Jack Monroe #232 Griftmas time, rattle tin and whine

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Pavlova said:
Sorry, I hope I haven't derailed the concert. I'll take a seat at the back after I've put this under the tree.
It's a Christmas miracle really, as I thought Toys R Us stopped selling clown face paint years ago, before it went under....
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Looks like my best mate's Constance Carrol palettes from 1989. She, however, had every reason to be buying such intense colours and that brand. That'll do nicely under the tree. But, of course it's Urban Decay again.

Doesn't appear to be so much mica in these eyeshadows. I wonder why glitter isn't so appealing this time?
 
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TheDragonWithAFlagon said:
Eternal Slopbot, who made this most holy night to shine with the brightness of your one Big Light:
Bring us, who have known the revelation of that light on earth, to see the radiance of your sentient mirror's glory;
through LJC our Lord,
who is in hiding and really doesn't need another scarf
in the unity of the Holy Alcohol Free Spirit, one Slopbot,
now and for ever

Anchoiade.
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You are my new heroine - this is honestly the best Christmas service I have ever attended ❤️ I hope this is going to carry on to New year - it’s brilliant - merry Christmas one and all, Cabal, you are all truly freaking brilliant xxxxx 🎄
 
Jack Aid 2021

[Jack (Young)]

It's Griftmastime
There's no need to be afraid
At Griftmastime
We let in light and we throw our shade

[Boy Jack]
And in my world of plenty
You can spread a gummy smile of joy
Throw your alms towards my world
At Griftmastime

[Jack Michael - after all, you gotta have faith]
But say a prayer
Pray for the worthy one
At Griftmastime it's hard

[Jack LeBonBons Through Airmail shoves her constantly sniffing nose in where it's not wanted)
But when you're having fun
There's a world outside your window
[Allergic Jack] And it's a world of dread and fear
Where the only cash that's flowing is

[Rish mate Jack elbows her way to the front]
Drowned out by the sting of tears
And the Griftmasbells that are ringing
Are clanging chimes of doom
Well, tonight thank Slop it's me instead of you.


[All the Jacks]
And there won't be butter in Southend now this Griftmastime.
The greatest gift they'll get this year is slop
Where nothing ever grows (because Jack rents! OK?)
No cash or postcards flow
Do you know it's Griftmastime at all?

Feed Jack praise
Let her know it's Griftmastime
Feed Jack's ego
Don't you know it's Griftmastime at all?

[Jack Young]
Here's to me
Raise a glass and pay me, this ain't for free
Here's to them
Underneath that burning big light
Don't you know it's Griftmastime at all?

[Chorus (All the Jacks)]
Feed the slop
Feed the slop
Feed the slop
Let Jack know it's Griftmastime again

Feed the pov
Let Jack know it's Griftmastime again
Feed the pov
Let Jack know it's Griftmastime again

Repeat
 
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Can someone please help me? I can’t stop singing

Prunes are buttered
All around us
Lightly mashed up, with some salt

Jack is rattling
Her poor half empty tip jar
Merry Griftmas, everyone

She’s gonna have a party tonight
Gonna kiss a middle age gal underneath the mistletoe
And hope she’s not money-light

Vegan dishes, only with some meat in
Sprinkle black pudding, on every thing
 
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