Jack Monroe #387 Her insufferable narcissistic festival of tripe she keeps advertising

[NellieBoo]

I really hope for his sake that Jay Rayner hasn’t offered her a ride up there in his big car or bought her a first class train ticket to sit with him all the way there from London. He might be a Jack fan, but not many people are deserving of that horror, and Jay definitely isn’t one of them.

Nigella, however? She should be forced to do it so she can sit, suffer and have a long hard think about what she’s done re the enabling/ Patreon. On a day where there’s no too.

Fear not! It's all sorted. 12 17 and 18 year olds are going to be Jack's Close Protection. Risk assessments have been completed mate . The lads have been cracking their knuckles awaiting her arrival.

 

[Unrinsed_Spaghetti_Hoop]

University of Essex video on YouTube re Jack's honorary degree

 

[Mallerenga]

If Jack is at home she'll have an early start tomorrow (or today...). The train takes four hours to Bristol from Southend, driving takes 3 but the last Sunday of the summer holidays I'd allow an extra 30 minutes at least.

Makes you think...

ETA my money is on a no show tomorrow. I almost wish I had a spare £60 to go but alas, my current account only has £27.75 in it and my business account is empty. Send cashos.

I really hope she travelled earlier. Just had a look at the route and that amount of transport changes is not something I'd want to do when pressed for time.

She got away with the no show at Left Field because that was a panel (Reni Eddo-Lodge was also a no show), but she can't stand Jay Rayner up tomorrow.

 

[NellieBoo]

I really hope she travelled earlier. Just had a look at the route and that amount of transport changes is not something I'd want to do when pressed for time.

She got away with the no show at Left Field because that was a panel (Reni Eddo-Lodge was also a no show), but she can't stand Jay Rayner up tomorrow.

There wasn't any smol pixie chaos on the shuttle buses tonight. Mr B would DEFINITELY have told me. He's an awful auld gossip.

 

[Mendacious Trumpet]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?

Edit: in response to fairly mild criticism of course

 

[jenny2603]

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University of Essex video on YouTube re Jack's honorary degree

Just needs Iqbal to turn up and it's perfect. SH1TTER.

 

[NellieBoo]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?
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Hmmm. Jack, you said there was a specific department within the police that monitored the social media accounts of people in 'public life'. And you were contacted, by your complete surprise, through this monitoring service provided by the police visiting your home.

 

[jenny2603]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?
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Edit: in response to fairly mild criticism of course
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@Mendacious Trumpet I take your point but we're up watching Jack argue on Twitter at this time. We've all lost our minds, it's just that we're laughing and Jack is attempting to construct some sort of parallell universe in which the Essex Celebrity Squad have set up a special force to monitor her haterz. So all things considered I'd say we were winning.

Squig NEEDS to take Jack up on her offer to explain all this because the story is going to be absolutely hilarious.

It's quite touching that she thinks if she can just convince people the police are interested in people laughing at her we'll all stop. No, Jack the only way to stop people laughing at you is to stop making a complete clown of yourself at every opportunity.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?
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Edit: in response to fairly mild criticism of course
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RED ALERT!

Pandas on Crack have LEFT and Marauding Badgers are back! I repeat, THE BADGERS ARE BACK!

Good to see nobody’s libelling her anymore through. I guess the paralegals have been in touch to have a few stern words with all of the internet.

 

[Ms Biscuit]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?
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Sweet sassy molassy. The self-pity is suffocating.

 

[Jelly Bean]

What on earth is she doing arguing on twitter at this hour?
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Edit: in response to fairly mild criticism of course
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Being 'daily stalked' is a 'cold hard fact'?
Does she mean people are physically stalking her? Or her utter nonsense on twitter is being questioned?
She seems to be doubling down on the necessity of personal protection. And that the po po have insisted upon it.

 

[NellieBoo]

I'm going to make a FOI request to find out about this collaboration of departments and monitoring of SM accounts by uk police forces.

 

[Cookiecookie]

Catching up from the last thread, and the baby talk. I think she'd get far less money sympathy if she tried to pull the impoverished single mum card again. Times are very different to what they were when SB was an actual SB. Things weren't great back then economically, but they're a lot worse now, and affecting more people than they back then. She also got incredibly lucky with babydaddy, who turned out to be caring and supportive, giving her opportunities to just gad about as she does. I doubt she'd be so fortunate again tbh. I'm not saying she won't do it, but I don't think she'd get the reaction she imagined.

 

[Mendacious Trumpet]

RED ALERT!

View attachment 1552504 q

Pandas on Crack have LEFT and Marauding Badgers are back! I repeat, THE BADGERS ARE BACK!

View attachment 1552500 q

Good to see nobody’s libelling her anymore through. I guess the paralegals have been in touch to have a few stern words with all of the internet.

Edit: insert failed attempt at Badgers gif here.


Also keep wanting to post a Matchbox 20 - 3am gif when she's carrying on like this.

And she's still tweeting, it's 3am she must be lonely

 

[Jelly Bean]

I'm going to make a FOI request to find out about this collaboration of departments and monitoring of SM accounts by uk police forces.

Seems to be verging on a police surveillance state if that is what she is saying.
Is she seriously suggesting Essex Police Force are monitoring twitter, and have, unasked, identified Jack Monroe as a person at risk? Not only that are paying for protection?
Based on what? People laughing at her and asking where charity money has gone?
She is potty isn't she?

 

[jenny2603]

RED ALERT!

View attachment 1552504 q

Pandas on Crack have LEFT and Marauding Badgers are back! I repeat, THE BADGERS ARE BACK!

View attachment 1552500 q

Good to see nobody’s libelling her anymore through. I guess the paralegals have been in touch to have a few stern words with all of the internet.

duck me, this is brilliant: "persecuted". Mandela jailed for standing up against apartheid, Monroe laughed at for rinsing her hoop.It really makes you think.

 

[That Forensic Man]

Being 'daily stalked' is a 'cold hard fact'?
Does she mean people are physically stalking her? Or her utter nonsense on twitter is being questioned?
She seems to be doubling down on the necessity of personal protection. And that the po po have insisted upon it.

The squigs are not having it

 

[Ms Biscuit]

Badgers!

 

[Soapy Dolphin]

Trying walking in my shoes they say.
Sometimes I try and put myself in Jack’s shoes so that I might experience the perspective of a disingenuous, shifty egomaniac with a taste bud disorder who is often wrong but never apologises.
Never goes well.

 

[Valiofthedolls]

Also keep wanting to post a Matchbox 20 - 3am gif when she's carrying on like this.

And she's still tweeting, it's 3am she must be lonely

Spoiler: Rob Thomas and the fellas beseech you

“NOOOOOO! Stop!!! PLEASE don’t associate us with Jack Monroe!!!”