Jack Monroe #240 Schwankend

[Billybellend]

….or she could sell it and donate the money to the RNLI? Just a thought


Literally no budget….

I mean look. I have absolutely no issue with what she spends her cash on. That’s up to her. The issue I have is her spunking money on more cluttery shite when she was only just rattling the tip jar a few days ago because there was ‘no budget’. So did she find a ton in a puddle, or what?

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

 

[Toffee finger]

Nooooooo The Pipe of Port is lovely. I don’t want to run in to Jack when I’m there (though it would be good goss for the cabal..)

@HodgeSplodge thank you for the detective work and coming out of lurkdom to tell us!

 

[Legionnairess]

Those pictures of old cutlery are making me feel sick. I can just imagine the smell as well

God yes, that tinny icky smell.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

There's a girl on TikTok that makes beautiful rings from old spoon handles, probably makes a killing. There ya go Jack, money spinner for ya (involves some skill, talent and actual work though )

 

[karenina]

She makes me sick. This is reminding me of when she was posting videos of her gurgling in bed with the kitten. Only now it's shiny things. It's like scrooge mcduck diving into his money - except with things.

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Anybody else wondering what sandwich she had?

 

[ecdb]

What purpose did it serve to lie about how she acquired them?! Why the big hoo-haa about having things thrown in for free as a second thought from the seller? Why?!

Because lying comes naturally to her. Sadly I’ve a cousin who’s the same.

 

[Suffolkmum]

Mr SM has now seen her hoard and said “ do you think she’d be interested in buying our shed of doom”, whoever sold her that will be out celebrating.
He also said I must make it clear that nothing leaves us in that state, it’s all washed soft cloth polished and any boxes are hoovered out and cleaned.End of sales pitch.

 

[frankychester]

What purpose did it serve to lie about how she acquired them?! Why the big hoo-haa about having things thrown in for free as a second thought from the seller? Why?!

 

[ecdb]

Wot? No mention of Five Guys in Edinburgh? Too niche?

In restaurant parlance that’s a chain…

 

[Hollaaa]

We've all seen her rancid brass kettle

Cursed euphemism.

 

[ChickenPorridge]

The sad thing is she will have bought that cutlery for the sole purpose of showing Twitter and getting a few minutes of attention hits. Now it's done, she's a hundred odd quid down and has to find somewhere to shove the bulky boxes. What a way to live.

 

[L3moning]

Thanks for the new thread @Silver Linings

I posted this at the end of the last thread, but I really feel it is too good a counting opportunity to miss..... please forgive my indulgence!

I have 12 big spoons, 6 soup spoons, 4 tea spoons (where the fuck do they all go?) That's my main cutlery draw. Then I have a posh (£40 from Argos in a fancy satin lined box) set for Crimbo and the like which has 8 big spoons, 8 soup spoons and 8 tea spoons, plus 2 serving spoons.

Therefore, in my household of 2 normal adults, we have 48 spoons. This is excessive, I am going to list them on ebay for Jack to purchase for a hefty fee.

How many spoons do you have cabal??

4 desert spoons, one of which is at work, 4 tea spoons, a wooden spoon, a plastic serving spoon and a metal slatted spoon.

So 11.

 

[Flivver]

God yes, that tinny icky smell.

I’m feeling a bit queasy too.

Using those old spoons would be like licking a penny or 2 pence piece. That horrible coppery smell and taste. Yuk!

They’re mostly marked EP (electro-plated) rather than solid, flog-it-quick silver as the squigs think.

When the coating wears off that stuff, the base metal can be exposed and would not taste good. Might disguise the slop taste though.

£100 would probably go a long way towards contents insurance too. Too poor to insure is our Jackie. Not too poor to splurge on old cutlery though.

 

[karenina]

Because lying comes naturally to her. Sadly I’ve a cousin who’s the same.

I know someone who is that way too. I dunno - we all lie a bit, and not always white lies. But what is bonkers about her is the knee-jerk lie about everything-ness. Everything, even when there's no need to, and what you are saying is barely plausible! Surely, being as lying is perilous and you weave the old tangled web, you would save lying for when you were in a sticky spot or had messed up or wanted your husband to think you'd bought something in the sale when you hadn't, ahem. With her there is a constant need for it because she does not live in the real world and her followers - by which I mean her marks - need to see her life a certain way and, I guess, feel an urge to finance it!

 

[Ninch55]

I mean look. I have absolutely no issue with what she spends her cash on. That’s up to her. The issue I have is her spunking money on more cluttery shite when she was only just rattling the tip jar a few days ago because there was ‘no budget’. So did she find a ton in a puddle, or what?

Technically, she said she had no budget, so that could mean no limit rather than no money. What she would call ‘word wrangling’. What we would call Complete and Utter Twattery.

 

[Sideboard Bob]

It’s a full spoon chaos!

 

[karenina]

The sad thing is she will have bought that cutlery for the sole purpose of showing Twitter and getting a few minutes of attention hits. Now it's done, she's a hundred odd quid down and has to find somewhere to shove the bulky boxes. What a way to live.

This is bang on, I think. Was it worth it? She'll never have to wonder because she'll be confecting something new right now so that she never has to come down off the high of lots of truly gullible people telling her how amazing this unlikely occurrence was.

 

[Emmapism]

She also has the shield of the internet, the forgetful squigs and the ability to delete. A ready made gas lighting tool. She's a very sad woman.