Jack Monroe #240 Schwankend

[Into_the_tunnel]

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Bit old fashioned but anywhere can be romantic if you make it that way.

#greggsvegansausagerollisallyouneed

#youdontneedamichelinstarinthelakes

 

[Cloe]

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If she displays her grotty old utensils in her worn boots, what’s she going to stick her cutlery in?

I am by no means a minimalist, but all the images I’ve seen of her kitchen stuff gives me anxiety. No wonder moving is such a monumental task for her.

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Those just aren’t any boots, those are the Dr Martens Pascal in a limited edition blue print based off of an old 18th century English plate. I do have a fair few pairs of DMs myself, but always appreciated this pattern. They’re from FW2015, so post poverty but when she was probably scraping in patreon payments (I don’t know when that started sorry if that’s incorrect) and they would’ve been between £100-£150 new (leaning towards the higher end as limited editions are usually more)

ETA £125 new, fetching £180 and £270 on two different eBay listings now!

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Those just aren’t any boots, those are the Dr Martens Pascal in a limited edition blue print based off of an old 18th century English plate. I do have a fair few pairs of DMs myself, but always appreciated this pattern. They’re from FW2015, so post poverty but when she was probably scraping in patreon payments (I don’t know when that started sorry if that’s incorrect) and they would’ve been between £100-£150 new (leaning towards the higher end as limited editions are usually more)

And she used them for spoons.

 

[Veronicaaa]

Bit old fashioned but anywhere can be romantic if you make it that way.

#greggsvegansausagerollisallyouneed

#youdontneedamichelinstarinthelakes

Of course Jack's real answer is the salad bar at the Harvester followed by Eastenders.

 

[Clarends]

I like cutlery but I don't like washing up so are mine are stainless steel to go in the dishwasher.

 

['EllsBells]

Those pictures of old cutlery are making me feel sick. I can just imagine the smell as well

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Of course Jack's real answer is the salad bar at the Harvester followed by Eastenders.

Personally, the Pizza Hut one (with hidden Tupperware in your bag) was superior.

 

[Clarends]

Fish knives are common ,Nancy Mitford said so. Also, completely unnecessary as properly cooked fish should easily flake away with a fork. Maybe Jack does need them

Oh that sort of common. Like serviettes

 

[Suffolkmum]

Fish knives are common ,Nancy Mitford said so. Also, completely unnecessary as properly cooked fish should easily flake away with a fork. Maybe Jack does need them

She did. Soup spoons are also seen as common and napkin rings all Victorian affectations for newly rising middle class.
The upper class had fresh linen at each meal. The things you learn dealing in tat.

 

[Ispyabudgetbeanblogger]

Wot? No mention of Five Guys in Edinburgh? Too niche?

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Wot? No mention of Five Guys in Edinburgh? Too niche?

They always have the big light on in there.

 

['EllsBells]

I concur. That story is genuinely upsetting. Hope the squig's family intervene. I understand not everyone has space or can make use of family heirlooms, but this is something else.


@MancBee please take some beta blockers and step away from the thread. I fear for your wellbeing.

Also, amazing find @HodgeSplodge. She really can't help but lie about every single thing.

If the squig wants to rid of valued family treasures with huge but sad history could they not offer them to a museum somewhere who would be so pleased for the donation?

 

[Mr Krabs]

Fucking hell, I'd forgotten about that picture of the fire place....it reminds of paintings by Heronymous Bosch. Or Steptoes yard...

I was going to do a Steptoe and Son photoshop (maybe that should be Steptoe and Small Boy?) but this pic is already giving me Jack vibes.

 

[OwlRightsReserved]

Ruminating on the Family Silver Squig, and it just gets worse. Either it's a genuine offer (awful) or it's an attempt to impress (Jack? Jack's followers? I don't know) with the get-out clause of "I need to check with my family first and they might say no" (which is... also awful).

Sorry if this is really cynical but I can't get my head around it.

Fish knives are common ,Nancy Mitford said so. Also, completely unnecessary as properly cooked fish should easily flake away with a fork. Maybe Jack does need them

Ooh I'm going to re-read The Pursuit of Love this weekend.

 

[MancBee]

I have Googled both her recommended romantic restaurants.

Jack's idea of romantic is not mine.

One had to be a "mission inn" star restaurant, didn't it? #moneynoobbject

 

[Pavlova]

Vlad seems to think I want my living room to look like Jacksies manky dm's.... I don't think so!

 

[kachoochoo]

'Easy care for Nazi cutlery..' has killed me!
I have genuinely hurt myself laughing.

it's so funny, that's how i've written it in the list!

 

[Billybellend]

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….or she could sell it and donate the money to the RNLI? Just a thought

Well, well, well! What an absolute gem of a find! I suspect you will be very welcome here @HodgeSplodge!!

Literally no budget….

 

[meowquiz]

Sometimes I find it so hard to like the posts of our lovely screenshot-posters. In my head I appreciate the invaluable service and wish to bestow my meagre internet likes.

Then in my heart it hurts to like anything Jack has posted, and it's a mental block to overcome each time she posts something even dumber.

Surely someone else must have to battle that reflex too!?

 

[People-huv-tae-know]

Cuntlery is what Jack has bought.