Jack Monroe #271 David Cameron does far more charity work than Jack Monroe

[Veronicaaa]

What the hell happened last night? She went to some event at parliament where she obviously got smoke blown up her arse and immediately she's like 'I'm going to stand for parliament! Everybody loves me! A security guard recognised me! Actually it was MY event! My name was EVERYWHERE! I'm going to become the first minister of Scotland!' So embarrassing.

Her most recent 'liked' tweet.

 

[Nonnymouse]

 

[Onestorytoomany]

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I have neve been to parliament. I don't need to know the ins and outs of it, you could have left the whole story out and not a person would have cared pet.

 

[ednaturnblad]

she might finally get that Daily Mail article she's been fishing for!

The DM is awful but that fact that they won’t even dignify Jack’s ramblings with the sidebar of shame is hilarious.

Jack they literally don’t know you.

 

[Nottonightbabe]

Was she breadcrumbing with that job in parliament bit, was that the interview?

Anything is possible with her. Can you imagine though, she'd be smug as anything, thinking she's all important. Meanwhile the cabal will be at the thought of Jack having an employer to answer to and having to do some actual work. It'd be hilarious

 

[Elastoblast]

That's a lie in itself. Autistic people will take things literally but can absolutely tell lies and know that they are doing it. Most lack empathy so won't consider how their lie affects other people. She's such a tit.

My 9 year old autistic son can lie. Not at all well but he can. At the weekend he got told of by his dad for swearing while doing his homework. Picked up his frog shaped eraser looked straight at his dad and said 'I didn't say f*ck, I said froggie" nice try small fry. Autistic people can lie same as anyone else

 

[Vanelope]

I’ve heard tell of General Studies, everyone took it as it was basically a doss? You just had to read a newspaper or watch the news as far as people tell me? Schools just made you do it as an extra, it’s not really a subject as such.

All the people from schools down south doing them as an extra a level to say they got 4 and show off. . (Although I remember UCAS forms saying the qualifying grades excluded general studies so everyone knew it was a doss)*

*I could have made that bit up

 

[colouredlines]

Spoiler: Modern Studies Reply

I loved Modern Studues! Every time anyone mentions Tomintoul I think of it - we did an entire project on the differences between Aberdeen and Tomintoul.

I liked my MS teacher! And I’d been left school for a few years when I got a taxi home after a Christmas party and he was now a taxi driver (know how when you’re drunk, that’s the best thing, meeting someone you haven’t seen for years). Anyway, we went round leaving Christmas presents on the doorsteps of my neighbours and I never saw him again).

Spoiler: OT

I just looked up Tomintoul. duck me, this really is the ultimate doss subject? "Well class, Aberdeen is a city with 200.000 inhabitants, while Tomintoul is a single malt whisky. What other differences can you find?"

(I scrolled down a bit to get to Maps and realised that Tomintoul is in fact a place, which ruined my fun. LIGHTS OFF, send doggos, now off to cook a nourishing bowl of slop to slowly, gently, mindfully rediscover myself)

 

[GoLando]

Oh she has given us so many thread titles, thankspaceyou Jack, we are not worthy.

Anyway, I’d like to formally withdrawal my insistence that she isn’t a 34E or whatever, having now seen photos that she hasn’t filtered and manipulated to look like a very smol lil pixie, she does indeed look like a 34E.

(She also looks like Ben from A1 with those curtains)

Same old, brand new Jack

 

[KingBabar]

Anyone else get the 'she's about to bust into a rendition of: baby Shark, do do do dododo' vibe? View attachment 1141571 q

That hair makes me think of the monster off Bugs Bunny...

 

[Vanelope]

What....what the hell is she thinking she could do politically in Scotland? Run for some obscure seat cos she thinks there's less competition?

It's like passing your driving test on South Uist, where there's no traffic lights ( or roundabouts) , or me representing St Kitts and Nevis in the Curling.

Voters in Scotland would elect a turd sprayed with gold before they even considered jack.

She's such a massive hairy hole.

Why is she eyeing up Scotland apart from wind up the Scottish fraus? It’s very far from London, which is all she cares about.

Explainer - I Scotland, but like my beloved NE I hope it remains Jack-free.

 

[jordishaw]

Are they made from horses?

And "naturally distressed" is a bit unnerving here.

 

[Malkiavelli]

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“Being disbelieved can be such a big deal” - (autism, trauma, being a compulsive liar who forgets *all* of the lies she tells etc)

“so I’ve snapped back for once” - hehehe

but we can we all take a second to appreciate the beautiful hypocrisy that is Monroe, accusing someone else of using Twitter as a means to beg for attention not moments after posting a self-concerned, bullshit story about being recognised in the real world…on Twitter.

Oh lord, give me the self-confidence of such a shameless, self-unaware simpleton.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Why is she eyeing up Scotland apart from wind up the Scottish fraus?

It seems as though the SNP were the main arse-smoke-blowers.

 

[BeautifulTrauma]

This has been one of the best chaos grunks ever.

Jack lies like the rest of us breathe

 

[Elastoblast]

I desperately want her to seek candidacy. I desperately want her to stand for parliament. It'd all come out but she's deluded and arrogant enough to think it won't.

If she puts herself forward in my constituency, I'll happily forgo Tattle in order to expose the nasty truth about her. We currently have a wonderful SNP MP who is genuinely a likeable and honest person

 

[MooBelle]

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Never bleeping happened. Getting into the Palace of Westminster takes ages, even if you work there. Nobody gets 'waved through ' you liar. As you were obviously in the HoC (the carpet is green so it is the Commons) you would have had to go through the pain the backside security queue at the front of the building. Your photo is taken and a pass is printed which you wear round your neck. It has to be visible at all times.
You would then be escorted to Westminster Hall to whoever sponsored your entry in the first place. Guests can't wander round on their own. As you were part of a group you would wait until the rest of the group arrived and all would be escorted together.
The fact she thinks she was just wandering around by herself and tried to get into a meeting room without an escort is just not true and pathetic. That's not including the fact a police officer just opened a door for her without checking a pass and letting her in because she is 'a legend'.

 

[BananaSmith]

Wtf is a guardian avatar

This picture of Jack that the Guardian still use?

 

[Whaa?]

Well, she coulda shoulda given Gingerbread a moment in the sun, but no.

Her recent parliamentary appearances have been marked largely with her squee-ing about being in the limelight.
Perhaps at some point this will be noticed by those that promote her and think that she is a good spokesperson for their events.

 

[instacharlie]

So did Jack go to Parliament to talk about single parents with Gingerbread last night. Then instead of go online and outline what was discussed, she went online to bullshit, talk about herself and generally twit about?
Yet again Jack had the perfect time and platform to talk about a CHARITY........yet only replies to the blue ticks and praise about herself??
When will charities realise that Jack Monroe is not the right person to be associated with. They would get so much more from somebody else.....anybody else!