IVF and Fertility Treatments

[NaeDebates]

Hello and thank you for reading my story. Im sorry for your losses

I had an endometrium function test done at coventry implantation clinic. Its self funded (£540) but they gave me my results and gave me a protocol to follow should i wish to go for fertility treatment again. Heres the link to where i booked mine

Implantation clinic

Implantation clinic

warwick.ac.uk

I hope this helps. All instructions is on there xx

Thank you so much Hope you’re doing ok x

 

[Onlylittleme]

Just come across this thread. Does anyone ever feel so alone in their journey? I've met alot of friends through infertility groups etc. And was always great to have support from ladies who understory what each other was going through. But now they've all had their positives. And I don't feel like I can moan to them anymore as I feel bad bringing negative to them. Although I know they understand. Or even those times when you've had a kick in the teeth with a pregnancy announcement and you could off load to those friends, but now I don't feel I can off-load about pregnancy announcements to pregnant friends. Sorry I've gone off on one lol

 

[Jennynotfromtheblock]

Just come across this thread. Does anyone ever feel so alone in their journey? I've met alot of friends through infertility groups etc. And was always great to have support from ladies who understory what each other was going through. But now they've all had their positives. And I don't feel like I can moan to them anymore as I feel bad bringing negative to them. Although I know they understand. Or even those times when you've had a kick in the teeth with a pregnancy announcement and you could off load to those friends, but now I don't feel I can off-load about pregnancy announcements to pregnant friends. Sorry I've gone off on one lol

Absolutely so alone, I know of people who have had fertility struggles but none close enough to talk to about it or they haven't talked to me about theirs, so I feel I shouldn't broach the subject with them as it's obviously something they don't want to discuss, I tend to only tell women who I would know in work who are older and who are finished having kids as I know then they aren't turn around next month and be like oh we have some news... cos that's just the stage my friends are at

None of our embryos made it past day 3 unfortunately, devastated, can't believe after going through egg retrieval which is not easy, we are left with nothing, we've spent 5,000 and I feel further away from ever getting pregnant because they think there might be an egg factor now, which no test has indicated previously. I feel like our clinic, like all clinics here will just give me the usual we don't know why you're not pregnant spiel so thinking of spending another small fortune now to go to the fertility detective jessica bourke, I think consultations with her are thousands but we could spend another €5k on an egg retrieval and still end up with no embryos

 

[Onlylittleme]

Absolutely so alone, I know of people who have had fertility struggles but none close enough to talk to about it or they haven't talked to me about theirs, so I feel I shouldn't broach the subject with them as it's obviously something they don't want to discuss, I tend to only tell women who I would know in work who are older and who are finished having kids as I know then they aren't turn around next month and be like oh we have some news... cos that's just the stage my friends are at

None of our embryos made it past day 3 unfortunately, devastated, can't believe after going through egg retrieval which is not easy, we are left with nothing, we've spent 5,000 and I feel further away from ever getting pregnant because they think there might be an egg factor now, which no test has indicated previously. I feel like our clinic, like all clinics here will just give me the usual we don't know why you're not pregnant spiel so thinking of spending another small fortune now to go to the fertility detective jessica bourke, I think consultations with her are thousands but we could spend another €5k on an egg retrieval and still end up with no embryos

I see you all my friends have no either already had their babies (or their 3rd lol ) or else they are now pregnant. Even my 'infertility' friends have now got their positives. It's so so tough. Sometimes you just need an irrational rant and cry. But can't do that with anyone else now. Unfortunately I'm over 20k into it. 2 full cycles, 6 embryos and nothing to show for it except more wrinkles and lots more grey hair
And I don't feel ready to give up just yet but don't know what our next step is or how we will afford it.

I'm so sorry you're feeling alone too. It's such a tough lonely place to be. But I'm always ears if you need a rant here xx

 

[Jennynotfromtheblock]

I see you all my friends have no either already had their babies (or their 3rd lol ) or else they are now pregnant. Even my 'infertility' friends have now got their positives. It's so so tough. Sometimes you just need an irrational rant and cry. But can't do that with anyone else now. Unfortunately I'm over 20k into it. 2 full cycles, 6 embryos and nothing to show for it except more wrinkles and lots more grey hair
And I don't feel ready to give up just yet but don't know what our next step is or how we will afford it.

I'm so sorry you're feeling alone too. It's such a tough lonely place to be. But I'm always ears if you need a rant here xx

Thank you, sorry to hear you have had it really tough, have your clinic been much help?

It feels like the most uncertain thing in the world like if you knew it would be 2 more cycles and then it would work you could get through it but so hard when there is just no guarantees

 

[Onlylittleme]

Thank you, sorry to hear you have had it really tough, have your clinic been much help?

It feels like the most uncertain thing in the world like if you knew it would be 2 more cycles and then it would work you could get through it but so hard when there is just no guarantees

My clinic have been great for what they offer but they offer basic testing etc. So unfortunately thinking our next cycle will have to be with a new clinic elsewhere, that provide more options. Yea the unknown is the worst part.
What do you think about Ur clinic x

 

[make-mine-whiskey]

Just needing a sounding board tbh. Feeling very deflated recently and feel like giving up. So many announcements recently and it's hitting me so so hard. I just feel like this is never going to happen for us. Our referral appt is next Thursday, but that just seems so long away we only get one round as well at our NHS hospital so I'm trying to throw absolutely everything at this, haven't drank alcohol since NYE, consistent activity whether it's a walk or a workout, cut down caffeine and that's both of us not just me. Just feeling a lot atm and I'm exhausted

 

[Lola UK]

Out of interest, how long did it take for you to get an appointment with the fertility clinic after your drs have sent off the referral? I know everywhere will be different! Just wondered if it were weeks or months

 

[make-mine-whiskey]

Out of interest, how long did it take for you to get an appointment with the fertility clinic after your drs have sent off the referral? I know everywhere will be different! Just wondered if it were weeks or months

Mine took a year... I started the process last March 2022, had bloods ect, came back 'satisfactory' hubs had 2x semen analysis one in May 22 one is September 22 and then we were referred in November 22, fertility clinic this March 23. Although we don't like in a big city or anything so anything around here takes twice as long lol

 

[Lola UK]

Mine took a year... I started the process last March 2022, had bloods ect, came back 'satisfactory' hubs had 2x semen analysis one in May 22 one is September 22 and then we were referred in November 22, fertility clinic this March 23. Although we don't like in a big city or anything so anything around here takes twice as long lol

Thanks for your reply, didn’t think it would be a quick process

Ive had my bloods (normal) so waiting on semen analysis and will go from there.

Good luck with your appointment! Next Thursday is so close!

 

[Ouch]

I went for egg retrieval yesterday. Those 4-5 "follicles" were just empty sacks or cysts. No eggs. Zero. I should be waiting from a call from the embryologist right now but instead I'm trying to WFH, in pain and heartbroken. They booked us an emergency follow up appointment for Friday to discuss next steps but i don't really see the point, it feels like we'll be throwing good money after bad to chase a pipe dream.

I feel so stupid for being positive and thinking that it would work. Of course it wasn't going to work, if it didn't happen naturally after 5 years then why would IVF be any different? Maybe we're just not meant to be parents.

 

[Onlylittleme]

I went for egg retrieval yesterday. Those 4-5 "follicles" were just empty sacks or cysts. No eggs. Zero. I should be waiting from a call from the embryologist right now but instead I'm trying to WFH, in pain and heartbroken. They booked us an emergency follow up appointment for Friday to discuss next steps but i don't really see the point, it feels like we'll be throwing good money after bad to chase a pipe dream.

I feel so stupid for being positive and thinking that it would work. Of course it wasn't going to work, if it didn't happen naturally after 5 years then why would IVF be any different? Maybe we're just not meant to be parents.

Please don't feel stupid for being positive. It's the only thing that sometimes get us through stuff like this.

Just because you got no eggs in this cycle doesn't mean that another one will be the same. My two cycles were different. And I've heard of alot of people have different outcomes from cycles.
But I do understand that it's very hard to put yourself through another cycle knowing that you have the potential to have the same heartbreak. It's so hard. And honestly anyone who's been through infertility and IVF regardless of how many transfers or the outcome, they're all warriors in my eyes

What is your AMH ? and what medication were you on ?

 

[Ouch]

Please don't feel stupid for being positive. It's the only thing that sometimes get us through stuff like this.

Just because you got no eggs in this cycle doesn't mean that another one will be the same. My two cycles were different. And I've heard of alot of people have different outcomes from cycles.
But I do understand that it's very hard to put yourself through another cycle knowing that you have the potential to have the same heartbreak. It's so hard. And honestly anyone who's been through infertility and IVF regardless of how many transfers or the outcome, they're all warriors in my eyes

What is your AMH ? and what medication were you on ?

My AMH is low. I think they said it was 1, I'm 38 and my mum went through early menopause in her early 40's.

I did 350 units of Gonal F for 14 days and 11 days of cetrotide. I did my trigger shot on Saturday night which was 2 x 5,000 units of Gonsai.

 

[Onlylittleme]

My AMH is low. I think they said it was 1, I'm 38 and my mum went through early menopause in her early 40's.

I did 350 units of Gonal F for 14 days and 11 days of cetrotide. I did my trigger shot on Saturday night which was 2 x 5,000 units of Gonsai.

If going for another round is something that you do consider at some stage, it's worth asking the doc for different meds, as someone react differently to different meds. I've heard of people having Menopur alongside Gonal F. I don't think there's much difference in the trigger shots as they tend to do the same thing.
My first cycle I got 3 eggs. With an increase in meds for the next cycle I got 7 eggs.

But personally I'd go for the review. See what they reckon happened with that cycle and see what they recommend going forward. You're under no obligation to continue if you don't want to. But the review might just give you some answers.
But fully understand the want to not go again it's such a hard thing to go through. I'm 5 transfers deep and each one gets harder XX

 

[Jennynotfromtheblock]

I went for egg retrieval yesterday. Those 4-5 "follicles" were just empty sacks or cysts. No eggs. Zero. I should be waiting from a call from the embryologist right now but instead I'm trying to WFH, in pain and heartbroken. They booked us an emergency follow up appointment for Friday to discuss next steps but i don't really see the point, it feels like we'll be throwing good money after bad to chase a pipe dream.

I feel so stupid for being positive and thinking that it would work. Of course it wasn't going to work, if it didn't happen naturally after 5 years then why would IVF be any different? Maybe we're just not meant to be parents.

So sorry to hear that, it's horrible to go through egg retrieval and end up with essentially nothing, the only good that can come out of it is that hopefully your clinic can change protocol and achieve better results for you xx

 

[Lola UK]

Super annoying, my partner called to ask about his sperm analysis results and they said it was contaminated so needs to provide another one! It can’t be helped, but frustrating they didn’t call to let us know straight away

How’s everyone getting on?

 

[Greenfly125]

Super annoying, my partner called to ask about his sperm analysis results and they said it was contaminated so needs to provide another one! It can’t be helped, but frustrating they didn’t call to let us know straight away

How’s everyone getting on?

I had a similar issue. I did my day 2 blood tests, and my day 21 too. They lost my day 21 bloods but failed to let me know they were missing those results. So frustrating.

 

[Ouch]

I went to a follow up appointment on Friday to find out why there were no eggs when they went for egg retrieval. The long and short of it was that they don't know. Low ovarian reserve mainly.

They gave us 5% chance of getting pregnant using my eggs, and 30-40% using a donor egg. The wait time is 12-18 months for a donor egg. They also called me later on and said that they had just received news that our area will be increasing funding from 1st April so we get potentially 2 more funded chances, but there are caveats as below:

1) If we use the funding for another round using my eggs and any of the following happens:
-They don't collect any eggs
-The eggs fail to fertilize
-The embryos don't start dividing
Then we lose the chance of a further funded round. We would however get another chance using my eggs if all the above happened and the embryo failed to implant or I miscarry.
2) If we chose the donor route we get 2 rounds, regardless of whether the eggs fertilize and so on.
3)We lose the right to further funding if we self fund another round using my eggs before using the funded options.

Ideally I want to try again with my own eggs, because I'm not ready to write them off yet so I'm gutted that we can't just have one more try with my own before trying donor eggs, and I understand that the chances of it happening are so low so it would probably be in vain.

We are short on time because any treatment needs to start before my 40th Birthday and I'm already 38.

My Partner said we need to go with the stats and that a 5% chance isn't really hopeful, especially when compared with a 30-40% chance using donor eggs. I said I understand that but it's easy for him because it would be his sperm that fertilizes the donor egg, he replied "but you'd be doing all the hard work by growing it - nobody cares about where the flour in the bread comes from, they care how well it's baked!" and that made me laugh even though I'm not sure the analogy has any substance .

My head is a mess and on top of this my pregnant sister is moaning to all of our other siblings and parents that "most other sisters would be making things for their Niece or Nephew, would be shopping for baby things together, planning a baby shower, getting gifts for the baby and mum to be" and it makes me feel like the shittiest person in the world. I struggled to even look at her when we had a family gathering last week. It was 3 days after the failed egg collection and I felt so devastated by that so I just didn't even want to acknowledge her pregnancy. All the talk was of the baby and her being pregnant and "something must be in the water! because after you announced your pregnancy three other people I know have also announced they are expecting!" and I sat there thinking "not in the water I'm drinking, clearly " I've had to archive the family WhatsApp group because it feels like a punch to the gut every time a message comes through. I totally get that they are all excited and in their happy bubble, and I so desperately want to be in that bubble with them. I am trying so hard and I've scheduled a counselling session with the IVF clinic in the hope that I can turn these negative emotions into positive emotions and start to feel happy for them, whilst also coming to terms with the fact I will likely never have a child with my own eggs.

Sorry to be a debbie downer, I needed to vent.

 

[make-mine-whiskey]

I went to a follow up appointment on Friday to find out why there were no eggs when they went for egg retrieval. The long and short of it was that they don't know. Low ovarian reserve mainly.

They gave us 5% chance of getting pregnant using my eggs, and 30-40% using a donor egg. The wait time is 12-18 months for a donor egg. They also called me later on and said that they had just received news that our area will be increasing funding from 1st April so we get potentially 2 more funded chances, but there are caveats as below:

1) If we use the funding for another round using my eggs and any of the following happens:
-They don't collect any eggs
-The eggs fail to fertilize
-The embryos don't start dividing
Then we lose the chance of a further funded round. We would however get another chance using my eggs if all the above happened and the embryo failed to implant or I miscarry.
2) If we chose the donor route we get 2 rounds, regardless of whether the eggs fertilize and so on.
3)We lose the right to further funding if we self fund another round using my eggs before using the funded options.

Ideally I want to try again with my own eggs, because I'm not ready to write them off yet so I'm gutted that we can't just have one more try with my own before trying donor eggs, and I understand that the chances of it happening are so low so it would probably be in vain.

We are short on time because any treatment needs to start before my 40th Birthday and I'm already 38.

My Partner said we need to go with the stats and that a 5% chance isn't really hopeful, especially when compared with a 30-40% chance using donor eggs. I said I understand that but it's easy for him because it would be his sperm that fertilizes the donor egg, he replied "but you'd be doing all the hard work by growing it - nobody cares about where the flour in the bread comes from, they care how well it's baked!" and that made me laugh even though I'm not sure the analogy has any substance .

My head is a mess and on top of this my pregnant sister is moaning to all of our other siblings and parents that "most other sisters would be making things for their Niece or Nephew, would be shopping for baby things together, planning a baby shower, getting gifts for the baby and mum to be" and it makes me feel like the shittiest person in the world. I struggled to even look at her when we had a family gathering last week. It was 3 days after the failed egg collection and I felt so devastated by that so I just didn't even want to acknowledge her pregnancy. All the talk was of the baby and her being pregnant and "something must be in the water! because after you announced your pregnancy three other people I know have also announced they are expecting!" and I sat there thinking "not in the water I'm drinking, clearly " I've had to archive the family WhatsApp group because it feels like a punch to the gut every time a message comes through. I totally get that they are all excited and in their happy bubble, and I so desperately want to be in that bubble with them. I am trying so hard and I've scheduled a counselling session with the IVF clinic in the hope that I can turn these negative emotions into positive emotions and start to feel happy for them, whilst also coming to terms with the fact I will likely never have a child with my own eggs.

Sorry to be a debbie downer, I needed to vent.

I just like to say that your feelings about your siblings and family are totally valid. My BIL girlfriend is due in the next few days and I honestly can't even think of buying them anything baby related. I'm really sorry you are going through this and please do not ever apologise for being down, this is what this thread if for and we will also listen to what everyone has to say. Sending you big hugs x

 

[make-mine-whiskey]

Hi all, update from our first appointment. She went over all our results and I expressed that GP receptionist said my bloods were 'satisfactory' she explained that all my bloods were normal and indicate i do ovulate so were good there, my husband first semen analysis was less than 1% then it did go up a little to over 1% on his second, so that's some sort of positive. She did confirm that we would need IVF but we have to get our BMI's to below 30 first before we can start the process... We are rebooked in for 6 months time and the meantime I will have an ultrasound and thyroid test.

Don't really know how to feel if I'm honest, never thought 2 years ago I would be saying we needed IVF