Jack Monroe #135 No measurable outcomes

[ScamSandwich]

Yes!! It reminds me of an ex-boyfriends mum, who would say things to me like that I should take it easy and lay down instead of cook, she insists on doing it, take it easy etc. In the next room she’d be rolling up her sleeves and loudly saying to him “right, your mum will make you some decent food now”!
Cow.


She can’t make a roux, doesn’t drink tea, only ever makes her own bread and has been on the bones of her arse for ten years... what’s your point, Lumpy mate?

The good thing about a grunka is that virtually every observation and impression I have when I read overtime working @Silver Linings 's (grab two chairs and have a nap. Now!!) receipts is later confirmed by the coven. It proves I have not lost my mind and that a whole coven can't be wrong.
Even when I think to myself "ah well, maybe I am going a bit far with my interpretation", bang, Frauen and Herren have been on the same line of thought.

 

[LyraBalaqua]

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bleeping smol, arrrrhhhhhhhh and you’re a shite cook, now duck off!

 

[Harrybosch]

Ugh. No offence to anyone who does like them, but as a vegetarian of 7 years I can tell you that Linda McCartney sausages, (and the veggie range in general), is SO BAD!!


Surely that's a draft she accidentally posted. LOL

I'm sorry, but I'll revoke people's tattle memberships who badmouth dear Linda and her sausages. #EndSausageHate. #FeedTheVegans

 

[Sideboard Bob]

Hi Jackie, (we know you read here), you can hang this up next to the Emin

 

[I’MBUSY!]

I was wondering if school choices was the reason she's suddenly become a very vocal "Christian".

I am not in England though so I could be way off.

Oh this is excellent. I'd thought it was just so she could do her pious thing, but what you're saying makes a lot of sense.

 

[Readingismyhobby]

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Are there worms on top of that “food “?

 

[Emmapism]

Saw this and thought of Jack

 

[jenny2603]

It’s like flipping steptoe and son round her house. Constant supply of rag and bone man items mixed in with pianos, tellys, iPhones, watches, guitars and branded crockery.

Yes it is. Except instead of shouting "'arold feed the 'orse" it's "'arold wank the horse -it's lasagne for tea"

 

[ScamSandwich]

Oh this is excellent. I'd thought it was just so she could do her pious thing, but what you're saying makes a lot of sense.

You are right. This time I thought it was manic (bungalow) preacher suffering from loss of sleep but it must have been calculating behaviour again.

 

[Readingismyhobby]

Well you're not bleeping quiet for starters

And she definitely can’t cook

 

[LennyBriscoe]

3 showers?! In a flat?! How the duck is that possible?!

Luxury executive flat looool the dreams new build developers sell the middle classes ❤

 

[Emmapism]

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We had one of these!

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

Linda sausages aren’t like Richmond ones admittedly. But you really shouldn’t put them in a curry. The texture and flavour is all wrong.

If you are trying to introduce someone to that kind of replacement product, pairing them with a rich oniony gravy and a creamy mash ( both easy to veganise) would be nicer for everyone.

Getting the distinct impression none of this is actually eaten. Obviously the sweets weren’t either.

 

[LennyBriscoe]

We had one of these!

Us too. And we didn’t even have three of those bad boys let alone three showers

 

[Into_the_tunnel]

We had one of these!

Freezing or boiling. Then being shouted at for using too much water so given a plastic mug instead.

 

[I’MBUSY!]

!!! How would you rank yourself out of ten for grace and compassion, Jacks?

 

[Readingismyhobby]

We had one of these!

And me. The horror of washing long hair using one of those. Especially when one end would ping off the tap

 

[Sideboard Bob]

And me. The horror of washing long hair using one of those. Especially when one end would ping off the tap

Me too! Sorry for the reaction but the “ping off the tap“ brought it all back! Pfft, JM and and her 3 showers, doesn’t know what she’s been missing!

 

[Eurgh]

But she doesn’t eat sugar?

No, she gets her energy from misusing ADHD meds.

 

[jenny2603]

I'm sorry, but I'll revoke people's tattle memberships who badmouth dear Linda and her sausages. #EndSausageHate. #FeedTheVegans

Me too. The best local roll shop* in South Glasgow favours a "Linda Link" for their fine veggie offerings so that's good enough for me.

*This is not a sponsored post but a sincere desire to let Weegie fraus know that Good Times Roll on Copland Rd is the best and defend Linda Links.