View attachment 2344904 q
I would feel like this was a massive stretch and her ego is utterly beyond bounds but then I saw that sedgwick’s sister has written a book

Spoiler: Book

View attachment 2344914 q

So I guess they do actually have something in common

I can't imagine the cult writing a song* about her but we could update firewoman to (bin)firewoman?

*for the non rock canal members, the cult song Edie Ciao baby is about Edie Sedgwick

Edit, duck it I can fit jack lore into Edie after all

Edie(Slop Baby)

Always said you were a slopmaker, Edie
A stormy little prune drink shaker
Oh, the guardians darling queen, Edie
An angel with an ouchie wing
The content dog lay at your feet, Edie
Oh, we caressed you cheek
Oh, stars wrapped in your kumquat hair, Edie
Life without a care
But your patreons rewards not there

 

[rogueapostrophe]

Another 'friend'.

It's funny how all these 'friends' are always coming up with 'you look like xxxxx' stuff

That’s why why she needs three therapists and 9* AA meetings a week coz she thinks the auto timer is her friend. What a sad sack.

*Is this the first instance of Jack downgrading her BS, it was famously 12 meetings a week.

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Another 'friend'.

It's funny how all these 'friends' are always coming up with 'you look like xxxxx' stuff

I'll bet all of their guide dogs disagree.

 

[Livia Fantasy]

Maybe we should all pick a thread title each and have it tattooed somewhere on our bodies, then if we suspect we have spotted a Frau in the wild we could surreptitiously flash our tattoos as a signal. I quite fancy a woman stamp of “why you sob, Russell Hobb” myself.

Oooh I'd like to pick:

Am I awful and nobody has ever told me?

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

I'll have "Foghorn Beghorn" (Torn between this and "I mostly eat with a spoon these days", but I only have short arms.)

 

[Katkat]

I’m getting Foghorn Beghorn, around my belly button x

ETA: two for Foghorn!

 

[Geetbo]

Greengages and Ham is another banger.

 

[WoolyMammoth]

I hope I haven't missed someone else already coining something I think I've just come up with. But all these pictures of guest as geese.... geest!

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

NO! NOT THE BELLYBUTTON!!!!!

*feels sick*

I have a "thing" about bellybuttons. They're really creepy - and now mine feels all funny just typing about them.

*boak*

 

[Brian Butterfield]

I bleeping hate this thread title, thanks.

 

[SouthendRealEstate]

For @Geetbo

 

[streby]

In my head "guset" is prounounced "goo-say", all fancy and fake-French. I expect that's a nickname Guest's friends came up with on one of their rolicking fun adventures, immortalised by selfies of goo-say because they didn't want to be photographed for some reason.

 

[WoolyMammoth]

For @Geetbo

View attachment 2344949 q
View attachment 2344948 q

"yes just over there. At the end of the rainbow. There's a nor'n Irish leprachaun, a pot of gold and ALL of your overdue patreon rewards, squig"

 

[TheDragonWithAFlagon]

View attachment 2344922 q

Geets, mate, you ain't getting any younger. The wrinkling would turn the "n'" in "Shan't" into Shart long before the lines start to blow.

 

[Livia Fantasy]

In my head "guset" is prounounced "goo-say", all fancy and fake-French. I expect that's a nickname Guest's friends came up with on one of their rolicking fun adventures, immortalised by selfies of goo-say because they didn't want to be photographed for some reason.

Le Greuset

 

[MurielSnark]

Le Greuset

View attachment 2344974 q

either way, that gueset is cooked

 

[TheMiceInTheShed]

Did anybody do a recap, or did we all get carried away with our tattoos?

 

[KebabGirl]

Maybe we should all pick a thread title each and have it tattooed somewhere on our bodies, then if we suspect we have spotted a Frau in the wild we could surreptitiously flash our tattoos as a signal. I quite fancy a woman stamp of “why you sob, Russell Hobb” myself.

Slopbot tattoos. We all need one to prove our allegiance.

Whilst the why you sob thing is amazing, surely "I beg your pardon, she's got a hammock in her rented garden" is better

 

[TbilisiPeach]

'If you cut me, do I not bleed mayonnaise' was a banging title and thread where we commemorated Jack making BLM all about her disastrous Hellmann's collab. Wild times.

 

[plentyofpepper]

as a smol pixie sidenote, Guset is hemorrhaging followers on Twitter/X/whofuckingknows — 551.8K down from circa 600K following the post-QT influx. Of course, many are fleeing that app as it sinks deeper into a ditch, but I don’t think for a minute that tens of thousands of lost followers can all be due to that (or deactivations, banning, etc).

it seems to be a pattern — like the post-Nigella Patreon influx: people flock and then realise she’s actually a nightmare of a human being who actually does nothing productive or good, so they flee again